Eddie Page #6

Synopsis: Eddie is a New York limo driver and a fanatical follower of the New York Knicks professional basketball team. The team is struggling with a mediocre record when, in mid-season, "Wild Bill" Burgess, the new owner, as a public relations gimmick, stages an 'honorary coach' contest, which Eddie wins. The fans love it, so "Wild Bill" fires the coach and hires her. She takes the bunch of overpaid prima donnas that make up the team and turns them around. But the owner hopes to move the team, now the darling of the New York fans, to St. Louis. He may OWN the team, but it BELONGS to the city and the fans!
Genre: Comedy, Sport
Director(s): Steve Rash
Production: Hollywood Pictures
  1 win & 2 nominations.
 
IMDB:
5.1
Rotten Tomatoes:
15%
PG-13
Year:
1996
100 min
485 Views


- Let me tell you something

I grew up in a one-horse town

in Texas

My folks were too poor to paint

and too proud to whitewash

If I can do it, Eddie, you can do it

Look where I got

It's like we say back home:

"He that would have the fruit

must climb the tree "

So I'm gonna ask you a question,

little lady:
you gonna let me down?

No, I'm not gonna let you down Maybe

with the home court advantage it'll--

Ah, that's my girl That's what I like

to hear Come on, I'll walk you out

Oh, yeah?

Come on, man!

- Okay, now-- Hey! Don't run!

- Go, Knicks!

Hey, hey, watch it!

Hey, hey, calm down,

calm down, calm down

- Thank you I got it

You guys look good

- Thanks

Listen, the players are gettin' ready

to go out They're concentrating

so I'm gonna take you and show you

my office, and that'll be that, okay?

All right, I want you

to be like gentlemen

- We're gonna go in like

we have some class, okay?

- Okay

[ Murmuring, Talking ]

- No problem Oh, my pen

- Here you go

- Hey, Mr Duncan,

can I get your autograph?

- Not now, kids

- I'm doin' business

- Well, they gotta have

something to talk about

[ Duncan ] We're gonna shoot this

rap video at my place in St Bart's

- You know, me, you, the Jacuzzi

- Terry Hastings

- Terry

- Terry

- Excuse me

- Can I get your autograph?

Look, look, $35,000 is not alimony

That's the lotto!

Hey, hey, Mr Patton,

can we get an autograph, please?

Stacy Patton don't sign autographs

You know what, you guys?

Why don't you wait for me outside, okay?

- I'll take you to your seats

and we'll go get some hot dogs

- Mm-hmm

- All right, all right

- Excuse me

- [ Murmuring Continues ]

- Lawyers, agents,

models, pseudo-models

rappers, people with bad rugs

if you're not wearing a jersey

that says "New York Knicks"

get up and get the hell out right now

- Now

- [ Woman ] Ooh! Bye, baby

- [ Murmuring Continues ]

- I'm gonna get up outta here, y'all

[ R-&-B ]

Who the hell do you guys

think you are?

I mean, really--

who the hell do you think you are?

I thought this was

a professional basketball team

Obviously I'm out of my mind

I'm in here with rap artists

and pitch men

line-slingers and "ho" mongers

and a**holes

Eddie, please!

No Knicks, please, Preacher

You remember that people pay

to come and see you guys?

People spend $2,000 on season tickets

up in the nosebleed sections

because they think

you guys are worthwhile

And forget about the little kids

who actually think you guys

are heroes Stupid them!

[ Clears Throat ]

[ Preacher ] Two-thousand dollars

for some season tickets?

That'll make you think

Yeah Homegirl has some shitty seats

[ Fans Booing, Cheering ]

- What are you doin'?

- Come on, Terry!

- Just pass me the ball!

- Get back! Get back!

[ Marv Albert ] I can't recall any

Knick team that has played this poorly

You wonder, is there any hope

on the horizon?

[ Buzzer Sounds ]

- [ Player ] Hey!

Can't you guard somebody?

- [ Player ] I am!

- Boo

- Ooh!

[ Laughs ] You almost got

my karate move

- I've been waiting for you

- Yeah?

- Yeah

- What you need?

- I need to ask you an honest question

- Okay

Was that my loss?

Yeah, there's an old saying:

players win, coaches lose

I know, but seven in a row

It's not like I'm not trying

I've tried talking I've tried being

nice I don't know what else to do

Well, look, Eddie,

we're in a slump right now

I know, but you guys are professionals

You're not supposed to have slumps

We're not supposed to have slumps? Look,

I know these kids make a lot of money

And I know they're not supposed

to be human, but they are

They have problems

like everybody else

But just because they can put the ball

in the hoop, no one cares

Do you care that Hastings' life

is falling apart?

Do you care that Ivan

can't speak the language?

Well, if you don't care

they're just gonna keep on

doing it just to spite you

You gotta understand

something, Eddie

That was Bailey's problem,

and it's yours too

I'll see you tomorrow

in practice, Coach

Thanks

[ Sighs ]

[ Players Chattering ]

- [ Eddie ] Ivan

- [Ivan ] Da, Eddie

Last night you had four defensive fouls

in the first half of the game

- Ivan make defense

- Yes, I know

- Ivan make defense

- Yes, I know

But you cannot continue

to move your feet like that

[ Speaking Russian ]

- Ivan make offense

- Yes, yes, yes

But you're in America now

You need to make American defense

- [ Speaks Russian ]

- [ Players Laughing, Talking ]

A takoi

- A takoi A takoi

- A takoi

Notice the feet

- It's Red Auerbach

- [ Eddie ] A takoi

Nyet! Nyet, nyet, nyet

- We're gonna do it like

we're playing a real game

- A takoi!

Nyet Nyet

[ Speaks Russian ]

- Can anybody drive the lane?

- [ Patton ] Yeah

- Stacy Patton would love

to drive the lane

- [ Players Chuckling ]

I don't know why she want to do this

You wanna play with the big boys?

Mm-hmm

- Aaaah!

- [ Players Gasp ]

- Oh, sh*t

- Good Lord!

[ Murmuring Continues ]

Now, Ivan,

you see what I did?

I planted my feet

That is called

taking the charge Okay?

- Come on, get up

- [ Groans ]

[ Player ] She's gonna feel that later

Nice drive, Mr Patton

- Yeah, try that on me, punk

- You next

Come on, come on Come on, girls,

let's go Let's go, let's go

Good job

Hey, Coach

I didn't think you'd get up after that

I didn't think I was gonna

get up either, as big as he was

[ Groans ]

- Nice charge, Coach

- Thank you

- It took a lot out of me

- Say, boy

Wasn't it nice to have

a real practice for a change?

- Come of think of it, yeah

- Yeah [ Chuckles ]

It was

I gotta tell you, Terry, it seems like

you took a pretty good hit too

Uh, no, this is routine

This is every day for me, baby

I'm not talkin' about that

- Say, Brett, you wanna

excuse us for one second?

- Sure

- What are you talkin' about?

- I'm talkin' about your life

- Oh, come on, Coach

- No, really

I don't mean to pry,

but I'm gonna

Do you still love her?

Well, see, we're gettin'

a divorce, so--

Yeah, but do you love her?

- Shake your head,

'cause you know it's "yes "

- Yeah

So, what happened?

What happened was, I had this thing

on the road in Phoenix last year

I, um, I cheated, and, uh--

See, that's all she thinks I do

on the road now is run around

Well, yeah

I know you understand that

The woman thinks

you don't love her

The first thing you really need to do

is apologize

and keep apologizing every day

Apologize, apologize, apologize

until she says to you,

"Stop apologizing "

And then you have to start apologizing

for your apologies

- That's begging

- Yeah

Begging That has a nice ring

to it, doesn't it?

Begging

Then you gotta

send her some flowers

Okay, so I send flowers,

and then she'll forgive me

Hell, no, she's not gonna forgive you

But it's a good start

- [ Crowd Cheering ]

- [ Player ] Yo! Yo, yo! Here they come!

- On your left, man!

- Hold up, man! Hold up!

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Jon Connolly

Jon Connolly (born 3 April 1981) is a Scottish football goalkeeper who is currently player-manager of Fauldhouse United in the Scottish Junior Football Association, East Region. He has previously played in the Scottish Premier League for Motherwell. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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