Defending Your Life Page #2

Synopsis: Yuppie Daniel Miller is killed in a car accident and goes to Judgment City, a waiting room for the afterlife. During the day, he must prove in a courtroom-style process that he successfully overcame his fears (a hard task, given the pitiful life we are shown); at night, he falls in love with Julia, the only other young person in town. Nights are a time of hedonistic pleasure, since you can (for instance) eat all you want without getting fat.
Genre: Comedy, Drama, Fantasy
Director(s): Albert Brooks
Production: Warner Home Video
  5 nominations.
 
IMDB:
7.3
Rotten Tomatoes:
97%
PG
Year:
1991
112 min
4,557 Views


Was this made for somebody else?

No, just for you.

That fast?

Fast and delicious. Eat all you want.

-Delicious.

-That's nice.

A red tram is leaving right now

that will get you into town by 11:00.

To make sure you're on time,

you should leave now.

These are the best eggs I ever had.

Of course.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome

to the lnner City Transport System.

Please remain seated

until the tram comes to a full stop.

Never exit the tram once it's moving...

...because of the electronic field

surrounding the moving vehicle.

So young. AIDS?

Car accident.

Oh, my God!

-But you feel okay now, don't you?

-Yes, I do.

Me, too.

Isn't it amazing? ls this what you thought

it would be? I certainly didn't.

I don't know what it is yet. Do you?

No, I guess I don't.

You make me think of my little poodle.

Do you have a dog?

I did have a dog.

I'll tell you about my dog.

I had a little...

-Have you got a while?

-Yeah, go ahead.

They let us on the train in those days.

We didn't have to put him in baggage.

Every time the conductor came around,

he knew it.

And he would crawl down

in the corner of the bag.

-Did you have a dog?

-You asked me that twice.

-What did you say?

-Yes.

-What did I say?

-It's wonderful.

Well, it is.

Mr. Miller, welcome. I'm Helen,

one of Mr. Diamond's assistants.

Come with me, please.

-Looks familiar, right?

-I was just thinking that.

It was designed to be as stress-free

for you folks as possible.

If we can do anything to make it

more like Earth, we have suggestion boxes.

We'd like your opinion.

If you want to make it more like Earth,

you should build some mini-malls.

It's funny you should say that.

Six just opened up outside of town.

I hear they're lovely.

I never go because I don't like yogurt

and I do my own nails.

Mr. Diamond will be with you shortly.

Daniel, Bob Diamond.

Come in.

How are you?

Sit down, my friend.

What's wrong?

You look good in that tupa.

Some people don't, but you do.

It's flattering to you.

So, is this what you thought it would be?

Thought what would be?

Where am l? Heaven?

No, it isn't heaven.

-Is it hell?

-No, it isn't hell either.

Actually, there is no hell. But I hear

Los Angeles is getting pretty close.

Daniel, let me tell you what's going on.

When you're born into this universe,

you're in it for a long time.

You have many different lifetimes.

After each one...

...there's an examining period,

which you're in now.

Every second of every lifetime

is recorded...

...and as each one ends,

we sort of look at it.

Look at a few of the days, examine it...

...and if everyone agrees,

you move forward.

-What do you mean "move forward"?

-Continue onward.

The point of the whole thing is

to keep getting smarter.

To keep growing...

...to use as much of your brain as possible.

I use 48 percent of my brain.

How much do you use?

I'm sorry?

I use 3 percent of my brain?

Don't worry. Everybody on Earth

uses 3 percent of their brain.

3 to 5 percent.

That's why they're there.

3? 3 percent?

No one on Earth uses more than that?

When you use more than 5 percent

you don't want to be on Earth.

Though your take-out places are lovely...

...there are more exciting destinations

for smarter people.

Being from Earth as you are,

and using as little of your brain as you do...

...your life is devoted to dealing with fear.

It has?

Everybody on Earth deals with fear.

That's what Little Brains do.

What are "Little Brains"?

That's what we call you folks

behind your back.

Forgive me.

Who are you?

I'm just like you.

I was on Earth a long time ago.

But I advanced, I moved forward.

I got over my fears.

And I got smarter.

Did your friends' stomachs hurt?

-Everyone of them.

-It's fear.

Fear is like a giant fog.

It blocks everything.

Real feelings, true happiness, real joy.

They can't get through that fog.

But you lift it...

...and you're in for the ride of your life.

God, my 3 percent is swimming.

-What are you reading?

-You wouldn't understand.

Just numbers.

-You read numbers?

-Yes, sir.

I'm on trial for being afraid?

First, I don't like to call it a "trial."

Second, yes.

-What happens if I'm guilty?

-Don't think "innocent" or "guilty."

Worse comes to worse,

you'll go back to Earth and try again.

You keep going back until you get it right?

Not forever.

Eventually, they'll throw you away.

-Have I been to Earth before?

-Yeah.

-How many times?

-Approaching 20.

-Is that a lot?

-I was there six.

My God! So I'm the dunce of the Universe.

We've had people

who have been there 100 times.

I wouldn't want them as friends,

but we've seen them.

If you're defending me,

is there a prosecutor?

Damn good one. Lena Foster.

We call her "The Dragon Lady."

That's our prosecutor?

-Who does she work for?

-The Universe.

The Universe is like a big machine,

and we are parts.

If a bad part gets through

before it's ready...

...the whole machine breaks down.

We're here to make sure you're ready.

-What do they look at exactly?

-I can't tell you that exactly.

But I can tell you

it's nine days from your life.

Nine days.

So my trial goes on for nine days?

No. All the trials last four days.

We look at nine days, or episodes,

from your life.

-Tell me which days.

-I'm not allowed.

Is that a normal number? High? Low?

ls that a good number?

You're very concerned about normal.

Kind of cute.

I'd prefer seven, but nine's fine.

Some have twelve.

-Hungry?

-Starving. I didn't have time to eat.

Well, Mr. All-You-Can-Eat, let's stuff.

Come on.

We have about 400,000 residents here.

We service half of the US's dead.

About 2,500 people a day.

Do children come here?

Children don't have to defend themselves.

When a child is taken,

they automatically move forward.

Isn't that nice?

Any teenagers?

Too much trouble. They go elsewhere.

We tried, but they damaged the tupas.

Too rowdy.

How is your chicken?

Delicious.

-What are you eating?

-You wouldn't like this.

What does it taste like?

You're curious, aren't you? I like that.

-Want to try?

-Yeah. Looks so weird.

-Oh, my God!

-Like horseshit, huh?

As you get smarter,

you manipulate your senses.

This tastes different to me than to you.

This is what smart people eat?

So talk to me. Tell me about your life.

You feel you had any problems?

Sure. I had some problems.

Everybody has problems, don't they?

Everybody on Earth.

Did you give a lot to charity?

A lot?

A lot of money. Did you donate things?

This isn't a good or a bad thing.

I'm merely curious.

I'm sure I could have given more.

I gave a lot to street people,

but you never get a receipt.

How much do you have to give?

What's the total?

Don't worry.

Relax.

There was one person

you were really cheap with.

Over and over again.

I wish you'd been more generous with him.

Who?

You.

-I got to go.

-Where do you go now?

You wouldn't understand.

That's not an insult. I mean it literally.

Get out tonight. Have some fun.

Rate this script:4.8 / 15 votes

Albert Brooks

Albert Lawrence Brooks (born Einstein; July 22, 1947) is an American actor, comedian, writer, and director. He received an Academy Award nomination for Best Supporting Actor for 1987's Broadcast News and was widely praised for his performance in the 2011 film Drive. His voice acting credits include Marlin in Finding Nemo (2003) and Finding Dory (2016), and recurring guest voices for The Simpsons, including Russ Cargill in The Simpsons Movie (2007). He has directed, written, and starred in several comedy films, such as Modern Romance (1981), Lost in America (1985), and Defending Your Life (1991). He is also the author of 2030: The Real Story of What Happens to America (2011). more…

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