Crossing The Bridge Page #4

don't work at a place anymore.

What do you mean?

You're kidding, right?

No, no, no.

I'm not kidding.

You're firing me?

I overslept! It's 4:30 in the afternoon.

Well, I was up late.

So was I...

Thinkin' about Manny.

Alby, look,

I am sorry about your friend, okay?

I really am.

But, hey, I didn't kill the guy, all right?

No one said you killed him.

The fact is,

you're not interested in this

typewriter business, and

I don't want you around here anymore.

Uncle Alby, I...

go on, get out of here.

I got a business to run.

Alby, come on, I...

get out of here.

Hi.

You must be Jack's buddies. You must

be Monica. Thanks for inviting us.

I'm Danny.

This is mort and Tim.

It's a great house. Thanks.

It's my parents'.

Better be.

Danny Morgan!

Smilin' Jack Harper.

Congratulations, pal.

General motors junior executive.

Not bad, harps.

Guys, these are my old buddies,

Danny, Tim and mort.

This is Ollie, elan, Ellen and Chris,

people you'd know if you ever

came to Ann arbor to visit.

And Randy you guys know, right?

Yeah, Randall sussman.

It's been a long time.

Tim Reese, wearing the same

clothes as when I saw you last.

Yeah, y-you were in tights at the time.

Weren't you in some play?

Still getting drunk every night and driving

around in the war wagon, I'll bet.

It seems to me you used to jump through

hoops to get in the war wagon.

I remember you bought us a case

of beer just to ride with us.

That's funny, 'cause I seem to remember

you offering your sister, Randall.

Hey, Randy, you're still up in

school in Toronto, right? Pre law.

What are you doing nowadays?

Didn't I hear you were,

pumping gas or something?

Randy, are you still upset that we

flushed your head in the toilet...

And gave you that swirlie in the 10th grade?

Your hair's dry now.

Give us a break.

Hey, r-Randy, you ever see Carol

brockton up there anymore?

As a matter of fact, I see her a lot.

She drove down with me.

Carol brockton?

She's, she's in town?

- She's in the kitchen.

- Sh-sh-she's here?

In this kitchen?

Now?

Well... sure. Excuse me.

Mort. Hi.

Carol!

My g...

this is such a surprise! You were like

the last person I expected to see here.

This is so funny. What are you doing here?

I came up for Jack's party.

How are you? I'm good. I'm good.

Great!

Mort, you look...

you look the same.

The same?

Is the same good?

No, the same's great.

Can I have a hug?

Excuse me, everybody.

Dinner is served.

Are you ready to sit down, honey?

Yeah, I'll be there in a minute.

It's really good seeing you, mort.

Hey, mort!

Zero in, buddy.

I don't know about campaign work.

I spent my summer busting my hump for some

guy and then I didn't even vote for him.

I didn't realize you could get all that with a

gold card. I thought it was just for status.

Tell her to bend over.

I'll give her some status.

I think the two industries will merge,

especially by the time it makes

a difference to anyone our age.

I hope it happens soon.

I want my father to lose his shirt while

I'm young enough to appreciate it.

What if he is elected and the

student body gets behind him?

He could affect the law department.

Will you look at those two? I want

to be around when they're thirty,

drivin' a war wagon!

We have a chance to capitalize

on the baby-boomer years.

That's right! What did you do there?

Can I have a drink, please?

How many of you will get to be

what you wanted to be as a kid?

What?

How many of you will do for a living

what you wanted to do as a child?

It's a simple question.

There's a very simple answer.

What's the answer, mort?

The answer, Randall,

is probably none of you.

Maybe one or two, but I doubt it.

Don't get me wrong. You're all

likely to be very successful,

but I don't think ultimately any of

you will see your dreams come true.

Monica, thank you for dinner.

It was great.

What was that all about?

See you later. Stay dry! Drive safe.

Danny, thanks for comin'.

I really appreciate it.

Thanks a lot. Timmy, thanks, man.

Take it easy.

Don't be strangers, all right?

Glad that's over.

High-tech b*tch.

What a zoo.

Can't believe I made it through the

night without kickin' someone's ass.

What about mort?

What the hell got into him?

I don't know.

I kinda liked it.

That was the only thing that shut

those windbags up the whole night.

No sh*t! For once in his life,

he was actually pretty cool.

Thanks, Tim.

I was pretty cool, if I do say so myself.

What the hell are you doing back there?

You been out here all night?

It was the one hitch.

I forgot I didn't have a ride.

What the hell got into you?

I don't know.

Nothing, really.

I thought they were all

a bit too smug, you know?

Needed to be brought down a couple pegs.

Next time, wait 'til the end

of the night, moron. I know.

Did you see me kiss her, though?

Did you?

It was pretty neat?

God, I love her.

For sale.

What the hell is this?

Hey, Lou.

Remember this?

I taught you and your mother

to pitch on this thing.

Heh! Got it at K-Mart.

Must have cost all of $8.

What's goin' on?

Faye and I are gettin' married, pal.

Hey, hey, look at this.

Your first bicycle.

Lou, you two don't even know each other.

All you do is get drunk every

night and sit on the front porch.

Come on, Danny.

Don't be sayin' stuff...

That you're just gonna regret up the road.

What's going on with the house, Lou?

What's with the "for sale" sign

and the cleaning-up crap?

We're gonna sell the house.

Faye's not comfortable here and then...

We're gonna get an apartment,

somethin' with a nice balcony,

maybe overlookin' a golf course.

You don't think you needed to tell me?

You just put up a sign?

It's my house.

This is my f***ing house too!

- Now, settle down.

- No! You settle down!

Hey, Danny.

Shut up, mort.

Danny, come on?

I just...

stay away from me, Lou!

This is my f***ing house!

Anyone want a beer?

F*** you, faye.

Come on, mort.

Let's go.

You know, I'm really surprised

that you'd sell the house, Lou,

especially after all the hard

work you did on the front porch.

Okay, then gilligan says

to the Professor, right,

"hey, Professor,

have you seen Mrs. howell?"

And the Professor says to gilligan...

"she's in the hut washing her tits, gilligan.

Why don't you beat it?"

The Professor now says to gilligan,

"I'm sorry to tell you this, gilligan,

but Mrs. howell

is dead."

Commercial, right?

So we come back from the commercial, right?

Gilligan's still stunned.

He doesn't know what's going on. Mort,

Mrs. howell is dead.

I thought this was supposed to be a comedy.

It is, Danny. I told you,

it's a nightmare sequence.

Gilligan is having a nightmare that

everyone on the island dies but him.

Hey, mort, I don't want

to rain on your parade,

but they don't make

"gilligan's island" anymore.

I don't wanna rain on your parade either,

but I know that, okay?

I just happen to be writing what

is known as a sample script...

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