Designing Woman Page #4

Our first wedding present.

Oh, no, it isn't. It's the second.

- Well, what do you mean?

- Look.

A coffee table!

I don't have to read it, I know.

"You always wanted this table,

but you wouldn't marry me to get it...

"... so, here with all my love.

Zachary Wilde. "

He always wanted me to marry him.

I figured. Tell me, how soon can I punch

Zachary Wilde in the snoot?

- What's on your mind?

- Guess.

You're gonna bite me on the ear again?

Don't you like it?

It's a very strange,

but pleasurable sensation.

Mike.

Surprise!

Surprise!

Surprise!

Congratulations.

Where did you snare the man?

And how? That's what I want to know.

This is my husband, MichaeI Hagen.

Fred Sellers, Marie Dozier,

Dottie Weaves, Florrie Canfield, Mr. Orjac.

My husband.

Ann Ashmond, Jennifer Dean,

Jeff Dowling...

...Pauline Beaton, Sheldon Stevens.

This is MichaeI.

All right, sweetheart, let's get it over with.

Congratulations.

Let's have the whole story,

right from the beginning.

Old-fashioned romance...

Congratulations, darling.

Darling, congratulations.

I can't stick around. I've got a show

in rehearsaI. You know how it is.

Usually I'm a little more presentable,

but I was having lunch today-

That's my monkey!

It was really very amusing.

I spilled something,

and this little Italian waiter-

The pig. That's the one I got Marilla.

I figured if I put on my new suit,

maybe I could join the club.

I couldn't.

I guess I didn't speak the language.

Are you telling me about fashion shows?

- Whose is it?

- Mine.

Here.

Can't get a tumble here

unless you're gift-wrapped.

I see you changed your pants.

Thanks. And you're the only one

who's noticed.

There must be quite a story

someplace in those pants.

A pretty dull one, I'm afraid.

If there's one thing I can't stand,

it's a surprise party.

Listen to them. If I were you,

I'd throw them all out, myself included.

Who are they?

Now, let's see. There's one actor,

one playwright, one composer...

...two actresses, a television director.

And the old bag in the blue dress

is Jennifer Dean, a designer.

The excitable type arguing with her

is Christopher Matthew, also a designer.

Known on his labels as "Mr. Chris. "

I think that's about all.

Oh, yes, and one theatricaI producer.

I liked this guy right away.

Nice fellow. Trim. Distinguished.

I've been after Marilla

to design a show for me.

You think you could talk her into it?

I can try.

Say, in all the excitement,

I missed your name.

Wilde. Zachary Wilde.

Sure. Zachary Wilde.

I felt like taking his coffee table and

cracking him right over the head with it.

My idiot friends stayed till almost 7:00.

I gave Gwen the night off

and cooked dinner with my own lily hands.

I was jittery about Mike's reaction

to the apartment.

I wanted to balance things

with a show of domesticity.

You're loaded?

Just prodigaI. This place keeps me broke.

There was the inheritance from Dad.

It's all gone now.

- Where do you come from?

- That's a funny question. St. Louis.

Miss Brown of the St. Louis Browns.

How did you hear of us?

We weren't that rich.

I didn't. It used to be a baseball team.

I was making a joke.

It's a shock, you know.

You marry a nice girI out in California.

You think it might be quite a treat for her.

You take the little girI East,

show her the big city...

...let her meet a few people.

Then you find out she knows all of

New York, and owns a sizeable chunk of it.

It's a shock. Bad for the ego.

- Why didn't you tell me?

- You didn't ask.

I didn't ask

if you were a second baseman...

...but if you had been,

I'd expect you to confide in me.

All right, I didn't want to tell you.

Why should I?

I've been shopping for you for a long time.

I didn't want to lose you on a technicality.

You live like this just from drawing

those little pictures? Designing?

Except when men give me $700.

I make jokes, too.

You like this place?

I always thought I did.

I hoped you'd like it, too.

That's why I tricked you

into spending the night here.

And you like designing clothes?

I love designing clothes.

It's a silly, ridiculous business

and it pays far too much money.

And you meet silly,

ridiculous people and I love it.

Not the people, the job.

And what's more,

if you don't like this place...

...let's get out of it.

It's just too much, isn't it?

We'll go to your place.

Or we'll sleep in the subway. I don't care.

If you think you'll worm out of this

on an incompatibility charge...

...you can start thinking over again!

You're not crying?

No, but I'm considering it very seriously.

Now, slow down.

It's not a bad place.

Some people might consider it

a very livable place.

Throw in a couple of rubber plants,

and an autographed Yankee ball...

...and you'd be surprised.

A fellow could be very snug here.

Oh, Mike.

Now, it's okay.

Cut it out.

Everything's fine.

Compatible?

Compatible.

Do you smell something burning?

It's just the sauce...

...for the ravioli.

For a whole month,

we were as happy as birds.

I didn't know anything

about the designing business...

...and she didn't know anything

about sports.

During the day, we lived in two

separate worlds, about five miles apart.

And at night, we made a world of our own.

Yeah, it was a wonderful month.

I gained six pounds.

The fights?

I've never been to the fights, Mike.

I'd love to.

I can't make up my mind which one.

The mill has to know.

They're still on the telephone.

Just a minute, please.

What? I said I'd love to go, Mike.

Where do I meet you?

Try that over the shoulder.

What? Gotham Arena. Fine.

Mike, what do I wear?

What do the other women wear to fights?

All right, I'll figure out something.

8:
30. 'Bye.

Now, let's see.

All right, I'll take this one.

She's decided.

Hello, she's decided on 4-17-X.

If I could have just one minute?

Please, I've got this fashion show

just staring me in the face.

I realize your problem.

I have one, too. A musicaI show.

Bright, witty, modern...

...now highly expensive, since I'm waiting

for a designer to make up her mind.

It's more than just my mind.

What would the store think?

I'm just an employee here, you know.

Besides, I've never done theatricaI designs.

That's why I want you.

You'll be fresh, different.

It needs your high style.

I don't know.

Randy's supposed to put the numbers

in work next week.

He can't move unless he has some idea

what the wardrobe will be.

- Zach, I just don't know.

- I agree with her 100/.

- What?

- You just don't know.

- Randy!

- I love Marilla, I love her work.

- But not for this. She's all wrong.

- Oh, really!

Designing a musicaI show, my pet,

is not done over the weekend.

- You just can't toss it off.

- But I'm not trying-

I have ideas, you know.

And above all, any wardrobe designed

for this show has got to dance.

- Look, I'm not asking to do this.

- Look at this!

BeautifuI! WonderfuI design!

As long as she stands like this.

But can she do this?

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