De-Lovely Page #3

She single-handedly

orchestrated my reformation.

l have to say, the music is not bad, either.

-ls that Cole?

-Yes, it is.

This funny thing

called love

Just who can solve its mystery?

Cole?

You're lrving Berlin.

-Am l interrupting?

-No, l mean, yes.

But it's an honor to be interrupted

by America's greatest songwriter.

-What a pleasure.

-The most publicized, that's for sure.

And rightfully so.

Linda has told us so much about you,

she's left out the most important stuff.

-What would that be?

-Your songs.

l heard about them, but l've never actually

heard one played before.

You were listening to that?

That's a bit daunting.

l need a drink. Can l offer you something?

No, it's okay.

l'm gonna let you get back to your work.

l'd love to hear the tune when it's done.

lt's a real pleasure. A real pleasure.

-Pleasure's mine, welcome to Venice.

-Thank you very much.

-We'll have some fun later.

-l look forward to that, Cole.

I was a humdrum person

Leading a life apart

When love flew in through my window wide

And quickened my humdrum heart

Love flew in through my window

I was so happy then

But after love

had stayed a little while

Love flew out again

What is this thing called love?

This funny thing

called love?

Just who can solve its mystery?

Why should it make

a fool of me?

I saw you there

one wonderful day

You took my heart

and threw it away

That's why I ask the Lord

in heaven above

What is this thing

called love?

What is this thing called love?

This funny thing

called love?

Just who can solve its mystery?

Why should it make

a fool of me?

I saw you there

one wonderful day

You took my heart and threw it away

That's why I ask the Lord

in heaven above

What is this thing

called love?

Bravo, Cole.

You know, Cole, you're spoiling us.

And, excuse me, you're pampering yourself.

You have far too much talent

to waste as an amateur.

And we must do something about that.

l think it may be the most beautiful

love song you've written yet.

Why, thank you.

There's quite a bit of you in it.

What do you think you'll call it?

l don't know, something about confusion.

Dinner is served.

Yes, let's eat.

Thank you for your indulgence.

That was the truth, for the most part.

There was a lot of Linda in that song.

I wish there could have been more.

We are leaving soon, you know.

The tour begins.

l heard.

l don't like it one bit.

l don't know

what l'm going to do without you.

Of course, you know...

it is only a European tour...

and l can travel.

l could mysteriously appear

in certain European cities from time to time.

But you are a married man.

What about Mrs. Porter?

Boris, l've told you...

Mrs. Porter...

tries very hard to want what l want.

Surely not everything.

Whatever l need.

As long as she knows

the rest belongs to her.

And what is the rest?

Everything that happens in the daylight.

Which is why l have to go.

-l'll see you there?

-Of course.

You could have a great career

And you should, yes, you should

Only one thing stops you, dear

You're too good, way too good

If you want a future, darling,

why don't you get a past?

'Cause that fatal moment's coming at last

We're all alone, no chaperone

Can get our number

The world's in slumber

Let's misbehave

There's something wild about you, child

It's so contagious

Let's be outrageous

Let's misbehave

When Adam won Eve's hand

He wouldn't stand for teasing

He didn't care about

those apples out of season

They say that spring means just one thing

To little lovebirds

We're not above birds, let's misbehave

l'm being hailed.

lt's from lrving.

lrving?

-You knew.

-l had hoped.

No, you knew.

Okay, l didn't know

what the show was to be called.

lt's to be called Paris.

And lrving has assured the producer...

that l'm the only one

with the suitable sophistication...

to do the show.

So it seems that we would be

leaving Venice...

to go to New York to do a show called Paris.

We'll go, won't we?

Darling, what do you think?

l know you would like to.

You orchestrated the whole thing,

you willed it into being.

l'm just not sure l'm ready.

Cole, l promise you, you are ready.

lrving Berlin believes in your talent.

He wouldn't recommend you

simply out of friendship.

No, l suppose not.

Cole, it will be a wonderful chance for you,

and a good change for us.

Yes.

Yes, we'll go?

Yes, it will be a big change.

l think we need a change.

l never intended this

to cause a breach between us.

lt hasn't, it just....

Cole, we never had a formal agreement,

we don't need one now.

lt's done.

l can't promise you that.

Just so it doesn't put us in jeopardy.

Or your music.

You really love me that much?

You are the rhythm of my heart.

They're playing your song.

Would you care to dance?

Why not?

They say that bears have love affairs

And even camels

We're merely mammals, let's misbehave

See, true love.

l'm not so sure about true.

Linda played that beautifully.

l think that's when l began to really love her.

All right, Linda, Cole,

smile if you're in love, please.

Didn't that make things

even more complicated?

-What things?

-Your other relationships.

No, why should it?

Isn't that why birds do it, bees do it?

Even educated fleas do it

Let's do it

Let's fall in love

In Spain, the best upper sets do it

Lithuanians and Letts do it

Let's do it

Let's fall in love

The Dutch in old Amsterdam do it

Not to mention the Finns

Welcome, sir.

Folks in Siam do it

Think of Siamese twins

Say hello to Mrs. Porter.

Richard, would you please take my hat?

People say in Boston, even beans do it

Let's do it, let's fall in love

Cold Cape Cod clams

against their wish, do it

Even lazy jellyfish do it

Let's do it, let's fall in love

Electric eels, I might add, do it

Though it shocks them, I know

Why ask if shad do it?

Waiter, bring me shad roe

In shallow shoals, English soles do it

Goldfish in the privacy of bowls do it

Let's do it

Let's fall in love

The dragonflies in the reeds do it

Sentimental centipedes do it

Let's do it

Let's fall in love

Mosquitoes, heaven forbid, do it

So does every katydid do it

Let's do it

Let's fall in love

The most refined

ladybugs do it

When a gentlemen calls

Moths in your rugs do it

What's the use of mothballs?

Locusts in trees do it

Bees do it

Even overeducated fleas do it

Let's do it, let's fall in love

Let's do it, let's fall in love

Let's do it, let's fall in love

Very cheeky. Excellent.

-That's so far.

-Listen to them.

One act down, one to go.

Darling, for you.

God, Linda.

Exquisite.

Just a little memory.

There are no little memories with you.

Patrick, you all right?

ls he all right doing that?

His doctors approve?

Probably not,

but he's got to have a childhood.

His sickness seems to come and go.

Patrick, let me give you

the key to the cartwheel.

lt's all mental.

Keep your arms straight.

Here comes trouble.

You plant it, watch this, ready?

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