Detroit Rock City Page #2

LEX'S POV

A baby-sh*t green, Ford station wagon with fake wood sides

SCREECHES into the driveway. Mrs. Bruce gets out and STOMPS

toward the house. Lex gasps at the sight.

LEX:

Sh*t! It's Jam's mom!

Jam GULPS as if he's just shat out an whole can of Lincoln

logs.

JAM:

My mom? Oh, no! What's she doing

here?

Lex quickly throws a KISS towel over a TV tray hiding a bong,

cigarettes, overloaded ashtray. Trip kicks half-empty beer

bottles under the bed. Hawk sprays Lysol frantically around

the room as Jam shovels gum into his mouth.

KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK! Mrs. Bruce pounds on the cellar window

crouching to see in. She looks like a crazed, underlit psycho.

MRS. BRUCE

(muffled through glass)

Jeremiah! Jeremiah Bruce! You get

out here this instant!

The boys looks up like innocent, wide-eyed angels. Jam waves.

JAM:

Oh, hi, mom.

MRS. BRUCE

(screams)

NOW!

Jam quickly pockets his drumsticks and grabs his worn, denim

jacket off the pile of jackets on the floor, then runs

upstairs. The others follow.

EXT. LEX'S HOUSE/FRONT PORCH - NIGHT

The front door opens. Jam steps out to greet his mom with a

nervous smile. Hawk, Lex, and Trip stand at a safe distance

in the foyer behind him.

JAM:

What's up?

Mrs. Bruce grabs her son by the ear and holds up the KISS

LOVE GUN record waving it in his face.

MRS. BRUCE

The devil's body count, that's what's

up! Don't you know what KISS stands

for? "Knights in Satan's Service!"

She hauls Jam across the lawn. Hawk, Lex, and Trip step onto

the porch looking on in sympathetic embarrassment. Mrs. Bruce

stuffs the record in the trash can then throws Jam in the

front seat. SCREECH, the station wagon pulls away.

TRIP:

Jam has yet to do an overnight with

us.

LEX:

I had a nightmare once that something

like this might happen. I hope he

doesn't get grounded again. If he

misses Peter Criss's drum solo, I

don't know if he'll be able to handle

it.

HAWK:

Lex, quit trying to always jinx

things. Don't worry, dudes. Nobody's

missing that concert tomorrow night.

MAIN TITLES:

CLOSE-UP

The LOVE GUN album sitting in the trash can. CAMERA MOVES IN

on the round label till it FILLS THE FRAME. The record begins

to spin like on a turntable as CAMERA DESCENDS INTO the little

hole ENGULFING THE FRAME IN BLACK. This LEADS us INTO...

OPENING TITLE SEQUENCE

"ROCK 'N' ROLL ALL NITE" BLASTS the way it's supposed to

sound. The jammin' KISS classic is accompanied by a barrage

of QUICK CUTS depicting KISS mania. TV appearances. Concert

footage. Magazine covers. Comic Books. Posters. Art work.

KISS merchandise, dolls, lunch boxes, clothes, etc.

We see the BAND do their thing in authentic CLIPS FROM REAL

SHOWS. GENE, PAUL, ACE, AND PETER SHOUTING IT OUT LOUD.

The MONTAGE is a colorful, kick-ass kaleidoscope of the entire

KISS phenomena. CUT TO the BEAT of this seminal anthem.

The FINAL IMAGE is the KISS "DESTROYER" POSTER.

END CREDITS:

TICKET CHECK:

INT. JAM'S BEDROOM - DAY

The sun's early morning rays beam through the KISS "Destroyer"

poster taped onto a window shade. The phone RINGS. Jam bolts

upright, his profile blocking the poster. He has just awakened

under the only other decoration in his room: a crucifix.

Still dressed in last night's clothes, a plain black tee-

shirt and blue jeans, Jam leaps out of bed unwittingly

planting a foot in the handle of a Bullworker (a piece of

exercise equipment comprised of a powerful spring with two

handles on either end) whose other handle is stuck under one

of the bed's legs.

Jam runs to a phone on his dresser, drawing the Bullworker's

powerful springs out to maximum tension. No sooner does he

pick up, when he is yanked to the floor and dragged across

it as if tied to the bumper of a speeding car. Despite the

Bullworker pulling him back toward his bed, Jam does manage

to get the phone to his ear.

JAM:

Hello?

The phone's cord stretches taut causing its cradle to leap

from the dresser and WHACK Jam on the head.

INT. LEX'S BASEMENT/BEDROOM - DAY

Hawk is on the phone as Lex and Trip scour every inch of the

cluttered room on their hands and knees searching frantically

for something.

HAWK:

Jam, listen up.

JAM (O.S.)

Hawk?

HAWK:

Just listen up, man, cause we are in

a quandary.

INT. JAM'S BEDROOM - DAY

Jam clutches the phone with his shoulder GRUNTING as he does

battle with the Bullworker for possession of his foot.

HAWK (O.S.)

Are you on the crapper with one of

those antenna phones? Sounds like

you're taking a dump the size of

Butte, Montana.

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