Don Camillo Page #3

Goodnight.

- Peppone is an ass. | - And what are you?

What am I? | I don't understand, Lord.

Last night, | when you went to buy the cigar...

...the one you still have | half of in your pocket...

...didn't you perchance | stop and read the message board?

I didn't actually read it. | I only glanced at it.

And didn't you notice | some strange writing?

When I stopped | there was nothing written there.

- I'm being called to the sacristy, | I think. - Don Camillo, wait!

And when you left, did you notice | anything strange there?

Now that you mention it, there was | something written in red pencil...

...on the bottom. | They're waiting for me.

Shame on you, ridiculing a man | because he only reached third grade.

The whole town is laughing at him. | Listen to what you've done.

Peppone is an ass.

Peppone is an ass!

- Peppone is an ass! | - Peppone is an ass!

Peppone is an ass!

I didn't want that. | What should I do?

Who sins must do penance.

- Blessed Mother. - Don't call on | those who have nothing to do with it.

- But she's still your mother! | - Don Camillo!

You judge me badly, Jesus.

Here's my half cigar.

You know | I can't buy another all week.

- Look at what I'll do. | - Very good, I accept your penance.

Get rid of the crumbs, | you can smoke those in a pipe.

- Good evening, Father. | - Good evening, Mr. Mayor.

Not Mayor, just a Christian. | I've come to confess.

God be with you. You have more need | than anyone for His blessing.

How long | since your last confession?

- It was in 1918. | - 1918!

You must have committed | many sins with all your bad ideas.

- Yes, many. | - Come with me.

[Peppone quickly told all...]

[... but the most difficult | to confess was his last sin.]

Finally, | it was me a month ago...

...when you were returning | with the basket of eggs...

...who jumped on you | with a stick.

It was you!

I didn't hit you as a minister | of God, but as a political enemy.

10 Our Fathers | and 10 Hail Marys.

Ego te absolvo | a peccatis tuis.

In nomine Patris et Filiis | et Spiritu Sancti. Amen.

Amen.

- Jesus, I'll pulverize him! - No. | I forgave him and so must you.

Jesus, if I'm a good servant of God, | let me break this candle on him.

What's a candle?

Your hands are for blessing, | not for striking.

My hands are made for blessing. | How about my feet?

Alright. We're even. | But I haven't confessed everything.

But I already gave you | absolution, that's sacrilege.

They're not exactly sins. | Maybe just small errors.

Shouldn't you correct | your penitent's errors?

- It's our duty. | - Good, here it is.

- Citizens! | - Shh!

Citizens, while we salute...

...the glorious affirmation | of our list...

I won't answer | for my actions!

I'll answer, do your duty.

Correcting Red propaganda?!

You'll work on his spelling | which has no political color.

Come here | with your literature.

Here we are.

Good. | But there's one thing here...

...where I wrote: "We intend | to enlarge the school building"...

...you wrote:
"We intend | to enlarge the school building..."

"...and repair | the church bell tower". Why?

- It's a question | of grammatical rules. - Ah!

Lucky for your bell tower | that you studied Latin.

It dampens my hope | of seeing it fall on your head.

- We must kneel before | God's will. Cheers. - Cheers.

Oh, that rascal that's been | writing on your posters...

...I think I know who it is. | I'll tell him to stop.

That would be a lot better for him. | I kept the stick I used that night.

- Goodnight, Father. | - Goodnight, Mr. Mayor.

- Is the Citizen's Center | moving along? - It's coming along.

Lord, they don't have enough | to buy the first stone.

Where did you get | that cigar, Camillo?

Peppone had two. I think | I took it without asking him.

You know he believes | in equal distribution of wealth.

[Don Camillo can go back | to dreaming of his park now...]

[... because he's convinced | that Peppone was bluffing...]

[... and that he really has no hope | of building a Citizen's Center.]

Our comrade Mayor asks our priest | the honor of his presence...

...at the socialistic ceremony tomorrow | morning in Piazza della Libert.

- What ceremony? | - I don't know anything else.

No, I won't go. Tell the comrade | Mayor I don't want to hear...

...the usual stupidities against | reactionaries and capitalists.

It's not political. It's all | patriotic in a social way.

If you don't come, | you don't understand democracy!

- I'll be there. - He said to come | in uniform and bring your tools.

- What tools? - Your pail and brush | so you can bless stuff.

But, but...

Socialistic ceremony indeed!

Comrades and fellow citizens...

...I am happy to place the first | stone in the Citizen's Center...

...soon to rise here | in the heart of town...

...symbol of our will toward action | and social progress.

Amen.

Our dear priest will honor us | with his words.

Dear friends, I would like | to express all the joy I feel...

...and the recognition | I owe to our Mayor...

...for inviting me | to this ceremony. - Thank you.

[Don Camillo lost sleep.]

[How did Peppone find that money?]

[Finally, he thought he'd guessed.]

Do these hooves have the honor | of being the Mayor's?

Would you mind leaving | a worker in peace?

I wanted to congratulate you | on the Citizen's Center.

I didn't have time on Sunday, | at public ceremonies...

...one can never say | what one really thinks.

- You can easily guess | what they'd say. - Not all of it.

Listen brigand, make your | Citizen's Center smaller...

...it costs too much | and there's a more urgent matter.

- Have you lost your mind? | - I'm perfectly all there.

Do you remember | when you were a Partisan?

When you attacked that | escaping enemy convoy?

And that truck you captured...

...the one carrying spoils of war | gold and the division's pay?

And that day that you sent | comrades Brusco and Smilzo...

...to take the truck | and consign it to the authorities?

Poor guys! | Remember how they returned?

On foot... and in bad condition. | Three tanks had attacked them!

- And goodbye truck full of gold. | - What are you insinuating?

Nothing. Just that tonight | I dreamed there were no tanks...

...and the truck was never lost. | - You never change!

- You always try to dishonor us! | - Don't yell, you could burst a vein.

- Poor Peppone, your memory is gone. | Try to remember. - Oh!

This is a fully legal receipt | and statement.

With the capture of that truck, | we earned ten million lire.

It was entirely spent on the people. | No one touched a cent.

- If someone has anything to say, | I can fix them. - So can I.

Priest, I don't think | there's reason to fight.

I don't either, we agree. | 10 million gained for the people...

...that is, | 7 million for the Center...

...and 3 million for a park | for the people's children.

Sinite parvulos | venire ad me.

7 million plus 3 | equals 10 million.

I only ask what is due to me.

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