Escape from Cannibal Farm Page #2

old video I made you watch,

Night of the Satanic Exorcism.

Made you watch it

when you were four.

- Yeah thanks for that.

- You're welcome.

Let's go explore but I

don't want that thing near me.

Okay.

It's good to have you

here with us Jess.

We don't see enough

of you or Kurt.

We just don't

get the time Mom.

That's life, everybody's

money rich and time poor.

Yeah well Kurt and I are

time poor and money poor.

You know we'd help

you if we could Jess.

Oh no Mom that's not

what I was implying.

Since I've stopped

helping you out with money

I barely hear from you.

Is that all you need me for?

Mom don't be so ridiculous.

You know your father and I

met in the city way back when.

Well prices have

gone up since then.

I mean Kurt and I

we barely make rent

and we basically

live in a cellar.

Well it's hard

when you're young

but well it gets a bit easier.

Mom I have been living out

of my overdraft for three years

whereas you have what,

two houses and three cars.

Toby and Sam they're gonna

need to live at home with you

'til they're at least 30.

I don't think Wesley

would like that.

I don't think Wesley

likes much of anything.

He may seem like

a grumpy old man

but actually he's

very kind hearted.

He's done a lot of good for us.

Mom maybe we should just

stay in the motor home.

You can but Wesley

really wants to camp.

That's what we came

all this way for.

Whoa whoa whoa what

the f*** is that?

It's a popup tent.

Where's my tent Kathy?

It's the one I've had

since I was a kid.

It was damp and it was smelly.

Who asked you?

I'm sorry Wesley it

was just really tricky.

This one's so much

easier to put up.

Oh tricky for a useless

old baggage maybe.

Perhaps you should've

left it to the men.

Kind hearted you said?

He just has a

very specific idea

of how he wants

this weekend to be.

Yeah a living hell for us all.

He just wants it to

be perfect, for us.

Oh good fire Wesley.

Oh don't thank me, thank

Mr. Daniels, he got it going

and he gets the

first cut of meat.

Oh no.

Actually Wesley I

don't eat meat.

Oh no you gotta try this.

I cook it rare and bloody.

It'll be the best meat

you've ever tasted.

Better than that dog sh*t

they sell in the supermarkets.

No this is proper

food, man's food.

We're vegan Wesley.

- What?

- Vegan.

What from Star Trek?

It means vegetarian.

No Mom it means no animal

products, no meat, no dairy.

Well what in the bloody hell

do you expect to eat then?

All kinds of things.

Fruit, vegetables, soy

products, special vegan things.

Isn't that stuff a

bit expensive for you?

Mom it's a choice we've made.

You sure you don't want me

to cook you up some grass?

There's plenty of grass.

Oh how about some leaves?

- Wesley.

- Well that's vegan isn't it?

It's all well and

good making fun of us

but there are benefits

to our vegan diet.

Oh benefits, yeah,

what benefits?

Do you sh*t flowers?

When you've got

diabetes, heart disease

and a fat belly you

won't be mocking us.

What?

I'm just kidding.

Perhaps you should just

go and get the food bag.

No it's alright

Jess I'll get it.

You two keep the fire going.

It's in the brown

paper bag by the fridge.

Yeah of course it is.

What did I say about phones?

Hey hey that's mine, Mom.

I specifically said

I didn't want phones,

games, computers, all your

electrical sh*t on this trip.

Give it back.

I didn't come all

the way out here

to have your bullshit

disturbing me.

- You f***ing a**hole!

- Toby.

You gonna let him

call me an a**hole?

An a**hole that pays for

you to go to university.

See this is thanks I get.

Do you know what a

spoiled brat you are?

F*** you, get your

f***ing hands off of me.

Toby that's

unacceptable, apologize to Wesley.

No let him go Kathy,

why do you even bother?

Toby.

- Toby, wait, stop.

- Go away Jess.

But we'll find your

phone in the morning.

I'm not sitting

out there with him.

Well great, so you're gonna

leave me out here with him?

You're not gonna convince him

to give you any money you know.

- You're wasting your time.

- What?

Jess give up the act.

I know why you came

back this weekend.

You want money from

Mom and Wesley.

Same reason you

always come back.

- Toby.

- It's fine, I don't care.

What are parents for

other than pissing you off

and giving you money?

You don't know

how lucky you are.

Look maybe I don't

appreciate their money.

Uni is a con and I'm probably

gonna come out with loads of

debt at the end of it anyway.

Look how you're struggling.

Sometimes I don't even know

who I'm doing this degree for.

Me or for them.

Something for Mom to brag

to all her friends about.

You're doing it for

yourself you dumb ass

and you should really

make the most of it

because before you know

it you're gonna be stuck

in the same roundabout of

working and paying bills.

You've got Kurt though.

Had a crush on him since

you were near eight.

I thought you

didn't like Kurt.

No, that's me just

dicking around.

He's a nice guy, I

think he's good for you.

Good, 'cause I

really like him,

Even if it does feel like

you're going down a dead end

at least he's there with you.

Maybe that's what's important.

Look just don't lock

yourself away okay.

Come and join the rest of us.

I'm gonna watch a movie.

Watch too many movies.

Jess.

Don't depend on Mom and Wesley.

I took those university

fees and ran.

Put them at the

back of your mind

and take control of

the life you want.

That's what growing

up is all about.

How?

So, glad you came?

To the middle of nowhere

with your f***ed up family?

Hey they're my family.

They're alright really.

I know, I'm joking,

they're bearable.

So are you glad you came?

Of course, I get to

spend the weekend with you.

I hope my mom's

alright out there.

She's got Wesley

to look after her.

To keep her warm in

that sleeping bag.

Oh gross.

Maybe we should've

got a tent too.

No thank you.

We'd have more privacy then.

We could do whatever we wanted.

My brother's right there.

They can't hear.

Kurt.

Kurtis.

Let me play with

your rude cat.

Meow.

I can hear everything

you're doing you know.

It's not okay.

Just put a pillow

over your head Toby.

Fine, but if I throw up

it's going over your bed.

Did you speak to your mom?

Brought it up, but

she wasn't much help.

Why not, you told her

about the flat right?

No I didn't.

Jess what else

are we gonna do?

We've got less than a month.

I know I just didn't know

how to bring it up with them.

Unless you want to

move into Toby's old room

you'll have to find a way.

There's someone

outside in the window.

What?

There was face in the window.

There's no one there now Sam.

Oh Sam it was just a

silly campfire story.

No this was real,

there's someone outside.

Does this have anything to do

with the toy I left on your bed?

It's just a toy Sam.

But that isn't a toy,

it's the creepy cider man.

I guess it is just

us and him out here.

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