Cul-de-sac

What the hell are you doing?

I'm fed up.

What about me?

It's digging into me.

- Where?

- In my back.

- Well, here we are.

- Where?

In - In the sh*t.

Thanks to your idiotic ideas.

Yeah, you're always the smart one.

That's easy.

Gee!

There must be a telephone

at the end of these wires.

- Stop rocking the boat.

- What?

Stop - boat.

Can't understand a word.

Hang on, Albie. I'll be back.

You're mad!

You're absolutely mad!

- He's cute. He won't -

- Throw it away!

Throw it away!

Um -

Anybody home?

Hello?

Anyone in?

Don't put your feet

in my face like that.

I'm going to get you at last!

Go! Go! Go!

The main body of his work

was written at Abbotsford.

Oh. Oh, yes.

But the astonishing part of it, uh -

Of course, it's not a very long novel.

- No. A lot of work.

- Pen is still there.

Hmm? Oh, uh, really?

Pen, yes, and, uh - and slippers and pipe.

Mmm.

The old tobacco pouch and bric-a-brac.

Yes. Oh!

Sorry.

I was going to say,

I thought you'd seen the room.

No.

I could've sworn Teresa

showed you the whole castle.

- No, she didn't.

- Would you like to see it?

No, I'd rather get home now, darling,

before it gets too dark.

- Are you sure?

- It never gets dark in this blasted place.

- Christopher!

- Are you all right with that thing?

I think so.

So he used to work

up behind the stained glass, did he?

That's right.

You have a fantastic view from there.

- Christopher!

- It's really rather moving.

- What is it now?

- Oh, there you are, darling.

- Do come down. We're leaving now.

- On a clear day, you can see right across the bay.

- All right, all right!

- The most fantastic view.

Oh, here's your binoculars.

I nearly forgot to give them to you.

- Thank you so much.

- What are you doing on Sunday?

I think we've got

some people coming actually.

Well, we were having some people

over here. I thought -

We might be able to come over by car.

- We don't want to come by boat. It's so -

- We must get the tide right, dear.

- You don't want to brave those ocean waves again.

- No, I don't.

- Do say good-bye to Teresa for us.

- Yes, I will. She'll be very disappointed.

I'm sorry we didn't see her

before we went.

Oh, Christopher, I've hardly seen you.

Where have you been?

- I've been shrimping.

- Shrimping? What, with Teresa?

Bye-bye then.

I say, if you come over Sunday,

we might fly the kite again.

Oh, it'd be great fun.

- About Sunday -

- Well, we'll give you a ring.

- Yes, we're on the -

- You're on the phone, aren't you?

- Oh, yes.

- Right then.

Oh, we must be going, Daddy, darling. Yes.

I'd rather we go

before it gets dark, darling.

- Bye-bye.

- Well, many thanks.

It's been a great pleasure. Really.

- Yes. Bye-bye.

- I hope you make it on Sunday.

Say good-bye to Teresa for us.

Watch that thing.

You'll be taking off in a minute.

Bye-bye.

- It's a hell of a long drive.

- Yes.

Perhaps we'll give you a ring.

- I'd like to send messages up my string.

- Oh, you would? How would do you do that?

Oh, you could tie them -

Little pieces of paper - tie them around...

- and then you force them up.

- Sounds a bit tricky.

- Why don't I give you -

- Well, we'll give you a ring, shall we?

- What's your number?

- One-one.

- Oh, one-one.

- That's double-one.

- Double-one-one.

- One-one.

- No. Just one-one.

- One-one. Double-one.

- All right, come back next Sunday.

- Bye!

- Bye!

- Cheerio!

Come along, darling. Bye!

Bye-bye. Try to get over again.

Maybe I'll run a message up.

- Oh, yes, yes. Bye!

- Bye!

Oh, what the -

Is that all?

- Is that all you've caught?

- No.

Five shrimps? Huh.

- It was full.

- I'm not completely blind.

- You eat them all.

- "All"? Five shrimps?

Delicious. Thank you very much.

That's -

I'll manage without.

I'll make myself an omelet.

Very therapeutic for my ulcer.

- Have you seen the big frying pan?

- It's on the table.

Outside.

Thank you very much.

No. I'm sorry. It isn't there.

Son of a b*tch.

What does he think he's doing

leaving me alone like this?

Richard! I got a problem here!

It's up to my -

I got a problem!

-

- Have you seen my pajama top?

Baby, have you seen my pajama top?

Look under the bed.

And now for you lucky night people...

here in a different mood is a swinging disk

by one of our newest groups.

Put that on.

Oh, baby.

You're sitting -

Oh, you -

Look.

Give me that.

No. No.

- Come here.

- No, no.

- Please, please.

- No, not on the eyes.

Please. They'll be just a little bit black.

Oh. Oh, what a beauty.

Let me see.

- Give me the other now.

- No, no, no.

- That's it.

- Give me the other. Give me -

Please. Come here. Come here.

Come here.

What are you doing tonight, baby?

I'm going home to Mummy and Daddy.

Your carriage awaits.

- Shh!

- What?

Do you hear something?

No. I can't hear a thing.

Somebody was walking on the terrace.

No, there's nobody there.

Oh. You gave me such a fright.

Ah - Ah - Ah -

Ah-choo!

Number, please.

- Hello?

- Number, please.

I want the St. Cuthbert Arms Hotel,

Maplethorpe-On-Sea.

- Mablethorpe.

- All right. Mablethorpe.

- On-Sea.

- On-Sea.

I want a personal call to Mr. Katelbach.

Do you know the number?

No, I don't know the number

of the hotel, Operator.

It'll be in the book.

- Will you please get it for me, honey?

- What's your number there?

Just a second, please.

Lindisfarne 1-1.

Thank you, sir.

What name did you say?

- Katelbach.

- Could you spell it, please?

K-A-T-E-L-B-A-C-H.

- A little slower, please.

- All right.

"K" for "kitty."

"A" for "Andy."

"T" for - for, uh -

Did you say "T"? For "tea"?

That's right. "T" for "tea."

E-L-B -

- "D"?

- No. "B."

- For "Peter"?

- "B" for "Bess" and "boy."

- For "boy."

- That's right.

A-C-H.

- Katelbach.

- That's right.

- I'll ring you back.

- Thank you.

Is anybody there?

Yes. Me.

Dickie.

I took the liberty of using the phone 'cause

Albert and me are having a little trouble.

Trouble?

Trouble or not,

you have very strange manners.

One doesn't usually burst in

on people without warning...

especially at this hour.

One doesn't choose the time

one gets into trouble.

Actually, I don't know

what prevents me calling the police.

I told you Albert and me

are having some trouble.

Get it... little fairy?

Aw, the hell with you.

Hello.

You both better help me

if you want to stay healthy.

- Hold on, please.

- Hello?

- And don't panic. No hysterics.

- Nobody's panicking!

- Sorry to keep you.

- Hello?

- I'll have your call in an hour.

- What?

- There's nought -

- In an hour?

- Would you like to keep the call in?

- Yes, yes! I'll keep the call in.

First off, we gotta fetch somebody.

- It'll be easier if all three of us push.

- Push?

I suppose you don't mind

if we put on some clothes first.

Yes, I do mind. Get goin'.

I'll show you the way.

- Wait. I'll be -

- Come on.

What - What's going on here?

What?

There was no water here before!

It's the evening tide.

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