Enchanted Page #5

Your Majesty.

- Nathaniel!

- Your Majesty?

Nathaniel, here!

Nathaniel!

Finally. Finally.

I'm boiling in here.

- Have you found her yet?

- I'm afraid I haven't, My Lady.

Time is of the essence.

We can't risk my stepson

bringing the girl back.

He shan't, Your Majesty!

I swear it!

No, he shan't. I intend to make

absolutely certain of that.

But, Your Majesty,

how exactly did you...?

...ever end up tasting so...

Mmm... delicious?

Poisoned apples, My Lady.

- You want me to...?

- Don't you see, my darling?

If there's ever going to be

a happily ever after for us...

- Hmm?

- Happily...

...ever after?

Oh, My Lady.

Mmm, yes.

It won't be difficult.

It's just one bite.

That's all it takes.

One small bite to drag her down

into a deep and troubled sleep.

And when the hands

of the clock strike 12,

that precious little pretender

to my throne

will be gone!

It shall be done, My Lady.

- I swear it.

- Yes.

You'll find the girl

at Columbus Circle...

Your Majesty?

Hello.

You little...

Whoa! Hey!

- Pip!

- Sire! Sire, please. I beg of you.

Don't listen to that

insane little vermin.

He's probably eaten some bad nuts.

We should put him down

for his own good.

Nathaniel, please.

Let him speak.

But, sire! No. He's delirious.

He came to tell all sorts of...

Go ahead, Pip.

What is it you want to say?

You watch me. OK?

Nathaniel?

Uh-huh. Nathaniel...

- Nathaniel's glad to have me near.

- No, no, no.

Hmm... Oh!

Oh, oh, oh!

I know this.

- Uh...

- Apple?

No, thank you.

It's good.

Oh, OK.

Ta-da!

You feel you'd die without me here.

Yes. Here we go. Good.

Well, I have to say,

I really think that went well.

There's no reason not

to be reasonable.

Great. We might be in the

neighborhood of a settlement.

Excuse me. I'm gonna

check on your cars for a second.

- Sorry.

- What? What?

She has no driver's license.

No passport.

Can't find this place she comes from.

- What place?

- Andalusia.

- Andalasia.

- Whatever.

I've called every travel agent.

I don't know if it's

a country or a city.

- It can't be a state.

- More like a state of mind.

She told me it's just

beyond the Meadows of Joy

and the Valley of Contentment.

What is that all about?

Oh, my goodness.

Your hair is lovely.

- You're beautiful.

- Well, thank you.

The man who holds your heart

is a lucky fellow indeed.

- You try telling him that.

- I'm certain he already knows.

- Excuse me?

- Are you him?

You are very lucky. Just look

at the way her eyes sparkle.

- It's no wonder you're in love.

- I got it!

Excuse me. I'm sorry.

Giselle? Please?

It's not like that, all right?

They're not together anymore.

- I don't understand.

- They're getting a divorce.

- Separating from each other.

- Separating?

- Yeah.

- For how long?

- Forever.

- Forever and ever?

Shh. Yes.

- Oh, no.

- What are you doing?

- Don't cry.

- Are you crying?

- She's not.

- I'm sorry. I can't help it.

- Is she actually crying?

- It's just so sad.

What kind of an operation

are you running here?

This is so unprofessional.

Good morning, Phoebe.

How are you? It's good to...

If you guys

are trying to manipulate us,

you can throw this whole deal out.

What is going on here?

Who's she?

Uh, a friend. No, she's

an acquaintance, actually.

You begged me to put you on the case,

and this is what I get for it?

I walk in here

and find everybody upset?

And some girl is crying

like we're on Oprah.

I'll take care of it.

Carl, it's gonna be fine.

- What is wrong with you?

- Me?

Yes, you. This whole Kumbaya,

Up With People routine.

- Those people are in real pain.

- Of course they're in pain.

They're separated forever.

Married one day

and the next they're not.

- What sort of awful place is this?

- It's reality.

Well, I think I'd prefer to be

in Andalasia.

- I think I'd prefer that too.

- Get in, please.

I wonder if we might cover

more ground separately, sire.

Uh, you by yourself,

and me with it.

An inspired plan, Nathaniel.

Where do you suppose I should look?

Look, sire! Over there!

Ah! Giselle!

Run to her, sire! Hurry!

Not a moment to lose!

- Giselle!

- I try to do the right thing.

Oh, you've been very nice to me.

Severely punished for it.

OK, look, Giselle?

- I can't help you anymore. OK?

- What?

Here's some money. I want you

to take it. Call your prince.

Have him pick you up,

bring his horse.

Because I honestly,

I just can't handle it.

- Robert?

- Just go.

I'm so sorry.

You have been a very kind friend

to me when I had none.

And I would never want to make you

unhappy or cause you any trouble, so...

...I'll go.

I wish you every happiness.

You have lovely friends.

Would you like to feed

the birds? Just a dollar a bag.

Certainly.

By chance,

have you seen my prince?

He was here.

- Do you really think so?

- Oh, yes.

- Oh!

- Giselle? What are you doing?

- Robert! This is Clara.

- Mm-hmm.

- She saw Edward.

- Oh.

He was on the bus this morning.

- He tried to kill me!

- Great. Wonderful. Thank you.

- Oh!

- What are you thinking?

- You can't just give people money.

- You gave me money.

- That's not the point.

- And she was very helpful.

So, what's the deal,

this prince of yours?

- How long you two been together?

- Oh, about a day.

You mean it feels like a day

because you're so in love?

- No. It's been a day.

- You're kidding me. A day?

- One day?

- Yes.

- And tomorrow will be two days.

- You're joking.

- No. I'm not.

- Yeah, you are.

But I'm not.

You're gonna marry somebody after a day

because you fell in love with him?

Yes.

Yes!

Oh! Ooh!

I don't get it. How can you talk

about loving some guy

- you don't even know?

- Well, I know what's in his heart.

Oh, OK. Great.

This was so yummy.

I didn't know that food

could taste like this.

- You all done? OK.

- Mmm!

- Let me put that out for you.

- What about you?

- How long have you known your Nancy?

- Uh, it's five years.

- And you haven't proposed?

- Well, no. I...

Well, no wonder she's angry.

Hello, nice lady.

You want juicy,

sweet caramel apple, maybe?

Mm.

No charge for the beautiful

young woman.

- Oh, really. It's free?

- Of course!

Today is free caramel apple day.

Tomorrow is free beef... jerky.

Thank you very much, kind sir.

You're welcome, miss.

You...

Shut up.

Most normal people get to know

each other before they get married.

They date.

- Date?

- Yeah. You know, date.

You go someplace special.

You know, like a restaurant,

or a movie, a museum. Or you

just hang out and you talk.

- What do you talk about?

- About each other.

About yourself.

About your interests.

Your likes, your dislikes.

You talk!

You have such strange

ideas about love.

Maybe we should do what you would do.

You meet, have lunch, and get married.

Oh! You forgot

about happily ever after.

Forget "happily ever after."

It doesn't exist.

Well, of course it does.

Oh!

Oh!

I hate to disagree,

but marriages are a success

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