Eat the Rich Page #5

"You're much too ugly

to eat in here."

"But you must let me in!"

"- Please! I know Jack Nicholson!

- No!"

"Get lost, starfucker!"

"- Yes?

- Table for two, please."

"Over there."

"Eat The Rich?"

"Feed the poor?"

"Yes."

"Oh, look up, darling."

"Spider, I've got

some rather bad news."

"Go on, then, surprise me."

"The Russians have ordered me

to defect to Moscow."

"- When is that then?

- I can't say."

"I failed to stop Nosher

Powell."

"Now they're worried that he

might expose them."

"God, I feel so effing

lost."

"Well, don't start

crying here."

"Excuse me, I just seen someone

I used to know."

"- Two more managers with chips.

- We're running out of manager!"

"Blimey, we'll have to start

on the customers then."

"Don't put so much salt

in next time."

"I'd stick to the chips

if I was you."

"Why?"

"Somebody's just

been handed to us on a plate."

"Ah. I see."

"Good grief."

"These people are eating their

way through the jetset."

"You're not coming in here!

Hush up! Millionaires only."

"Incredible. Just incredible."

"It's a bit naughty, isn't it?"

"Come through five minutes,

sir."

"Hm..."

"Are you thinking

what I'm thinking?"

"Paper, morning paper.

Prime Minister missing."

"Paper, morning paper.

Prime minister missing."

"Thank you, guv. Thank you.

Morning, guv."

"How's spying going, all right?

Paper, morning paper."

"Prime minister missing.

Paper!"

"She slung me out."

"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear

that."

"Marriage is on the rocks."

"She wants a divorce."

"Oh, dear."

"You always seemed

the perfect couple."

"Everyone in government

thought so."

"Yeah. You're right."

"They want to take over

the eastern when I'm gone."

"I ain't got no missus."

"Mrs. Powell always struck me

as a deeply romantic woman."

"Perhaps, with the pressures

of government,"

"you may have overlooked

those intimate little touches"

"that a woman of her...

je ne sais quoi craves."

"Why don't you take her out

to dinner?"

"- I can't do that.

- Why not?"

"You know, it's a funny thing."

"But there's only one thing

she'll eat."

"- What's that?

- Mince."

"Anything's possible."

"- Shall I pour?

- Fill her up."

"Well, you've certainly gone out

of your way to make up, Nosh."

"Jewels, furs and champagne."

"So when do I get me front door

key back?"

"Maybe you will,

and maybe you won't."

"Let's see how the evening

goes."

"Are you sure this is the latest

in place?"

"I can't imagine the Prime

Minister wanting..."

"Don't start that

old bollocks again!"

"- All right.

- Oi! Sambo!"

"- What's special tonight?

- Meat."

"- What's he doing?

- Holding cutlery."

"You all right, love?

You look about peaked."

"It's the baby.

Jimmy, I'm having a baby!"

"Oh, blimey!"

"I'm giving birth. Look."

"Any second, I'd say."

"Jimmy, I want to do it

Leboyer method."

"Leboyer? What's that?"

"Natural childbirth."

"No painkillers."

"Just soft light

and soft music."

" Dear little baby "

" You're on your way "

" Dear little baby "

" Have a nice day "

"We're running out of

old customers!"

"- Well, improvise."

"It's a scream, isn't it?

I'm just off to the loo."

"Evening."

"One more push."

"There it is."

"Oh, it's a little boy."

"Oh! He's beautiful!"

"Oh! My little baby boy!"

"What are we going to call

you?"

"I always thought Esquis

was rather a lovely name."

"Yes, that is a lovely name.

Hello, Esquis."

"- It's arrived.

- What's he doing?"

"Sniffing it."

"One bite, that's all I need."

"Oh, sh*t, he's calling

the waiter."

"- I can't bear it.

- Something's happening."

"- What's happening?

- Wait a minute."

"It's tomato sauce, guv."

"Come on."

"Come on, just one large

mouthful for Uncle Spider."

"It's going in. It's in."

"Has he swallowed?"

"Wait a minute, wait a minute."

"Yes, like a 30-dollar blowj*b,

governor."

"Get me the police."

"Here, Mrs. Powell."

"This tastes very much

like human flesh to me."

"Yes, it does, doesn't it?"

"This is the police."

"Lay down your knives and

forks."

"You have all been eating

the Prime Minister."

"Let's go!"

"Quick! Out the back!"

"Hey, you! You!"

"I want a cover-up!"

"I want a complete cover-up

in this whole business!"

"If the press find out that I've

been eating the Prime Minister."

"I lose the election!

I want a whitewash!"

"A complete f***ing whitewash!"

"Mince massacre.

The front cover!"

"- A baby?

- It's a boy."

"A boy."

"A baby boy."

"- A little baby boy.

- Isn't he beautiful?"

"It's my son, isn't it?"

"- It's my son!

- No! You can't have him."

"- He's mine!"

"Cootchie-cootchie-cootchie!"

"- Where's Fiona?

- I'll go back for her."

"Fiona!"

"He took my baby!"

"- Who?"

"Oh...!"

"This way, please, Nosh. That's right,

hold there, Nosh. That's lovely."

"Look, rescue bid pays off. Nosh has

saved the baby from being eaten alive."

"- It's my baby.

- - One more, Nosh."

"- It's my baby son."

"- He's all mine.

- - Aw!"

"- Who's the secret

saucy mum, Nosh?"

"- There he is. The heavyweight champion of the world.

- That's lovely. And again."

"- The next heavyweight

champion!"

" You're playing tricks, babe

And that's a fact "

" Your magic circle

ain't where it's at "

" One moment you were here

and then you disappeared "

" This ain't the first time

that I've caught your act "

" Nothing up my sleeve, babe

"

" Watch out, watch out "

" Magic's what you need, babe

"

" Just like that "

"- Where's my son?

- I... I don't know."

"They... somebody

must have taken him."

"No!"

"- He's mine! I want him!

- Leave him, Nosh."

"- Give me that gun!

- No!"

"No more killing! Please,

Nosh!"

"I've never killed anybody

in my life."

"But I'll kill any bastard

that takes my son!"

"Nosh!"

"I've got to go back.

I want my baby!"

"You can't, love.

It's too dangerous."

"- He'll kill you.

- I'd rather die than leave Esquis with that man."

"I'm sorry, boys. I'm a mother now.

I've got to go."

"- Anarchy in the UK!

- - Don't be daft!"

"Let's think about this

for a moment."

"- We'll all go.

- What?"

"We're going back for Esquis."

"F*** me."

"One shot."

"One clear shot.

That's all I need."

"- You're joking.

- Not this time, Jimmy."

"Stop right there, unless you want a

f***ing arrow through your head."

"It's you."

"A child needs its mother."

"- Who are you?

- A friend."

"- Where's Ron?

- He's dead."

"Ron's dead?"

"- He was shot.

- Oh."

"In the back."

"He's coming for you, Alex."

"Come on, let's go."

"- I'm not coming, Jimmy.

- Aye?"

"You take Fiona and the baby."

"I'm gonna wait here for Ron."

"Ron? What are you talking

about?"

"Oh."

"Go on. I'll be all right,

Jimmy."

"Here. You better have

one of these, mate."

"- No, thanks.

- Go on. Take one, please."

"All right. Thanks."

"The blue ones are best."

"Very kind, the both of you."

"It don't matter."

"Go on! Get the hell out of here, Jimmy!

Go while you still can!"

"The summer's nearly gone."

"It has that nip in the air."

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