Duets

[Woman]

Whoo!

Oww!

[Off-key]

I'd fall down on my knees

Kiss the ground

that you walk on, baby

If I could just hold you

[Woman]

Whoo!

Again

- [Whistling]

- Whoa, yeah

lf I could

just hold you

- Baby, you can hold me!

- If I could just hold you again, baby.

Thank you!

All right, Tulsa,

RonnyJackson!

Let's take a short break, and then

I'll be right back with our next singer.

[Country]

Yeah!

Way to go, Ronny.

Looks like you're on your way to Omaha.

I didn't give it

a second thought.

How about a beer, Earl?

- Your usual?

- Please.

Glass of Chardonnay

for Beth.

[Man Laughs]

What, I say

something funny?

No. I mean, sort of.

You people do this

every night?

- "You people"?

- What do they call it anyway,

"karate-okee"?

No. That's karaoke.

- It's a way of life.

- [Chuckles] Some life.

- Can I have another seven-and-seven?

- You bet it is.

Talent like Ronny's brings in about

a thousand bucks a month, mister.

And that's on top of what I make

at the meat plant.

- For amateur singing.

- [Beth] Nothing amateur about it.

A hundred bucks up tonight,

and winning automatically qualifes...

for the grand prize

over in Omaha.

And you, mister,

are looking at the winner.

Hey, from what

I've seen tonight,

I don't see how you can lose.

[Laughs]

Maybe you'd like to pass through

our little contest here, huh?

I don't have the right costume.

[Giggles]

You don't have the voice.

I beg your pardon.

I'll have you know I was in the choir

all three years of high school.

- So sing.

- For a hundred bucks?

You gotta be kidding.

It's not even worth it.

Really? Well, why don't I

sweeten the pot a little bit?

How much you got

in your pockets?

All right.

What the hell.

Might be fun.

Let's see.

Six hundred

and ninety bucks.

Okay.

[Clears Throat]

- You're covered.

- So what are you gonna sing?

- Hell, I don't know. Whatcha got?

- Show him the menu.

- "Joe Cocker."

- Joe Cocker.

All right.

You be the bank.

- Oh, come on, guys.

- Earl, just hold the money.

- Got it? All right? Got it?

- All right. All right.

[Piano:
Rock]

[Feedback]

[Chattering]

Seems I got to have

a change of scene

Every night I have

Strangest dream

- He's good!

- Imprisoned by the way

It could have been

Left here on my own

or so it seems

I got to leave before I

start to scream

Oh, someone

locked the door

And took the key

Hey, feelin' alright

Uh-huh

I'm not feelin'

too good myself

- Uh-huh

- Yes, sir

Feelin'alright

Uh-huh

- I'm not feelin'

too good myself, no

- Uh-huh

Boy, you sure took me

For one big ride

Even now I sit

and I wonder why

That when I think of you

I start myself to cry

Can't just waste my time

I must get by

Gotta stop believin'

in all your lies

Oh, there's too much to do

before I die, hey

Feelin'alright

Uh-huh

I'm not feelin'

too good myself, no

- Uh-huh

- Yes, sir

Feelin' alright

Uh ho

Whoo!

I'm feelin' alright

- Uh-huh

- [Cell Phone Ringing]

[Ringing Continues]

Hello.

Yeah, this is Ricky Dean.

What?

- Oh, sh*t.

- Honey, you okay?

When?

Oh, sh*t.

Uh, where?

Um, I-I don't know.

No, no, I understand.

It's just that...

No, no, no.

I understand.

Hang on a second.

Where am I?

- Tulsa.

- They got a direct flight to Vegas?

Oh, yeah, sure.

They got a regular shuttle.

Uh, I-I can't make it

till tomorrow night.

All right.

- What happened?

- Nothing.

Somebody died.

Of course, not as cold

across Texas...

in comparison

to parts of Montana.

It's all relative, though.

[Continues, Indistinct]

[Alarm Buzzing]

[Buzzing Stops]

Keep that in mind if you're traveling

anywhere from Aspen...

over to, uh,

the Denver-Fort Collins area.

Winter weather.

Blowing snow also.

You could have very light snow

with an overcast sky,

the wind starts blowing around

even when it's light.

That means very poor visibility.

Be prepared for that.

- It's gonna be a cold night.

- [Clattering]

[Airplane Approaching]

I'm sorry, everybody. My plane

was delayed. We rerouted to Atlanta.

- I'm very sorry.

- That's why they invented

airport hotels.

- Right, guys?

- Correct. Right.

- Coffee?

- Yes, thank you very much.

That'd be great.

I've been on the go

since Monday.

I'm telling you, I hardly had time

to eat the peanuts on the airplane.

Okay. I know

I've held you guys up,

and I've got another flight

at 11:
00,

so I'll cut

right to the chase.

Our development guys love

the growth rate in this area.

And the marketing people are incredibly

pumped about labor costs, real estate,

all the potential spin-offs

into the ancillary service areas.

- Is that mine? Why, thank you.

- You betcha.

So, we would like to bring

some of our folks down here...

to look at possible construction sites,

talk about labor costs,

the work pool.

Now we're gonna need your help

with environmental groups,

Iocal zoning boards,

state-level lobby types, et cetera.

Something wrong?

No. It's just, uh...

[Chuckles]

I-I-I'm not sure what

you're talking about.

The park.

The theme park. Uh, Pilgrim Village,

U.S.A. [Chuckles]

This is the Poultry Retailers

Association meeting.

[Laughs]

Oh, gosh. Uh, well, then I must

be in the wrong room.

Wow. I'm... very sorry, guys.

I was just in such a hurry.

- Hey, sh*t happens.

- Yeah, yeah.

Anyway... Thank you.

Thanks for the coffee.

Thanks. Um...

Does anybody know where

the Everglades conference suite is?

Everglades?

This is Houston.

Oh, God.

I thought

I was in Orlando.

Hi. You called a cab?

Why do we

always get you?

[Laughs]

Um, I don't know.

I'll tell you why.

'Cause nobody else

will take these jobs.

Released criminals are not notorious

for heavy tipping, are they?

Ten bucks,

flat rate.

What do you keep

lookin' at, kid?

- Nothing. I wasn't looking at anything.

- Don't give me, " Nothing."

I know who you are,

and you know me.

- You're Miss Gahagan, aren't you?

- Right.

Miss Gahagan, your wonderful, caring,

nurturing third grade teacher...

of the Chatsworth Avenue School.

Look at me, kid.

You're Billy Hannon, right?

- Yes, ma'am. Yes, ma'am, I am.

- I remember you.

You were one of

my biggest underachievers.

[Snickers]

How come you're driving a cab?

Actually, this is my own cab.

I own it.

Well, I own half.

- You own half a cab? Wow.

- Yes.

I'll bet Donald Trump is

lookin' over his shoulder.

You're just bustin'to know

what I was cracked for.

- No, I really... No, I really don't.

- Shoplifting.

They caught me

at the Grand Union...

with a pound of smoked turkey

and two pairs of pantyhose in my crotch.

The bird had one of those, uh...

Goddamn. What do they call it?

Metal things in it,

set off the detector.

Detectors in food stores.

What a society.

And I don't even want to think

of the number of infants...

who swallowed those things

and are choking to death on them.

[Sighs]

What a world.

- Eat a bite of turkey,

you go straight to hell.

- Right.

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