Defending Your Life Page #6

The suit had an odor

and the odor said $49,000.

I like that very much.

Your nostrils said you were worth less,

is that right?

The process of accepting a salary

is a complicated one.

You don't know all my reasons.

We lived fine on that money.

That money was fine.

If you want to make it about money,

you may. But we're looking at fear.

-What was I afraid of?

-You tell me!

$49,000 is a lot of money!

I have nothing more to say.

Mr. Stanley?

I'm fine.

I can't believe it.

You didn't want to toot your own horn.

Would you like to show something?

I got a raise six months later.

Let us know if you want to show us.

Your Honors, I'd like to present

a compilation of general misjudgments...

...half of them fear-based, half just stupid.

I have assembled 164 misjudgments

over a 12-year period.

Congratulations.

This is so wonderful.

I am looking forward to tomorrow.

I missed you.

Meet Sam.

-Julia told me about you.

-Really?

She doesn't know me.

She could have fooled me.

I heard you had Dick Stanley today.

How'd you know?

Sam uses 54 percent of his brain.

Stanley is a good man.

Quiet, but excellent.

Very quiet.

Julia, see you tomorrow.

Thank you.

We have to go to the Past Lives Pavilion.

Everybody talks about it.

-Don't you want to see who you were?

-Some people don't like it.

You'll love it. They have great hot dogs.

The best hot dogs in town

are by the Hall of Records.

You sure love this eating thing.

To be able to eat all you want,

never gain weight and feel great. Please.

Look at this!

Let's get in line.

Reminds me of Disneyland.

Hope we're tall enough.

On Earth, did you ever feel like

you might have been other people?

-Ever see yourself in a past life?

-Never. You did?

I think so. I think I might have been

a heavyset man once.

Really? I doubt that.

You never saw yourself as anything?

Once I got stoned

and stared into a mirror for two hours...

...until I saw someone who looked Chinese.

But I think it was just me squinting.

Please take the first available booth

on the left.

The show will begin in 30 seconds.

Welcome to the Past Lives Pavilion.

In a moment, you will be asked to place

your right hand on the plate next to you.

An image of yourself in a former life

will soon appear.

When you have seen enough,

take your hand off the plate.

In order to accommodate everyone...

...you will be limited...

...to five past lives only.

Thank you.

Place hand on plate.

What the hell is this?

Elizabeth! Time for supper, darling.

Be there in a moment, Mumsy.

What the hell's going on here?

Come on, then! To the castle!

That's incredible!

Who are you?

I'm Prince Valiant!

Really?

-Who are you?

-Dinner.

I was a prince, I was a whaler,

I was a tailor!

God. It was so incredible!

You were a native?

And a dressmaker. That's all I saw.

That's so weird. You were a dressmaker,

I was a tailor. Interesting. Want some?

You're going to eat the stick, too?

I can't get you out of my mind.

Tell me about it.

The screenings are so tough...

...but when I see you, I instantly feel okay.

That's great, right?

I don't think it has anything to do with me.

It worries me.

You're doing it.

What? What am I doing?

I'm not sure.

But I read that you had to be okay

with yourself...

...before you were okay

with another person.

I feel okay with you.

But I don't know how okay I was

with myself before I met you.

So maybe you're making me okay.

You're not that okay.

I'm okay.

What's the score?

You're losing.

We're tied.

Beauty.

You know,

you never told me how you died.

I don't want to talk about it.

Why?

It's embarrassing.

What could be embarrassing?

I was hit by a bus.

I tripped.

Seriously? You tripped?

On what?

We were visiting friends for the weekend.

Everybody wanted to go into town...

...but I wanted to stay and go swimming.

So I went outside...

...tripped over the chair, hit my head

on the cement and rolled into the pool.

What did the East German judge give you?

Seriously, did you feel anything?

Were you unconscious? Scared?

I was pissed.

You died pissed.

I'm still pissed. I was a good swimmer.

Swimming is only part of it.

You must negotiate the furniture.

In the Olympics,

they're taking that part very seriously.

The Romanians are great at it.

If you make fun of me, I'll get you.

You've already got me.

-What time do you start?

-Early.

I start at 3:
00.

Want to have dinner tomorrow?

I thought I'd start dating others now.

I have my eye on this 91-year-old.

I'll be at the entrance at 5:00.

I'll be there.

If you finish early, come

to my screening room and see my life.

I'd like that.

-Good night.

-Good night.

You'll sleep great.

I have three boxes of candy waiting for me.

Did they give you those chocolate swans?

They're cream-filled.

They're really delicious.

Swans.

I think I'm just getting breath mints.

-Good morning.

-Good morning.

After you.

Thank you.

Now I have no attorney.

That's a very, very nice outfit.

Do you like it here?

I'll make you a promise.

When we're through, if you still want

to know about me, I'll tell you.

But right now, let's concentrate on you.

-Well, look who's here.

-Good morning. I missed you.

-How are you, buddy?

-What do you care?

Stop it.

You think I let you down, don't you?

Where were you? I'm just curious.

You wouldn't understand.

Don't treat me like a moron. Try me.

I was trapped

near the inner circle of thought.

-I don't understand.

-I told you.

Hi. How are you?

Good morning, everybody.

Let's begin. Miss Foster, you're up.

Thank you, Your Honors.

This morning...

...l would like to begin

in the 34th year of life.

Mr. Miller had a speaking engagement...

...to represent all of the West Coast

advertising agencies.

He was to give a very important speech

to the Ford Motor Company.

If he did well, it could have worked

wonders for his career.

Don't make this the end of the world.

May we go to 34-7-7, please?

It's packed like sardines. You ready?

I can't do it. There are too many people.

I can't go out there.

You've got to.

Something has happened to me.

This is way too many people.

I'm having horrible stage fright.

You got to. People are counting on you.

-I'll make a fool of myself.

-No, you're not.

I can't do it. My heart is racing.

I am having some sort of an anxiety attack.

You know this stuff.

I can't think straight.

Listen to me, that's too many people.

I don't want to go out there.

You have to cancel this.

You're on.

Give us a second.

You've got a full house.

It's packed. Let's go!

-You'll be fine.

-Don't make me do this.

Please welcome our speaker

from Foote, Cone & Belding, Daniel Miller.

I'll be right here if you need me.

Your attention, please.

Nothing serious.

We have a gas leak under this room.

We'd like you all to file out.

Be orderly. This is only a precaution.

I would have shown this day

to illustrate just how brave Mr. Miller is.

With all the pain,

panic and confusion in his mind...

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