Educating Rita Page #4

I just had to tell somebody.

- What's wrong?

- Last night, Frank, I went to the theatre.

- I thought it was something serious!

- It was.

It was Shakespeare!

- I thought something happened to you.

- Something did happen to me.

It was fantastic.

Macbeth, it was. I bought the book!

Oh, it done my head in.

I thought it was gonna be dead boring

but it wasn't, it was electric.

Wasn't his wife a cow?

And that bit where he meets Macduff

and thinks he's all invincible.

I was on the edge of me seat

because I knew!

I wanted to shout out and warn Macbeth!

You didn't, did you?

No!

They'd have thrown me out the theatre.

Macbeth's a tragedy, isn't it?

- Right.

- Right.

Well, I... I just wanted to tell someone

who'd understand.

Rita, I am honoured that you chose me.

Well, I'm sorry I disturbed you.

Rita, wait a minute. We're near the end -

why don't you come in?

- Oh, no, Frank!

- Come on, you'll find it interesting.

In you come, don't worry about it.

This is Mrs White, she comes to me once

a week for an Open University course,

and she'll be joining us

for the rest of this tutorial. You sit there.

Now, erm, where were we?

Ah, yes - tragedy.

We must not confuse tragedy -

well, the real tragedy of drama -

with the merely tragic.

Let's a take a tragic hero,

Macbeth for instance.

We see that the flaw in his character

forces him to take the inevitable step

towards his own doom.

Whereas, what we read in the newspaper

as being tragic -

er, "man killed by falling tree" -

is not a tragedy.

It is for the poor sod under the tree.

- What are you laughing at?

- It's tragic, yes, absolutely tragic,

but it is not a tragedy

in the way that Macbeth is a tragedy.

Why?

Because the tree...

- I wish I could think like they do.

- It's quite easy, Rita.

Oh, it is for you, and them.

I just thought it was

a dead exciting story, Macbeth.

But you lot, you see all sorts

of things in it, don't you?

It's fun, tragedy, isn't it?

All them, they know all about

that sort of thing, don't they?

Rita, what do you do on Saturdays?

- I work.

- Well, after you finish work.

- I dunno.

- I want you to come over to the house.

Why?

Julia's organised a few people

to come round to dinner.

You want me to come? Why?

- Why do you think?

- I dunno.

Because you might enjoy yourself.

Will you come?

- If you want.

- What do you want?

- Yeah, all right, I'll come.

- Will you bring Denny?

- I dunno if he'll come.

- Well, ask him.

All right.

Christ, me customer!

She's still under the drier, she'll come

out looking like a friggin' Muppet!

I was at a house once where they served

chocolate mints with their coffee!

My husband?

Oh, he's an electrician, you know.

There's a marvellous Chinese takeaway

just at the end of our street, you know.

Have you seen Macbeth?

By William Shakespeare?

'Aldershot 3, Southend 2.

'Cardiff 1, Wrexham 1.'

- Are you gonna change your mind?

- No.

What will you do?

I'm going to the pub with your mum and

dad. That's where you should be going.

But we're not good enough

for you now, are we?

'Millwall 2, Mansfield 2.

- 'Port Vale 1... '

- Denny, he invited us both.

Come on, change your mind,

come with me.

You might actually like him.

Oh, might I, actually, Susan?

Well, isn't that actually actually nice?

Well, sod you.

'... Grimsby 3.'

Oh, great!

That's me stop!

Stop!

Oh, sod it.

? But that's OK

? Who needs all that talking?

? Who needs all that walking?

? When we can do

? We can do

? What we want to

? I'm not dreaming of other women

and I love you

? But it's always

? On the way

? I'm so happy that you're so happy

that we're so happy

? Together

? That's OK

? Who needs all that talking?

Of course you could've come.

- I couldn't.

- Why?

I'd brought the wrong sort of wine.

Christ, I wanted you to come! You didn't

have to dress up and bring wine.

If you go out to dinner,

don't you dress up?

- Don't you take wine?

- Yes, I do but...

- Well?

- Well, what?

You wouldn't take sweet sparkling wine.

Does it matter what I do?

It wouldn't have mattered if you'd walked

in carrying a bottle of Spanish plonk.

It was Spanish.

Couldn't you just relax?

It wasn't fancy dress,

you could've come as yourself.

Don't you realise what all those people

would've seen

had you just come breezing in?

They would've seen someone

who is funny, charming, delightful.

I don't wanna be

charming and delightful.

Or funny. What's funny?

I don't wanna be funny.

I wanna talk seriously with the rest of ya.

Don't wanna come

to play the court jester.

You weren't being asked to play that

role. I just wanted you to be yourself.

Yeah, well, I don't wanna be meself.

What's me, eh? Eh? Some stupid woman

who gives us a laugh

because she thinks she can learn,

that one day she'll be talking seriously,

confidently, living a civilised life?

She can't really be like that

but she's good for a laugh.

If you think you were invited just to be

laughed at, you can get out now.

You were invited

because I wished to have your company.

Yeah, well.

I'm all right with you, here in this room,

but when I saw those people

you were with, I couldn't come in.

I just seized up, cos I'm a freak.

I can't talk to the people

I live with any more,

I can't talk to the likes of them

at your house

because I'm a half-caste.

I decided I wasn't coming here again.

I went to the pub.

'They were all singing, all of 'em.

'Denny, looking happy. He'd just got

a few days' holiday from work.

'And me mother, not really on top form,

something was worrying her.

'Probably me dad.

'They were never really

love's young dream.

'Our Sandra, in love.

'Her fianc, about the same.

'And her mates, all of 'em, singing...

'oh, some song they'd learned

from the jukebox.

'And I thought, "Just what the frig

am I trying to do?

"'Why don't I just pack it in, stay here

"'and join in with the singin'?"'

- And why didn't you?

- You think I can, don't you?

You think because you pass a pub

doorway and hear them all singing,

you think we're all OK,

that we're surviving with the spirit intact.

? Together

? That's OK?

'I did join in the singing

'but when I turned around,

me mother had stopped singin',

'and she was cryin'.'

I said, "Why are you crying, Mother?"

And she said, "There must be

better songs to sing than this. "

And I thought, "Yeah,

that's what I'm trying to do, isn't it?"

Sing a better song.

That's why I've come back

and that's why I'm staying.

So let's start work.

Now, big smile in a minute.

Big smile, big cheese, all right?

All in, all in.

Right, here we go.

Cheese!

Great, great. Now, just one more.

Big smile, now, come on there, love.

Here we go.

Great.

- Now, smile.

- Well...

that's the last of you lot off me hands.

Mind you, I don't know why some of you

bother getting bloody married.

Smile! Lovely.

- What's that supposed to mean?

- You're still not pregnant.

- Smile.

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