Dead Like Me: Life After Death Page #4

Better luck next life.

Those are the words you're

gonna leave your little sister with?

Who worships the ground you walk on?

What are you doing, sweetie?

I'm getting back on Georgia's boat.

My getaway plan

worked to perfection.

Dead at 18.

Are his kidneys compromised, too, Doctor?

Uh, that's what I'm here to find out.

Poor kid.

Quarterback turned vegetable.

It's a fate worse than death.

Oh, I'll say.

You'll thank me for this some day.

Or not.

Die, goddamn it.

Did I say that out loud?

Uh, don't die, Hudson.

Hudson, please don't die.

Don't... Oh, I need a tissue.

Why are you here?

- I just want to see Hudson.

- This is for friends and family only. Bye.

You didn't have

to be so rough on her.

Hudson doesn't even know that girl.

You didn't have to

make her feel like sh*t.

Yeah, well, this isn't about her.

It's about Hudson.

Lisa left work early,

so I had to close up by myself.

Well, that sucks.

How did you get home, then?

Bus.

Honey, I would have picked you up.

You've got your books.

I didn't want to pull you away.

Well, when did you

become so thoughtful?

A boy at school almost died today.

Hit and run.

Oh, my God!

He's in intensive care.

Did you know him?

- Ow.

- I'm sorry.

Sorry. Um, the buckle on my

shirt just jabbed into my back.

Red, but not bleeding.

Yeah,

I hate this stupid thing.

Now the buckle puts

holes into my back.

Maybe you should take it off.

Maybe I should.

Unless you want to.

Not really.

I mean, everybody knows him.

Hudson Hart. He plays football.

I love you.

Does that mean that you're gonna

take me to the homecoming dance?

Uh, I...

I'm already...

Chill.

You know I wouldn't be

caught at that stupid dance.

But you could still ask.

I know who you mean.

He goes out with that beautiful girl.

Jennifer Hardek.

Oh, guess it's too late

to call her parents.

Why would you call her parents?

Because I know them.

And it's what I do.

Maybe I could help Jennifer.

She's gotta be really freaked out.

Worried he's gonna die.

Yeah.

Reggie, are you upset?

It's okay to cry, sweetheart.

Death is scary, I know.

Even if he wasn't your friend.

Mason.

Mason, wake up.

Mason!

Give me

one more kiss then, Tiffany.

Ugh! Mason, pull yourself together.

Goddamn it!

- There you go. There you go.

- Holy sh*t.

Right there! Right there!

Right there. Right there.

Right there! Right there!

My reap is still alive,

my sister's in love with him,

Daisy and Cameron

are having Tantric sex...

And all is right with the world.

This is like invasion

of the body snatchers.

Roxy, snap out of it!

I did.

Then what do we do?

How do we fix this?

We don't fix what isn't broken.

George, look around.

Look at this place.

Cameron's figured it out.

Figured what out?

That there's no bolt of

lightning coming down.

What are you talking about?

There are no consequences

for anything we do.

Yes, there are.

Terrible ones. Rube said...

I loved that man.

But Rube is not here

anymore to make the rules.

Well, then, you tell me what to do.

Who knows how much time

we have left here, George.

Make hay while the sun shines.

With Cameron's blessings.

Oh, great.

Now Roxy's flipped.

Well, that makes it official.

The world's gone mad.

When the world goes mad,

anything can happen.

Like I get left in charge.

Visa card application? Says you

get a Seahawks helmet on the card.

No. Oh, don't forget,

the purchase orders get filed in

the second drawer, but only after...

After they've been stapled

to the invoice. I know, Delores.

It's only a few more

responsibilities until you're back.

Oh. And if corporate calls,

remember, it's my Uncle Murray

that had kidney failure.

Not too far from the truth.

Aw, look at my big boy up there.

Insists on jumping up to

the highest spot in the room

when he doesn't have the strength

to clean his own bottom after a poo.

You're a wonder.

A dentist in our building.

$50 off teeth whitening.

- No.

- It says they use a laser to do it

and it's the next big thing.

Yeah, my behind

is the next big thing.

Burial at sea, taxidermy, cremation?

Hey, give me that.

Why?

I don't

want Murray to know.

What, you don't think

he knows he's dying?

He'll be so busy living,

he won't even see it coming.

And neither will I.

Why? What are you two gonna do?

Everything.

Get laid?

I hear Ryan's available.

Let me see that

teeth whitening thing.

This is a first.

I'm the responsible one.

Where the hell is everyone?

- When I was alive...

- Thank you.

... I was never a defender

of following the rules.

Rule breakers were

usually considered kind of cool.

And I wanted to be cool,

so I broke a lot of rules.

If I got caught,

I got punished. No big deal.

In death, the rules are unclear.

And if you break them,

the consequences are murkier.

As a reaper, we are

supposed to take souls

and lead them to their lights,

but what if we don't?

We aren't supposed to

interfere with the living world,

but what if we do?

What are the consequences

of breaking rules?

Who knows,

until someone breaks them?

Will she be getting

a medal, Commissioner Cusek?

At least one.

- Anything to add, Officer?

- I was just doing my job.

Don't be modest.

Come on, give us the details.

I was at the right place

at the right time.

No, you don't. No, you don't!

Get back in there!

- Call 911!

- Right away!

You are not gonna die on me.

- You hear me?

- Let go of me, lady!

Throw me back in the water!

Witnesses say he looked dead

but that you wouldn't

give up on the CPR.

I might have cracked

a few ribs,

but I just felt like

I could bring him back to life.

Right here, Roxy.

Sh*t.

- Hello.

- Hello.

Are you Otto Zien?

Yes. How did you know my name?

I got friends in high places.

On the floor, now! Down!

Excuse me.

I think I'll take that.

That really bloody hurt!

You can't kill a dead guy, mate.

Motherf***er!

Money.

Thank you.

Hello.

Excuse me. Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Clean hospital is a happy hospital.

Well, it's such a short run, Daisy.

I want to do every performance.

Well, how about, um, you know,

just a teensy, weensy

little Wednesday matinee?

You know, nothing but

a bunch of blue hairs.

I don't think so. Sorry. No offense.

None taken.

And if we fail,

then screw

your courage to the sticking-post.

It's "sticking-place."

That's what I said!

How do I look?

Deadly.

I'm on.

- Thank you.

- Yeah.

- You're welcome.

- Thank you.

No, I didn't!

I specifically said

I wanted the report by 3:00!

You did not. You said 5:00.

Amy! Just admit

that you f***ed up!

Delores would never

talk to anyone that way.

Yeah? Well, maybe she should.

Maybe it would make things run

a little more smoothly around here.

I quit!

Well, if I had known

it was gonna be that easy,

I would have

yelled at you a lot sooner!

What are you all looking at?

Geronimo!

Let's go, Murray!

Talk about free-falling.

While Delores and Murray were

free-falling through space,

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