Fantastic Mr Fox, The Page #2

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We need to bring about

two percent more in.

Good. Here we go.

A little bit more. A little bit more.

That's good.

Let's just that bottom structure

resettled in.

Let's bring in the side unit.

Watch out!

Try to be careful, you guys.

Don't... don't peel away the bark.

Hi.

- Hi.

He's slightly younger,

but he's a cuss of a lot bigger.

That's just genetics, I guess.

Ash has a littler body-type.

Go!

Watch this, Dad!

Well, well...

Good jump, Ash!

Remember to keep your tail tucked!

Still painting thunderstorms, I see.

Do you still feel poor?

Lesser.

Wow! Wow!

Look at that!

This kid's a natural!

I'm speechless, Kristofferson!

Plus, he knows karate.

Do you think I'm an athlete?

- What are you talking about?

- Well, you know, I think I'm an athlete,

...and sometimes I feel like

you guys don't see me that way.

What's the sub-text here?

Is he praying?

I think that's yoga.

How long is Kristofferson supposed to

stay with us?

- Until your uncle gets better.

- Right, but roughly...

...how long do we plan to

give him on that?

Double-pneumonia isn't even really

that big of a deal, is it?

Lower your voice, Ash.

Who am I, Kylie?

- Who how? What, now?

- Why a fox?

Why not a horse or a beetle

or a bald eagle?

I'm saying this more as, like,

existentialism, you know?

Who am I, and how can a fox ever

be happy without a, uh...

...you forgive the expression,

a chicken in its teeth?

I don't know what you're talking about,

but it sounds illegal.

Here, put this bandit hat on.

Maybe you're a medium.

Take it off for a min.

And don't wear it around the house.

And so it begins.

Do you mind if I slide my bedroll

slightly out from under the train set?

It's hard to sleep in that

corkscrew position.

There's a lot of attitudes

going on around here.

- Don't let me get one.

- No, it's only just that my spinal-cord

Sleep wherever you want, man.

Here, take my bed.

I'll just, uh,

I'll crawl under the book-case.

Who cares if I get splinters

in my ears?

- Never mind.

- Oh, you're gonna pout about it?

Because I've had it up to... here!

With the sad house guest routine.

Good night.

I used to do this professionally,

and I was very successful at it.

I had to get out of it

for personal reasons,

...but I've decided to secretly do

one last big job on the sly.

I'm bringing you in as my secretary

and personal assistant.

Okay!

This is actually kind of a big deal,

so don't just say, "OK!"

- Okay. Well, thank you.

- I'm gonna tape this for my records,

...so don't make a lot of sounds.

Meaning stop rocking.

Master Plan. Phase one.

Side A.

We'll start with Boggis's Chicken House.

Number one.

His only security is a few old

hunting beagles and a low stone wall.

Now a word about beagles...

Never look a beagle

directly in the eye.

- And if...

- Why not?

Beagles aren't so tough.

Yeah? Well, first of all, one of these

beagles has chronic rabies,

...which he's on medication for,

and if you get bit by him...

...you have to get shots in your stomach

for six months.

And, second... listen, I'm

not going to justify this to you.

Just pay attention

and stop interrupting me.

I'm taping this.

I picked some blueberries,

and laced each one...

...with ten milligrams of

high-potency sleeping powder.

Enough to tranquilize a gorilla.

- How do we make them eat it?

- Beagles love blueberries.

Remember:
they aren't very smart,

but they're incredibly paranoid

...so always kill a chicken

in one bite.

One bite, get it?

Are you listening to me?

I look into your eyes...

...and I cant tell whether you're

getting anything I'm saying.

Magnesium.

- Magnesium!

- Sorry.

Pipette.

- Pipette.

- Oh, sorry.

Potassium tri...

What are you looking at?

Oh, no.

Why's your cousin

such a wet-sandwich?

- I beg your pardon?

- What's that mean?

That means I didn't understand

what you just said.

- A wet-sandwich?

- Yeah, a wet-sandwich.

He's too short.

He dresses like a girl. He's...

...different.

Are you a bully?

You're starting to sound like a bully.

Watch this.

You've just destroyed

the whole experiment.

We'd better extinguish this magnesium.

Stand back.

Wow!

I like your ears.

- Mine?

- Thank you! I like your spots!

- Really?

I used to cover them up.

But, you know...

You're supposed to be my lab partner.

- I am!

- No, you're not.

You're disloyal.

A few beagles, as we discussed,

but we're ready for that.

Yeah, but back in the old days,

didn't they used to do a thing

where if somebody saw a wolf, and...

Wolf? What wolf?

Oh, nothing? Never mind.

Here comes the low stone wall.

Not a problem.

What the cuss?

Where'd this giant fence come from?

- We had a master plan!

- What's this lightning bolt?

That could mean maybe this fence

might be electric.

Well, I just hope it doesn't mean thunder.

Because I have a phobia of that.

Watch this.

Beagles love blueberries!

Didn't I tell you?

The master plan's working again!

Now! This is the tricky part.

One of us got to jump

that barbed-wire,

...slide under the tire-spikes,

and flip open the fence-latch.

- Who's it gonna be?

- Not me.

You know who could do this part

easily is Kristofferson.

That kid's like a professional,

Olympic-level...

Why don't we go around that way?

There's no obstacles.

Yeah. That's better.

- I said one bite!

- I'm trying!

I have a different kind of teeth

from you! I'm an opossum!

Give me that.

That's so grisly!

There's blood and everything!

Follow me.

Hey, what's the master escape plan?

Follow me again!

Quick!

Give me that.

Alright. Let's hit the five

and dime on the way home!

We need to make some fake price tags

and wrap these chickens in wax-paper

...so it looks like we got them

at the butcher shop!

Where'd you get this chicken?

I picked it up at the Five-and-Dime

last night on my way back...

It's got a Boggis Farms tag

around its ankle.

Must've escaped from there

before I bought it.

It's Bunce tonight! He's got a

refrigerated smokehouse with

- a hundred geese...

- Woah! Woah!

I thought you said we were only

doing one last big job.

We are, but it's... not done yet.

It's a triple-header.

Let see some hustle!

Coach, we don't have whack-bat

where I'm from. What're the rules?

There's no whack-bat

on the other side of the river!?

No, we mostly just run grass sprints

or play acorns.

Well, it's real simple:

basically, there's three grabbers,

three taggers, five twig-runners,

...and the player at whack-bat.

The center-tagger lights the

pine-cone and chucks it over the basket,

...and the whack-batter tries to hit the

cedar-stick off the cross-rock.

Then the twig-runners dash back and forth

until the pine-cone burns out,

...and the umpire calls "hot box".

Finally, at the end you

count up however many score-downs

...it adds up to and divide that by nine.

- Got it!

- Go in for Ash.

Substitution!

Ash, come out!

You need a breather.

What? I'm out!

What?

I still feel good, Coach!

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