Destry Rides Again Page #2

the better they like it.

[Applause, Cheering]

All I do

is dine with 'em

And split a pint

of wine with 'em

Respectable as can be

Yet here's what

they say to me

You've got that look

That look that

leaves me weak

You with your eyes

across the table technique

You've got that look

That look between the lines

You with your let's get

more than friendly designs

I should be brave and say

Let's have no more of it

But oh, what's the use

when you know

I love it

You'll only kill my will

Before I speak

So turn on

that low left hook

That look that

leaves me weak

You've got that look

That look that

leaves me weak

You with your eyes

across the table technique

You've got that look

That look

between the lines

You with your let's get

more than friendly designs

I should be brave and say

Let's have no more of it

But oh, what's the use

when you know

I love it

Whoopee!

You'll only kill my will

before I speak

So turn on that low left hook

That look that leaves me weak

[Cheering, Gunshots]

[Cheering Continues]

Quiet! Shut up!

Folks, an important

announcement by our mayor,

the honorable Hiram J. Slade.

Fellow citizens,

our esteemed sheriff,

Mr. Joseph Keogh,

has been suddenly

called out of town

on urgent business.

He'll be gone permanent.

[Man] Yippee!

So it becomes necessary for

me to appoint somebody...

to fill out

the unexpired term.

Therefore, with the power

conferred on me...

by statute number 85-E,

and other statutes

thereunto appertainin',

I do hereby appoint

to the post of sheriff...

that paragon of courage,

that credit

to his community,

the pride of Bottleneck,

Mr. Washington Dimsdale.

[Laughter]

Oh, LittleJoe,

LittleJoe

[Man]

Hooray for the new sheriff!

[Cheering]

Hooray!

What are we cheerin' for?

It's for you, Wash.

You're the new sheriff.

Hooray... What?

That's right, Sheriff.

Congratulations.

As mayor of Bottleneck,

I here and now pronounce

you sheriff.

[Cheering]

Drinks on the house,

everybody.

I set 'em up

and you drink 'em down.

I set 'em up

and you drink 'em down.

I set 'em up

and you drink 'em down.

This is getting

monotonous!

Quiet, everybody!

To our new sheriff,

Washington Dimsdale.

A long life.

[Cheering]

A long life.

That's pretty good.

Wash, aren't you

drinking to yourself?

Oh, sure, sure, sure, sure.

Frenchy, am I really

the sheriff?

Well, sure, you are.

Then I am off the liquor.

A man has gotta choose

between the bottle

and the badge.

[Laughter, Cheering]

Why, he didn't say that...

or did he?

Laugh, you fools!

I'm tellin' ya this town

of Bottleneck has gotta

respect law and order,

or I'll put

everybody in jail.

[Laughing]

The Sheriff's right.

Now you can see why I chose

such a strong-minded man.

[Laughter]

We're all with ya, Sheriff.

If you need any help,

I'll be your deputy.

No need to bother.

I want a deputy like I was

when Destry was my boss.

Why, we handled a much

tougher and ornery a crowd

than I see present.

Why, when we started shootin',

they ran outta town so fast,

the breeze from their coattails

set off a sizeable windmill.

[Laughter]

But Destry is dead.

That makes him

the right man for the job.

Saves us

a lot of trouble.

Is that so?

Well, young Tom ain't dead,

and his father brought him up...

to be the toughest

and fightinest man that

ever growed up in the west.

He ain't got as big

a name as his pa,

but he cleaned up Tombstone.

And I'm sendin' for him

to be my deputy.

And when he gets here...

Destry will ride again.

[Laughter]

Hey, driver, how many times

do I have to tell you...

to take it easy

on those bumps?

I got a schedule to keep.

Pull in your neck.

I'll pull a neck in,

but it won't be mine.

[Laughing]

You just wait 'til

we get to a stop.

[Woman] Oh, Jack,

leave the driver alone.

Trip's almost over.

I don't mind the bumps.

I do. If he

don't take it easy,

I'll blow his head off.

Please don't mind

my brother, Mr. Destry.

He's always threatening

to blow people's heads off

I had a friend once.

His name was Stubbs.

He was always goin' around

threatenin' to blow

people's heads off.

One day, a fella came along

and took him up on it.

Well?

Well, folks say that

now Stubbs' forehead...

is holdin' up

the prettiest tombstone

in Green Lawn Cemetery.

Very funny.

I been handlin' cattle

around these parts

for quite a spell...

and met some

of the toughest

hombres they got,

and I'm still here.

This ain't no ornament.

Pretty good with it.

So was Stubbs.

Meaning just

exactly what?

Well, I just mean

you gotta be careful

who you meet up with.

You know, you got some

pretty peculiar ideas

for a deputy sheriff.

- But they make sense.

- Oh, so I'm supposed

to ride...

in this confounded

contraption gettin'

bumped around like this...

and grin like a baboon.

Well, maybe you should take up

a hobby, like me.

You'd be surprised

the genuine rage

you can work off...

just by carving

a little piece of wood.

Are you sure

your name is Destry?

Folks is always

askin' me that.

Oh, I beg your pardon.

LittleJoe

LittleJoe

Whatever happened to him,

I don't know

Hey, boss, stage is a-comin'!

How far away?

On the upper ridge.

Oh, doggone it, doggone it.

Come here.

Gimme a hand.

Is Destry really comin'?

You're darn tootin' he is,

and when he gets here,

there will be a lot

of folks a-goin'.

Come on. Put that

chair in place.

Here. There's

a nickel for ya.

Jiminy, Wash.

You look like a real sheriff.

[Laughs] I ain't

got time to argue.

[Humming]

Lily Belle? Lily Belle?

What you want?

Coach is comin'.

Destry will be here any minute.

I ain't half finished his room yet.

Where's Callahan?

- Maybe he's in the saloon.

- Maybe? More than likely.

When you see that no-good

Russian lummox, tell him

to get over here.

I'll tell him.

I'll tell him.

Callahan!

Callahan!

How much have

you got left?

I tap you, Callahan.

Please, Frenchy.

I am not Callahan.

Callahan was my wife's

first husband, and he's dead.

I am Boris Alexanderovich

Stavrogin, and I like to be

called by my name.

All right, Callahan,

what do you do?

Deal.

King. Ace.

Can you beat it?

Is my credit good?

No, no, not this time.

Oh, please, Frenchy.

Still want to bet, huh?

Uh-huh.

All right.

Thirty bucks

against your pants.

My pants? Oh, no.

Thirty bucks, huh?

Mm-hmm.

My pants. Thirty bucks.

Yee-ha-ha!

Here he comes, folks!

Stagecoach comin'

around the bend!

Get ready, everybody!

Come on! Destry will be

here any minute. Kent,

you better prepare yourself.

You're gonna meet a man.

Callahan! Callahan!

Scoot on home.

Lily Belle's lookin' for you.

I'll be right back,

Frenchy.

Oh, I won't be here then.

Then we can call it all off.

No, no, no. You make up

your mind right now.

Oh. Oh, what to do,

what to do.

If I leave, I probably

could have won the pot

and if I stay, I might lose it,

and if I don't go

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