Excess Baggage Page #13

WILL:

How -- oh, sh*t.

He's working through it, adjusting -- comes back at herjust as tough as she's coming at him.

WILL (CONT'D)

I can live with that.

Ouch -- she didn't expect that -- she recovers fast.

WILL (CONT'D)

Who?

She hits him with a hard, cold stare -- these are the bigguns.

EMILY (CONT'D)

I don't really remember.

She pulls out a cigarette, lights up.

Will stares at it, at her, the implications sinking in.

She blows smoke, a thin cloud growing between them.

Will

Emily?

EMILY:

What, you're still here?

WILL:

No. You're right. I think it's time I go.

He stands stiffly and stalks for the door.

Emily watches him go with a crooked, pained smile.

EXT. JOE'S AUTO PARTS - DAY

Thomas Perkins strolls to the door of the shop, sparinga casual glance for the undercover car outside --

INT. SECOND UNDERCOVER CAR - DAY

A weary detective watches Joe's place, Will's high schoolyearbook photo on the seat beside him, and, unfortunately, the detectivedoesn't know, or care, who Thomas Perkins is, and spares him only a passingglance.

INT. JOE'S AUTO PARTS - DAY

The door JANGLES and Thomas strolls to the counter. TheGerman Shepherd flops its tail against the wall. Joe, behind the counter,glances up, studies Perkins' suit.

JOE (CONT'D)

Sorry, I'm closed.

PERKINS:

Joseph Pogue?

JOE:

He ain't here.

Thomas

Really? Then perhaps you can tell me where he is?

JOE:

Got no idea. You wanna leave a message, though,I'll see he gets it when he comes back.

Thomas slides a fifty dollar bill onto the counter.

Thomas

I would like very much to speak with him.

Joe eyes the money.

JOE:

That's too bad, 'cause he ain't here.

Thomas's eyes narrow and he retracts the fifty.

PERKINS:

Mr. Pogue, you may not want my money, but you aregoing to speak to me.

Silence.

PERKINS (CONT'D)

Perhaps you don't understand, Mr. Pogue. I'm veryserious.

JOE:

I told you, Joe Pogue ain't here.

Thomas pulls a gun (silenced) from his shoulder holster,turns, and shoots the German Shepherd dead.

JOE (CONT'D)

Veronica?

PERKINS:

As I said, Mr. Pogue, I'm very serious.

Joe wobbles around the counter's edge, not quite believingthat old dog is dead.

JOE:

Oh, sh*t, Veronica?

INT. PERKINS' DISCREET AUTOMOBILE - DAY

Will drives, seriously pissed, passing Highway Five Southsigns too fast -- and then it hits him.

WILL:

She's lying.

He jerks the wheel and screeches to a halt on the shoulder-- which gets him an unfriendly HORN blast from the car behind him -- andlaughs, amazed.

WILL (CONT'D)

Man, she is good. Those poor priests.

And then he sobers.

WILL (CONT'D)

If she's not lying, you are about to make one hellof a fool of yourself, William Pogue.

He stares out the window, drumming his fingers on the wheel.Drumming drumming drumming --

WILL (CONT'D)

F*** it.

He spins the wheel and makes a very illegal U-turn.

EXT. RECTORY - DAY

Will rings the bell, shifts feet a few times, waiting. TheRECTORY PRIEST opens the door.

RECTORY PRIEST:

May I help you?

WILL:

I'm looking for Father Douglas?

The Priest studies Will, who's not up to boy scout standardstoday -- in fact, Will resembles a seriously scruffy character.

RECTORY PRIEST:

I'm sorry, he's unavailable. Perhaps you could tellme what this is regarding?

WILL:

No, I need to speak to Father Douglas personally.Could you tell me where he went?

The priest checks his watch.

RECTORY PRIEST:

He should be back in a couple of hours, if you'dlike to come back.

The priest starts to shut the door -- starts, only, becauseWill blocks it.

WILL:

This is urgent.

RECTORY PRIEST:

If it's urgent, you can talk to me.

Will's losing patience.

WILL:

No, I need to speak to Father Douglas.

RECTORY PRIEST:

Then I can't help you.

The priest starts to shut the door again --

Will strong arms the door.

WILL:

Look you, I need to speak to Father Douglas, andI need to speak to him now.

The priest blanches.

RECTORY PRIEST:

Father Douglas is taking confessions.

WILL:

Thank you.

INT. CHURCH - DAY

Will Pogue's footsteps echo, slap slap slap, across thehard floor. It's an intimidating church, but he's not into being intimidatedright now, he's into getting to the confessional. Still -- he genuflectsand shoots a token knee bend at the alter, old habits dying hard.

At the confessional, there's a line. He pauses, less sureof himself, takes his place at the end.

And way up there, at the front of the line, there are twoconfessionals. He studies them.

WILL:

What now?

A WOMAN in front of him turns.

WOMAN:

Excuse me?

WILL:

Nothing. Sorry.

She eyes his wrinkled clothing, before turning a stiff backon him.

Nothing for it, he waits -- receiving odd glances from littleold ladies ahead of and behind him.

INT. RECTORY - DAY

The rectory priest dials an old fashioned, black, rotaryphone.

INT. CHURCH - DAY

Will's next in line. An elderly woman steps from one ofthe confessionals. He plunges in.

INT. CONFESSIONAL - DAY

Will sits awkwardly in the booth. The shade rolls back.

WILL:

Are you Father Douglas?

The PRIEST clears his throat -- a hint. Will crosses himself.

WILL (CONT'D)

Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned repeatedlyand it's been years since my last confession, but if you aren'tFather Douglas, I don't want to talk to you.

PRIEST:

May I ask why, then, you're here?

WILL:

I'm looking for a girl.

Silence.

WILL (CONT'D)

So if you could just tell me --

PRIEST:

Did you say you were looking for a girl?

WILL:

Uh, maybe I should explain --

PRIEST:

Next door.

Will boggles.

WILL:

Excuse me?

PRIEST:

Next door.

WILL:

A girl?

PRIEST:

You'll find Father Douglas in the next confessional.

WILL:

Oh. Uh, okay.

PRIEST:

Unless, of course, you'd like to take advantageof the circumstances.

WILL:

No, I'll just be going now.

Will reaches for the door --

INT. CHURCH - DAY

Will, crimson faced, takes his place at the end of the lineagain. He's getting truly curious glances from waiting confessors.

INT. CHURCH - DAY

Will's first in line again. An elderly woman steps fromthe confessional he entered the first time. Drat! He pretends not to notice,shifts his weight, staring at the second confessional.

WILL:

(under his breath)

Come on, come on --

A WOMAN behind him taps him on the shoulder.

WOMAN:

I think it's free now.

WILL:

Uh, no, you go ahead. I'm waiting for the next one.

She ogles him, before going ahead. He's embarrassed as hell,getting stares, standing there, trying to be cool. A woman steps out ofthe second confessional and he bolts for it.

EXT. RECTORY - DAY

A police cruiser pulls to the curb. As the COP steps fromthe cruiser, the rectory priest Will had the doorway altercation with stepsforward to meet him.

INT. SECOND CONFESSIONAL - DAY

Will sits awkwardly in the booth, relieved to be off display-- until the shade rolls back.

WILL:

Father Douglas?

The PRIEST coughs, a hint. Will genuflects -- stops himself.

WILL (CONT'D)

Look, the guy next door said you were Father Douglas,and I've got to talk to Father Douglas, so you either are or arenot Father Douglas.

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