Easy Virtue Page #7

so much. Honestly, I'm sorry.

Good. Then let's do something about it.

Why are we driving so fast?

The thrill of escape!

You're looking very game today.

Fairest game in the land.

A penny for your thoughts?

It's more than pennies,

I'm afraid, Pinkie.

I don't think I can afford the party

this year.

But the Japanese lanterns!

- No, cancelled.

Had to choose,

Japanese lanterns or the maid.

You're not getting out of it that easily.

My offer of cellar and staff still stands.

It wouldn't be Christmas

without your knees-up.

Oh! This is the first piece of clarity

I've had since arriving. Whoo!

Why can't we live in moments

like these forever?

Why?

Because you've stopped

loving me, my darling!

How can you say that?

Oh, I just open my mouth

and the words come out.

Then let's make a fresh start.

There are so many things I need

to tell you about me. Hard things.

I don't care.

I do.

It doesn't matter.

I trust you absolutely.

# I'll see you again

whenever Spring breaks through again...

Come on.

# Time may lie heavy between

# But what has been

is past forgetting

# This sweet memory

# Throughout my life will come to me

# Though the world may go awry... #

Shot!

John!

Top hole.

- Oh!

I can't decide which is worse,

that you had to sneak outside

to get some privacy,

or that you were caught by Veronica.

Who's Veronica?

I am. It's my name.

I fail to see the humour in it!

- No, darling, you're quite right.

I can certainly see the serious

implications. It's not a laughing matter.

It's only a laughing matter.

Indecent exposure is illegal.

Even in America.

Yep, yep...

You're right.

And we're very, very sorry, aren't we?

No, I'm not. This is my husband.

- And this is my home!

Maybe it's time for them

to fly the nest?

Certainly not. They will stay put

and brazen this out.

And you can get that ghastly painting

out of my house!

We do not need any more reminders

of your easy virtue!

Excited, Furber?

- Overwhelmed, sir.

Miss Hilda...

- Uncle George... How explosive!

Furber, I recognise that as asparagus.

Correct, Madam.

Ha! I pity poor Panda.

- Oh, what is it now?

Read! "The Detroit News".

Uncle George is a super sleuth!

Collecting old newspapers is

the last refuge of a truly boring man.

Boring? Far from it. It was a scandal!

Wasn't it... Mrs Morley?

Mrs Tom Morley of Detroit, Michigan.

Don't be grotesque, Hilda.

Well, I suppose I'd better finish

my meal before it wilts entirely.

Any dressing?

- Oh, I am genuinely shocked!

No thanks, I always end up wearing it.

- We've been hoodwinked!

Especially that runny vinaigrette.

- Fire and brimstone!

Mayonnaise has more ballast.

Will you stop this insulting behaviour

immediately?

Oh, I always hated that photo of myself.

Of everything I ever

expected, nothing prepared me for this.

For what?

- She was charged with murder.

I was acquitted.

- And that's consolation?

I told you my husband died.

- But you didn't tell us how, did you?

Does John know about this?

I see...

- It's no concern of ours.

Father! Really!

Yes, and after Hilda went

to all that trouble digging it up.

I'm going outside for a cigarette.

Care to join me?

Thank you, Jim. Don't mind if I do.

No concern?

The pack's closing.

This woman has taken advantage

of our son!

He'd never have married her

if he'd known.

You know that, do you?

- You'd have preferred we had an affair?

It would've been more appropriate!

- Mother!

Unfortunately, I agree with you!

- It's easy to talk like this now.

It isn't easy, it's heartbreaking.

I love John, but it's not blind love.

Marion, does that sound

indicate contempt or asthma?

You can't palm us off like that,

Mrs Morley.

This is your doing.

You're a bigger fool than you look.

Larita is your type,

isn't she, Father?

That is the nicest thing

any of you have ever said.

Hello, are we having a picnic?

John... I think your wife better unveil

this one herself. Don't you, Larita?

Before we met...

...I was involved in a court case

over the death of my husband.

It was seedy and stressful,

but since I was found innocent

I didn't think it necessary

to burden you with the details.

Innocent?

She was responsible

for a man killing himself!

The verdict was suicide

but that's not where it started.

I thought it was cancer.

It was...

But he was so desperately sick.

If you'd known him, you would've

understood how forgivable it was.

It's not as if she poisoned him.

- That's what everyone thinks.

She's a black widow.

- I pity you, Marion.

Really? Well, I won't let you!

Right, that's it! You have a dance

to organise, I suggest you all get to it!

Now!

Hilda! Come on, inside!

John...

Are you crying

because you're angry or ashamed?

Neither.

Coming here has been the most

demoralising experience of my life.

Why didn't you tell me?

I wanted to,

everything just happened so fast.

That's not good enough.

I tried to, several times.

But you trusted me..."absolutely".

And you saw the field day

those fatuous hypocrites made of it.

Please remember they're my family.

I shouldn't think of them at all

if they weren't.

Still... you should have told me.

You should have loved me more.

I couldn't love you any more.

You should have loved me better.

I don't understand you, Larita.

I don't understand you at all.

Dancing with you

is like trying to move a piano.

I wonder what the American

will be wearing.

Or who she'll be poisoning!

Do you like long, moonlit walks?

Only when taken by people

who annoy me.

You've got me all to yourself.

Larita's upstairs with a headache.

And which little fool, pray tell,

gave her that?

You ought to see if Larita is coping.

- I already have. She's fine.

It's been a very trying day

for her, John.

Go and escort your wife down.

- No, I wouldn't worry.

You know my wife, she'll make

an entrance when she's ready.

Come in.

Quickly, you'll blow my cover.

Why are you sitting in the dark?

Watching.

People are so universally similar

when their guard is down.

Oh, hello! Ha-ha!

It seems they are universally similar

when their guard is up, as well.

May I?

Thank you for being gallant today.

- You are damn cool in a crisis.

The judge at my trial

said something similar.

Why did you do it?

Why did you marry John?

My first husband was older,

and his end was messy.

Long afterwards, this...

...boy...

...this pure boy arrived

fresh and unblemished.

I married him because

any other relationship seemed...

...cheap and squalid.

My first marriage cost me my youth,

and here I am stealing someone else's.

What will you do?

The best I can.

Oh, Davis, thank you.

And thank you, Pinkie.

- No, not at all, my dear.

Just look at this turnout.

- Hmm...

They've only come for a repeat

performance of the Cincinnati succubus.

May I have the pleasure?

Oh, look!

Tango, please.

- Certainly. Tango...

Dance with me, John.

Lari, don't.

Please? Dance with me.

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