Dogma Page #6

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BETHANY:

Sounds reasonable.

METATRON:

Maybe to you, but I'm a lush by nature.

BETHANY:

I mean about the angel of Death's resignation.

METATRON:

For a liberal, yes, but this is the Angel of Death we're talking about. The

Angel of Death can't be a conscientious objector. The Angel of Death is

charged with meting out whatever justice God demands. So for their

insolence, God decreed that neither Loki nor Bartleby would ever be allowed

back into Paradise.

BETHANY:

Were they sent to Hell?

METATRON:

Worse. Wisconsin. For the entire span of human history. And when the world

ends, they'll sit outside the gates for eternity.

BETHANY:

And what's this have to do with me?

METATRON:

Somebody's clued them in to a loophole in Catholic dogma that would allow

them to reenter Heaven.

BETHANY:

So what? They beat the system. Good for them.

METATRON:

It's not that simple. If they get in, they will have reversed God's decree.

Now listen up because this part is very important: existence in all it's

form and splendor functions solely on one principle: God is infallible. To

prove God wrong would undo reality and everything that is. Up would become

down, black would become white, existence would become nothingness. In

essence - if they are allowed to enter that church, they'll unmake the

world.

BETHANY:

Are these guys that bitter?

METATRON:

No, that's the stupid part: they have no idea what their actions will

result in. As far as they know, they're just going home. Isn't that sweet?

BETHANY:

If this is so major, why are you talking to me? Why doesn't God do

something?

METATRON:

He could. He could blink them out of existence, destroy that church, turn

them into plants. But He'd rather see you take care of this one personally.

BETHANY:

Why me?

METATRON:

Because of who you are.

BETHANY:

And who am I?

METATRON:

The girl in the p.j.'s. Don't ask so many questions just serve your

purpose.

BETHANY:

I'll pass.

METATRON:

I beg your pardon?

BETHANY:

When some a**hole abortion doctor destroyed my uterus -where was God? When

my

husband decided he couldn't be with a wife that couldn't bear his children

- where was

God? Now all the sudden, after all these years of quiet noninvolvement in

my life, He

sends one of His lackey's my way who tells me I should save the world, and

as what -

some sort of test? To Hell with Him.

METATRON:

Do yourself a favor Bethany - do the world a favor: let go of your petty

crap. It's served you precious little in the past, and it serves you even

less now when the fate of existence

hangs in the balance. Don't allow eons of history and life to get blinked

out of being just because you have a grudge against your creator.

BETHANY:

A grudge? Do you know why I work in that clinic? It's my own private way of

saying

"f*** you" to God.

METATRON:

And any other day I'd say that's your business and your life, and enjoy

yourself and goodnight. But this isn't about you - this is about eve~body.

So you lost the abiliry to make life. You're being offered the chance to

play mother to the world by acting like one and protecting it - saving it.

(swigs her drink and spits it out)

But I can't make you. You'll do what you will. However, if you should

decide to stop being selfish and accept your responsibility, you won't be

alone. You'll have support.

BETHANY:

What, more angels?

NIETATRON:

Prophets - although they don't quite get it yet. You'll know them right

away - one speaks, the other listens. The one who speaks - and he will at

great lengths, whether you want him to or not - will make mention of

himself as a prophet. The other one won't say anything, but he'll be

helpful

just the same.

(looks at watch)

I have to go. You'll do what you will, but try to remember that we're

working in a time frame here.

Metatron moves to exit.

BETHANY:

(beat)

Hey.

(Metatron turns)

You work for God.

METATRON:

They tell me it's God. If it's not, I'm going to be severely pissed - what

with all these years of bossing people around on his behalf and

expectorating perfectly good tequila.

BETHANY:

What's he like? God?

METATRON:

(thinks)

Lonely. But funny. He's got a great sense of humor.

BETHANY:

I'll bet.

METATRON:

Look at sex. Sex is funny. One time I asked him why you people had to look

so stupid while procreating. He said if you didn't, you'd do it all the

time, just for fun.

BETHANY:

But we do.

METATRON:

I know. And you all look so damn stupid doing it. It kills us upstairs.

BETHANY:

Sex is a joke in Heaven?

METATRON:

The way I understand it, it's mostly a joke down here too.

And with that, Nietatron is gone. Bethany looks at her drink. A three-man

mariachi band surround her and begin playing Prince's 'Little Red

Corvette'.

INT BETHANY'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

Bethany startles awake. The radio on her night-table plays 'Little Red

Corvette'. She lays back down.

INT BETHANY'S OFFICE - DAY

Bethany sits at her desk, staring into space. A twenty-something girl

speaks, butBethany's not really listening. She's extremely preoccupied.

INT CLINIC - NIGHT

Bethany shuts off the lights in the various rooms. She packs up her bag and

turns on the alarm.

EXT CLINIC - NIGHT

Bethany exits and locks the door behind her. She starts walking.

As her feet tread lightly toward her car, three small shadows move toward

her.

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