Erik the Viking Page #4

KEITEL:

(shocked)

Oh, I couldn't do that! The Blacksmith's Code says...

LOKI:

Yes yes... of course.... the "Blacksmith's Code"...

Keitel goes back to his forge and pulls out a fresh dollop of white-hot ore. Loki comes up behind him.

LOKI:

If this IS the Age of Ragnarok, Keitel Blacksmith, it is GOOD to us.

KEITEL:

(banging with his hammer)

Can't make enough swords!

Bang! Bang! Bang!

KEITEL:

Can't make enough axe-heads!

Bang! Bang! Bang!

LOKI:

But, Keitel, if Erik ever finds the Horn Resounding... if he ever crosses Bi-Frost, the Rainbow Bridge... if he ever wakens the gods..

Keitel stops smiting the metal on his forge. He stares into space.

KEITEL:

They chase Fenrir the Wolf from the sky...

LOKI:

The Age of Ragnarok ends...

KEITEL:

The bottom falls out of the sword business!

LOKI:

It's not just YOUR livelihood that's at stake but your son's, and the livelihood of ALL blacksmiths.

KEITEL:

(this touches a nerve in his muscular mind)

My brother blacksmiths!

LOKI:

That's right.

KEITEL:

The Blacksmith's Code says I must...

LOKI:

Honour and protect all blacksmiths.

KEITEL:

(as if reciting his oath)

Together we stand!

LOKI:

You can't let Erik do THAT.

Loki smiles. He has Keitel playing into his hands, although Keitel doesn't realize it. Fade. Cut to some days later. The expedition is set to leave. Thorfinn Skull-Splitter taking leave of his mum and dad.

THORFINN'S MUM

And you've got BOTH axes?

THORFINN:

Yes, Mother.

THORFINN'S MUM

And something to sharpen them with?

THORFINN:

Yes, Mum.

THORFINN'S MUM

And don't forget: never let your enemy get behind you.

THORFINN:

No, Mother.

THORFINN'S MUM

And keep your sword greased.

THORFINN:

Yes, Mother. Goodbye, Dad.

THORFINN'S DAD

And don't forget to was - you know - ALL over.

THORFINN:

No, Dad.

THORFINN'S MUM

And if you have to kill somebody, KILL them! Don't stop to think about it.

THORFINN:

(mildly)

I never do...

Cut to Sven the Berserk who is also being lectured. The lecture is coming from his father - Ulf the Maddeningly Calm.

SVEN'S FATHER

(sotto voce)

It's a tradition.

SVEN:

I know, Dad.

SVEN'S FATHER

I was a Berserk for King Harald Fairhair...

SVEN:

You went berserk...

SVEN'S FATHER

I went berserk in every battle I ever fought for King Harald...

SVEN:

So did your father...

SVEN'S FATHER

So did my father and his father before him.

SVEN:

But it's a responsibility...

SVEN'S FATHER

But it's a responsibility being a Berserk.

SVEN:

I must only let the red rage...

SVEN'S FATHER

You must only let the red rage take hold of you in the thick of battle.

SVEN:

(losing his temper)

I KNOW! I'VE HEARD IT ALL I THOUSAND TIMES!

A sudden silence falls, as all the village turns to stare nervously at Sven. He goes berserk and demolishes a nearby hut with his head. Ulf the Maddeningly Calm shakes his head.

SVEN'S FATHER

No no... you'll never make a Berserk. If you let it out now you'll have nothing left for battle...

IVAR'S MUM

Besides... it's dangerous.

SVEN'S FATHER

(gloomily)

It's the end of a family tradition.

In another corner of the village Leif the Lucky is standing with his pregnant girlfriend.

GIRL:

Bye, Leif.

LEIF:

Bye... sorry...

GIRL:

Yeah... well...

LEIF:

You will wait?

GIRL:

What d'you expect me to do?

She takes a bracelet off her arm and gives it to Leif.

GIRL:

Wear this for luck.

Leif looks at it.

LEIF:

That's why they call me... Leif the Lucky.

GIRL:

Please.

Cut to Harald Missionary dumping a bag on board the ship. GRIMHILD HOUSEWIFE

is helping him. Snorri looks at him in surprise.

SNORRI:

YOU coming? You don't even believe in Asgaard.

HARALD:

I thought I might do a bit of business on the way.

SNORRI:

You're wasting your time.

HARALD:

Listen. I've been in this dump for sixteen years and I haven't made a single convert...

SNORRI:

There was Thorbjorn Vifilsson's wife. You converted HER.

HARALD:

Thorbjorn Vifilsson's wife became a Buddhist, not a Christian.

SNORRI:

Same thing, isn't it?

HARALD:

No, it is NOT.

Meanwhile in another part of the village, Loki is strapping a large consignment of swords onto a pony. He glances round and then sneaks surreptiously out of the village, over the barren hills of Norway, under the boiling black skies of Ragnarok. Back at the quayside, GOLDEN DRAGON is ready for the journey. Erik addresses the villagers.

ERIK:

Well... we'll be off now...

Erik's grandad waits for some time before he realizes that Erik isn't intending to say anything else.

GRANDAD:

You need to say a bit more than that!

ERIK:

Oh... er... yes...

The faces of the village-folk turn towards him. There are many moist eyes. Erik's mother starts to cry.

ERIK:

Oh, there, Mum...

(he turns and addresses everyone)

Don't be sad.... You all know why we're going, so don't grieve. Maybe untold dangers do lie ahead of us, and some of you may well be looking at the one you love for the last time...

Someone bursts out sobbing. Erik desperately tries to rally their spirits.

ERIK:

But don't grieve! Even tough the Hordes of Muspel tear us limb from limb... or the Fire Giants burn each and every one of us to a cinder...

More crying.

ERIK:

...though we may be swallowed by the Dragon of the North Sea or fall off the Edge of the World... don't cry.

More crying.

ERIK:

No! Don't cry....

By this time most of the village is blubbering profusely. Cut to Harald Missionary. He has his arm round his weeping girlfriend.

HARALD MISSIONARY

Sh... There... it's all fantasy, there's no Dragon of the North Sea, no Edge of the World...

GRIMHILD HOUSEWIFE

That's what YOU say.

ERIK:

(aside to his Grandad)

What's the matter with them?

GRANDAD:

Just say something cheerful.

ERIK:

Oh... right!

(He can't think of anything)

Well.... CHEERS everybody!

Erik smiles broadly and waves. The entire village stares back at him with tears in their eyes, and biting their lips. Suddenly one mother can't hold it back any more.

THORFINN'S MUM

Don't go!

Another mother rushes out and grabs Ivar the Boneless.

IVAR'S MUM

My son! I don't want you to go!

IVAR:

I don't want to go, either...

ERIK:

Oh gods! Please, everybody! Keep calm! It's not certain ALL of us are going to die... and in any case we may not die HIDEOUS deaths...

More renewed sobbing. Grandad's eyes go heavenwards.

GRANDAD:

(to Erik)

I think we should go...

ERIK:

Right.

(he turns for a last salute)

Farewell... for the last time... may the gods prevent...

GRANDAD:

No, don't say anything else!

Suddenly Keitel Blacksmith steps forward. His muscles ripple. His handsome face radiates heroism and manliness.

KEITEL:

Wait, Erik!

ERIK:

Keitel Blacksmith?

They stop and turn.

KEITEL:

You can't go without me. Who will repair your swords and mend your shields?

Renewed sobs from the women.

WOMEN:

Oh, no! Ah, lackaday! Not HIM too!

ERIK:

What's the matter now?

UNN:

If Keitel Blacksmith goes with you...

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