Dave Made a Maze Page #3

and wandered off.

If he had paint cans for feet.

What am I looking at?

Hooves.

It's a minotaur.

Um, what?

Half bull, half man.

Feeds on human flesh,

haunts labyrinths.

Are you telling me that Dave

is killing and eating people?

No, the traps are killing people

and the minotaur is eating them.

Ok, but if

Dave made the minotaur,

couldn't he just

tell it to stop?

How do you make a minotaur?

I don't know.

Ok, that's it.

I'm cutting a hole

all the way to the outside.

No, no, Annie,

Dave said that we shouldn't.

Well, he's gonna get over it.

It's the least of his concerns.

Annie?

Annie, Annie!

You gotta hurry up!

It's rough.

Annie, we gotta get out of here!

I'm almost done!

Annie!

I got it, I got it!

Ahhh!

Oh.

Brynn, come on!

Get out of here.

Let's move it.

Get out of here!

There's no point.

We can't stop it.

It just keeps coming.

- Dave!

- Hey! Follow me.

Sh*t!

Which way?

I don't know,

I'm just as lost as you.

Wait.

Go, go!

What are you guys doing in here?

What have you done?

I'm sorry, Ok?

Things,

got out of hand.

None of this

should have happened.

What did you think

was gonna happen?

It was just cardboard.

No one was supposed to get hurt!

Are you getting

the ineptitude and boyish charm?

Well, it's not just

cardboard anymore!

I said don't come in.

I said it's too dangerous.

This is a rescue, you dick!

We're gonna die.

And it's all your fault.

This will work.

All right, through here.

You have to trust me.

I can't lose you guys.

Come on, guys!

Whoa!

Stop it...

Whoa!

What was that?

Dave, we... oh, wow.

Hmm.

Ok.

I suppose this was

only a matter of time.

Are we safe down here?

Safe?

We're not even people.

Dave, are we safe?

We should probably keep moving.

Is this permanent?

Nothing in here is.

Apparently.

But it's all going to be Ok once

we get back to the apartment.

I promise.

Can you get us there?

Dave, can you get us home?

Run!

It's all gonna be Ok once

we get back to the apartment,

it's all gonna be Ok once

we get back to the apartment,

ah, look out!

It'll all be Ok once

we get back to the apartment,

careful!

Why do you always

have to make it so hard?

Because they say, if it were

easy, everyone would do it.

That does not apply to this

situation in any way whatsoever!

Wait.

What's that sound?

Oh, boy.

Duck!

Is everybody Ok?

Oh.

Well, that's not so bad.

This way!

Everybody, down here!

Go, go, go,

- here.

- What's this?

Old fort trick, temporary wall.

- What?

- Just tape it.

Shh!

What the f*** did you do?

It's a passion project.

Dave, Greg and Brynn are dead!

- Damn it.

- And Jane with the head.

Damn it! Why didn't you

guys listen to me?

I didn't want

anyone to get hurt.

It's me.

Well, I'm not trying

to kill anyone.

Ok, I can explain it.

I can explain everything.

No, I can't.

Who else came in?

- Everybody.

- Whooo-Kay. Um...

Well, then we should

probably get out of here.

Um, thank you guys

for coming to get me.

Shall we?

Even if we get out of the maze,

- we still have a water buffalo...

- Minotaur.

Minotaur in our apartment!

Annie makes a great point.

It's a temporary fix. It's not

going to keep it out forever.

It's time to make some

motherfucking bull burgers.

- Kill it.

- Great.

Good idea.

Um, but about the maze itself?

Well, I guess it's time

to take out the recycling.

Another great option

from Gordon. Thank you.

Or,

how about we finish it?

Right, guys?

'Cause I've got

all these supplies.

We've got tape,

I've got so much cardboard...

Dave, we are not building more.

Yeah, this sounds like work.

It is work,

but think about the reward!

- Dave!

- No, you don't understand.

Instead of trying

to defeat the maze,

we've gotta complete the maze!

We're not just doing that

because it rhymes.

Well, then, how about instead

of trying to diminish it,

you guys help me finish it?

How about instead of rhyming,

- fine wining?

- Guys, focus!

What about the minotaur?

Um, we'll just have

to defeat him,

and even the score. Oh!

- Yes!

- Yes!

- He's back.

- Felt nice.

- Come on, guys!

- Listen, I am so close.

Close to what? How could you

even think about building more?

I know

it's dangerous and unstable,

but that's because

it's incomplete.

And I... if you just

let me finish it...

You just want to

keep working on it

so that we don't have

to destroy it.

Dave, we have to

get out of here.

- Follow me.

- Beautiful.

Can I get one more

for safety? Dave?

For safety. Dave?

What is it?

This is, um...

What's wrong?

I'm not sure.

I don't remember this wall.

Well, that's Ok.

You can't remember every wall.

I guess, but,

parts of this are taking

on a life of its own.

It's running unchecked.

What's driving it?

I don't know,

my imagination?

Oh, please.

No, I can't use this.

This whole place is dangerous,

but it's also

very, very fragile.

It's like a spider web.

Any vibration

and it's there.

It's guarding its home.

What is it doing here?

I don't know.

None of this should work,

but look at it.

It's here.

Yeah, in our apartment.

I'm sorry.

I think we're gonna be

safe in here.

Wow.

It's pretty.

Yeah, I was hoping

you'd like it.

Is that the...

Oh, god.

Our British high society drama.

I just couldn't get the story

to come off the page.

Holy sh*t!

Hey.

- You f*** my wife?

- Did you f*** my wife?

There's no did.

It's just you f*** my wife?

No seriously,

did you f*** my wife?

No did.

What is that?

I... this wasn't my idea.

Oh...

This isn't exactly

the maze that I built.

Some things are just there.

Can we go?

Oh, my god,

you've got to be kidding me.

It's a trap.

It's a trap.

No.

It's a trap.

I'm gonna go, uh, check

the light levels in here.

Yeah, me too.

No, I'm serious, guys.

Don't mess with it.

Oh, my god.

Dave!

I had to learn the hard way.

Is there anything in this maze that you

haven't tried to stick your hand in?

I didn't try, I did,

thank you very much.

You're welcome,

and don't think I didn't notice

your complete and utter lack

of beard, you paper dick.

I had an interview.

Oh, sellout.

I made this for you!

Thank you.

I don't know why you did.

I get plenty of girls.

All the time.

- How much further? Dave?

- Constantly.

- Dave!

- Huh, yeah, what? Sorry.

Can we keep going?

Yeah!

Yes.

We made it.

We're home!

Yeah.

It's growing.

I know, but if we can finish it,

everything will be fine.

Hey guys, I know we're tired.

I'm exhausted!

But we've got this

giant, glowing,

lady-part in there,

and if we can just lead

the minotaur into here,

and then trick him into there,

he'll turn into cardboard.

Right?

And then we can stop him

easily, no problem!

And then I could probably

disarm all of the traps,

and then we can

finish this maze!

Who is with me?

Can we get that interview now?

No.

There's no interviews.

So, Dave,

you know what I'm gonna ask.

And remember,

they won't hear me,

so if you could answer the

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