Faces Page #6

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I picked him up over my head, threw him

to the ground. I broke his collarbone!

You son of a gun. You

- You don't believe me, huh?

- Oh, sure I do.

- How did we get into this?

- How did we get into it?

How the hell do we get out of it?

You son of a

Ah, shoot.

You look fine.

Now, take it easy, will ya?

Okay. But one word

out of him, and I'll

You son of a gun!

All right.

Come on. Let's go.

I said, "I used to do

a little bit of, uh

a little bit of fighting."

I understand you're a pretty big

businessman. Is that right, Jim?

Yeah, that's right.

Stella tells me you're

in advertising and promotion.

Yeah, that's my title.

They think I'm worth $150,000 a year

plus expenses for it.

Ah. Who's your biggest account?

He doesn't believe me.

- Hey, look. Here's a card.

- I'm not interested.

- No, he's not interested in that.

- You buy, uh, brass and aluminum?

Yep.

I buy brass and aluminum.

- Is that right?

- That's right. Case closed.

Hey. Hey, now.

Look, you son of a gun.

You told me in the kitchen.

- Okay.

- [Jackson Laughing]

[Jim]

Hey, uh, you ever hear the one about the, uh...

fag motorcycle driver?

Yeah, I heard that.

Well, how about

the one about the, uh

the littleJewish agent who

"Not necessarily."

I heard that one too.

Hey, why don't you tell him

about that one about "probably"

Oh, come on.

You gave the punch line away.

I heard that one.

- How about the goose one?

- The goose one?

Yeah. The goose that goes down the subway

and gets peopled to death.

The goose that goes down the subway

and gets peopled to death.

[Jim]

Oh, you're too much. Oh, boy!

Hey, did you hear the one about the, uh

the littleJewish carpenter who was so mean

Once a schmuck,

always a schmuck.

That's not the ending I heard.

That joke's old enough

to have a beard.

You're really uncanny.

Oh, boy.

Hey, you said you were in business.

What kind Uh, uh

- He said he was in insurance business.

- Well, I'm in finance. That's a form of insurance.

- Oh, really?

- Yes.

- What do you do there?

- I'm chairman of the board.

- We have one corporation.

- Yeah? What's the firm?

- Investment Finance.

- [Whistles] That's a pretty big outfit.

- Yeah.

- Hey, uh, do you know Stewie Ray?

- [Jackson] He's not kidding.

- I'm not making it up. Stewie Ray.

- Works for me.

- No kidding? Really?

- Yeah.

- He's a nice guy. Hell of a nice guy.

- You do business with him?

- Ah, we talk once in a while.

A firm like mine has to have

a good credit rate. We talk.

- That's very good.

- Yeah.

Enough of business already.

I'm getting hungry.

You been to Chicago, Dick?

- Not often.

- There he goes. He's

He's uncanny with this phraseology,

you know that?

No wonder you're chairman of the board.

Jeannie, you know what chairman of the board is?

He's the man. He's a killer.

Boy, he's got all the weight.

Did you ever tellJean

about the board of director's meeting?

I was just about to,

but I didn't get the chance somehow.

[All Laughing]

There he goes with that

uncanny phraseology of his again.

Boy, I'll bet you're a real murderer

behind that big desk of yours.

Well, I don't have a big desk.

You know, you're all right.

You're all right. You know

I've been a

I've been a road man all my life.

I've been in every toilet in 50 states.

I sort of prefer it that way.

Hey, do you know the

[All Laughing]

[Jim] Hey, you know what? Before

they had planes, they had they had trains.

Now they got these planes that fly [Pop]

Like that.

Four and a half hours from, uh

from New York to Los Angeles.

Four and a half hours.

You believe that?

- I don't wanna talk about business.

- Huh?

I don't wanna either.

I'd rather play a game of billiards.

Do you play billiards?

I can tell by your expression you don't.

I'll bet you're a golf man, right?

- Tennis.

- Tennis. My kid plays tennis too.

Is that right? Tennis?

No kidding.

I got a friend of mine who bought

Don Budge's house.

I know those guys.

You know, Segura, Kramer, uh, uh, Gonzales.

I only play for myself.

[Jim] Sure. Go down,

play a few sets, work off the gut.

Keep your mind

uh, body up with your mind.

I got a kid who plays too.

He's a hell of a nice kid. Smart as a whip too.

- Nothing like his old man.

- Why you S.O.B.

- You're right. I am an S.O.B.

- You are.

Oh, boy. This kid's fantastic.

He runs! He runs!

And he runs for hours and hours.

Summer, winter, snowing, rain.

He doesn't care.

He swims in any kind of weather.

Oh, boy. I'm tellin' ya,

I don't know where these kids get the energy.

You ever see these Ivy League kids?

They all look alike skinny shoulders, sneakers.

I don't know what the hell

you're talking about.

Oh, I don't know either.

- Hey. Hey.

- What?

I I think that Dickie...

would like to be alone

with the young lady.

Oh, sure. Who wouldn't?

I would too. You kidding?

A couple of visiting firemen come in,

cramp your style, step all over your feet, huh?

Listen, McCarthy, if you don't get out ofhere,

I'm gonna call the vice squad.

- Hey, remember. We're the vice squad!

- You're the vice squad!

Okay. Hey, Stella, why don't you give that girl

What's her name?

- Marta.

- Why don't you give her a call, sweetheart?

Then we can get out of here. Okay?

Gee, Dick, how did we get

into this situation anyway?

I'm sorry.

It's ridiculous, isn't it?

Why don't I give you a call Monday?

Maybe we can have lunch

or, uh, maybe just talk on the phone?

- That's a very good idea.

- Good. Okay. Stewie Ray.

Ahh. Oh, boy.

Ah, Stewie Ray.

Hey, come on.

- Oh, Jeannie, I'll call you

the next time I get in town.

- Yes, yes. You do that.

Come on, Stella. Let's go.

Shake it up!

- It's been a real pleasure.

- Nice meeting you.

- Richard, old boy.

- Jim.

- Nice meeting you.

- Right.

- Sorry about what happened.

- Well, that's the way it goes.

- Night.

- Joey.

[Jackson]

It's really been a pleasure.

- You're gonna get a raise, Joey.

- [Laughs] I hope so.

[Jim]

Stella, step it up, will ya? Let's go. Come on.

I'm glad she's not too tired.

I gotta get my coat. Wait.

Come on. Let's go. Let's go.

- Wait till I get

- [Stella] It's cold outside.

- Come on.

- [Stella] Good night, Jeannie.

[Jeannie]

Thanks. See you later.

Good night again.

Good night, Miss Rapp.

[Jim]

Dickie, Stewie Ray, huh?

Stewie Ray!

[Laughs]

- I thought they'd never leave.

- [Chuckling]

"Stewie Ray."

- "You're a golf man, right, Richard?"

- Tennis.

I never laughed so hard.

I was pretty good, wasn't I?

- My hero.

- Hi, ho, Silver!

Shh!

White horse hero.

You get it?

Yeah, I get it.

Ah, Dickie, Dickie, Dickie.

I like you, you know.

I really do like ya.

- Well, don't get serious.

- I'm not.

- Well, don't.

- I wasn't.

Definition of"seriousness":

Noun. Grave or solemn

of disposition.

Yeah, well, I wasn't getting serious.

I'm your friend.

- Well, you know how I feel about friendship.

- No. How do you feel?

Definition of"friendship":

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