Easy Six Page #2

At 3, crap 3.

Hide away. Hide away.

F***, man, you're f***ing up

the karma here.

Here's 100 bucks.

Why don't you go play

another table?

No, thanks.

We got a new shooter coming out.

New shooter.

Get your bets down,

get your hands up.

Bets down.

New shooter coming out.

Coming out away.

Better has come in the go.

Smart guy.

You're betting against the table.

Coming out,

lucky shooter, coming out.

Nine, we're out on nine!

Place to fight.

Nine will do it.

Nine is the number.

Nine will do it, shooter.

F*** this!

Thanks for that karma, a**hole!

No win on this goddamn thing.

- F***!

- Samantha!

- You know each other, huh?

- We have a mutual friend.

You won a lot of money.

Looking for some place to spend it?

Somebody?

No? Here, I'll tell you what.

You want to spend it somewhere, you

want to go somewhere, let me know.

You should give me a buck.

I can win a lot of money for you.

I feel this thing is going to win.

It's going to hit. Look!

Elvis...

there is somewhere

I'd like to go.

Well, let me take you there.

I got a sweet limo.

It's a1965. Last of them left.

So, what were you playing?

Craps.

Oh, craps. A big buddy of mine,

Jason, is a big craps player.

In Nam, he caught a chunk

of VC shrapnel...

right in the temple.

Doctors wouldn't remove it 'cause

they thought it would kill him...

so they left it in.

Only thing is now he can't get

too close to a magnetic field.

It gives him a big

f***ing headache.

But Jason's a craps player, right?

So he's got to stand

in the middle of the crap table.

- Do you want to ask why?

- Why?

Because each end of the craps table

is magnetized.

So if he gets too close to the ends,

he gets a big f***ing headache.

You look surprised.

Fixes in.

When a table gets on a roll,

the house switches out the dice.

They drop a pair of tricked dice

with metal in it...

make it turn sevens on their own,

and bust the table.

My buddy, poor sucker.

I gotta tell you:

he loses money like crazy.

I mean screaming crazy.

If he knows it's fakes, why doesn't

he bet the house? I did.

The guy's got a big piece of metal

in his f***ing head.

Me, I want to sue him, but I can't

find a lawyer, and he'll resent me.

Are you a lawyer?

Good, I hate those cocksuckers.

You're pretty quiet.

I like that sometimes.

Thinking.

Just thinking.

Are you a vet?

No, I'm not a vet.

Have you ever seen "Rambo"?

- I've heard of it.

- That was me.

- Really?

- John Rambo. It's based it on me.

I was a Special Forces

sniper, in Nam.

70 to 72.

Counter insurgents

behind enemy lines.

199 confirmed kills.

That's incredible.

Then, the war ended. Everything

turned to sh*t. Old story.

At least, you got to sell yours

to Hollywood.

What, are you kidding?

The f***ers stole it.

Changed everything into bullshit.

Sorry.

So... Can I ask you

a question about Elvis?

F*** Elvis.

Don't get me started

on f***ing Elvis.

I must be crazy.

I think I'm going to call you Pack.

Dr. Schmidt just sounds weird.

Something strange has happened

the last couple of days. It's as if...

something has changed.

I think it's good, Pack. Maybe

you're coming out of your shell.

Have a seat next to me.

So, in honor of your first time,

I'll give you Paradise Special...

for the price of the French Date.

That's intercourse.

Yeah, yeah, everything.

Just...

no extra girls, no equipment,

and no Socrates.

Socrates?

Up the ass, you know?

I don't do that.

Neither do I.

You'll do fine.

It will be fun. Just relax.

- I do a very convincing orgasm.

- You do?

So...

if you'd just go

in the wash basin and then...

- You know.

- I'm sorry, I don't.

Dick-check time.

So...

did Tracy Apples passed your class?

Yes. I gave her A minus.

Why?

Just 'cause she's pretty?

What do you mean?

You give all the pretty girls

automatic A's.

Tracy copied her term paper

off the Internet...

and then went around bragging

about it. I couldn't believe it.

You didn't catch her.

Did you know what

your nickname at school was?

Doctor Dirty Jokes, right?

Oh, yeah. They used to call you

"Professor Pack of Sh*t".

So make yourself comfortable.

Just don't get under the covers.

Oh, Christ!

I don't know about this.

Are you going somewhere?

Your orgasm...

Was it real?

Yeah... Sure.

Of course, Pack.

Sally, I don't mean to lecture you,

but what are you doing here?

- I can ask you the same thing.

- No, seriously.

What will become

of you if you stay here?

Look...

Look, you paid to f*** and I'm tired

of chatting, so our session's over.

- I could help you if you'd let me.

- Right.

You could come and stay for a while

until you're back on your feet.

I mean it.

I'd eat you alive.

You really should go.

Your time's up.

Sally...

No kissing.

It spreads germs.

It's a souvenir

to mark your first time here.

It goes on your key ring.

Yeah, I'll trade you.

Well, thanks, honey.

Hello?

Hi, Frank.

Sally, is that you?

- Did Dr. Schmidt find you?

- Yeah, yeah. He did.

Oh, Sally.

It's strange.

He didn't call me and tell me.

But that doesn't matter.

Never mind.

It's just so good

to hear your voice again.

I miss you so much.

I'm going to come home

for Christmas.

Oh, Sally.

That's wonderful!

That's wonderful, Sally.

You're really going to like

your Christmas present.

Sweetheart, forget the presents.

You coming home

is gift enough for me.

- It'll just be so nice to see you.

- I gotta go.

I love you.

I'd like to begin our discussion

of erotic images in Milton...

by starting

with a brief presentation...

matched with selected images.

"But come thou Goddess

Fair and free

In heaven ycleped Euphrosyne

And by Men Heart. easing...

Mirth

Whom lovely Venus at a birth

So rosy, so pink"

May I help you, ma'am?

Yeah. Is Pack here?

In Boticelli's Venus...

of the shell, and the water and this

fertile flowing fag and sexuality.

Hey, Sally!

Who is that?

Why are we running?

Sally!

I have to talk to you.

May I ask you the nature

of this intrusion?

Officer?

We're getting complaints about

girls working out of the casinos.

Donnie, I'm not working.

Oh, really?

Maybe I'll believe that.

So you must be her father,

am I right?

Pleased to meet you, sir.

Actually,

I'm a friend of the family.

Right, of course.

The old friend of the family.

I'm not f***ing working!

What are you doing

for a living now?

I'm a registered hostess in Clark

County, license number HE148976.

Let's see your sheriff's card.

Give it to me!

So you decided

to go legit now, huh?

You're sure you're not doing

any jobs on the side with...

friends of the family.

Hell, no, Donnie,

I wouldn't want to risk my license.

Sally, Sally, Sally, Sally...

...you just stay out of trouble.

.Thanks.

Oh, and,

hey Mr. Friend of the Family...

did you know here in Clark

County you can be arrested...

for patronizing a hooker,

like Sally?

Thank you for

that information, officer.

Don't mention it.

- Rude man. I'm just helping.

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