Fantastic Mr Fox, The Page #3

Year:
2009
2,560 Views


Let me finish this eighth!

No, come on. Step out.

Step out. Let's go.

Am I getting better, Coach?

Well, you're sure as cuss

not getting any worse.

Really? You think I'd end up being as

good as my dad if I keep practicing?

Your dad?

Your dad was probably the best

whack-bat player we ever had in this school.

No, you don't wanna

have to compare yourself to that.

Yeah, but I think I've some of the same

raw natural talent, don't you?

You're improving.

Let's put it like that.

Hot box!

- Divide that by nine, please!

Yeah! That's the first time this

kid's ever swung a whack-bat?

He really is your father's nephew,

isn't he?

Not by blood.

- No?

- He's from my mother's side.

Oh, yeah.

What's that stand for?

Huh? It's for...

It's for pep.

Pep? It's a K.

Come on, now!

Look alive! Attaboy!

We're going steady.

What's that?

- What "what"?

What this?

It's nothing. It's just some old trophy

I won for being an athlete.

I'm supposed to cover this book party

at some animal's nest

...in a tobacco field down the hill,

...so me and Kylie are going to hop

over there and give it a whirl.

- Don't wait up.

- What's the book?

Some memoir.

I'll get him to sign you a copy.

Dinner was...

...pitch-perfect.

I spotted a couple of

broken burglar bars...

...underneath the back door

to Bean's secret cider cellar.

- We're breaking into Bean's house?

- Cellar.

- Where he lives?

- Where he keeps the cider.

- Below where he lives.

- Where'd you come from?

Go back to the tree

and do your homework!

- I wanna help you steal some cider.

- We're going to a book party!

And keep your mouth shut about any cider,

because no one ever said that.

- Now get out of here!

- But...

But nothing! You're gonna

get me in a lot of trouble!

Besides you're too little

and uncoordinated.

One, two, three.

Where the cuss does that kid get off?

Can you believe that?

How did he get tipped off?

You think he's going to tell on us?

Before we go any further, from now on

can you give me some kind of signal...

...once in a while just so I know

any of this is getting through to you?

- Was that it? Okay, fine.

- There's another one.

Good. You made it.

- Anybody see you?

- I don't think so.

Here, put this bandit hat on.

I must say, I'm pleased to be invited,

but I'm not sure...

- I should be doing this, Uncle Foxy!

- Why not?

Because I don't like to be

dishonest with people!

Well, just keep your mouth shut,

and it won't be a problem!

Yeah, but I don't think

he should come with us, either.

We're not taking a vote!

You know, one time

this wolf I saw...

Wolf? What's with all the wolf talk?

Can we give it a rest, for once?

- Look at all this. Apple juice.

- Apple juice? Apple juice?

We didn't come here for apple juice.

This is some of the strongest, finest

alcoholic cider money can buy...

...or that can even be stolen.

It burns in your throat,

boils in your stomach,

...and tastes almost exactly like

pure, melted gold.

Y'all are trespassing, now.

Illegally.

Around these parts, we don't take kindly

to cider poachers.

You've aged badly, Rat.

You're getting a little long

in the tooth, yourself, partner.

Bean security, what?

Why you're wearing that badge?

What is it?

It's my job.

How's your old lady doing?

Do you refer to my wife?

She was the town tart, in her day.

Wild and foot-loose and...

...pretty as a mink stole.

Is that true?

Of course, not.

I mean, certainly, she lived.

We all did.

It was a different time.

Let's not use a double-standard.

- She marched against the...

- But town tart?

Shut up.

That was close, Rat.

Be careful.

Oh, I'm as careful as a...

How many jars should I bring up,

Franklin?

I don't know.

Two, I guess.

You drank three yesterday, though.

Alright, take three.

No, two's plenty.

Oh, my cuss.

Is she blind?

I think she might have astigmatism.

Or possibly a cataract of some form.

Anyway, her eyes don't see well.

What'd I tell you?

This kid's a natural, am I right?

It's so good of you to come.

Lovely to see you.

Youre both looking splendid.

How've you been, Walter?

In good health, I trust?

Nathan? All is well?

Wonderful.

Any fox problems?

- Are you joking?

- It's horrible.

- We're miserable.

- He's laughing at us.

- It's humiliating.

- We're furious.

I don't even want to talk about it.

Perhaps we ought to kill him.

- Well, that seems rather obvious.

- He's too sneaky.

Ah, right. Of course.

He's very clever, isn't he?

Might be bit difficult, I suppose.

But I've already figured out

where this fox lives,

...and tomorrow night

we're gonna camp in the bushes,

...wait for him to come out

of the hole in his tree,

...and shoot the cuss to smithereens.

How's that grab you, fellas?

Yeah. Well, let's see.

Why not?

Another book party?

Woah! I didn't see you,

sitting in the dark over there.

Yeah, no. Actually,

there's a fire.

I just got the call.

They said maybe it's arson?

I got to interview the marshall

and see what's...

Kylie, is he telling the truth?

I don't want to be

put in the middle of this.

Thanks, Kylie.

Why is he wearing that bandit hat?

His ears were cold.

He's not with us.

Go back to bed.

If what I think is happening

is happening...

...it better not be.

Nice job covering for me.

Next time, you...

All three!

Kill him!

We got the tail,

but we missed the fox.

Petey! Sorry to wake you.

I can trouble you to dash out here

right away with, shall we say,

...three shovels, two pick-axes,

...a bottle of apple-cider.

It'll grow back, won't it?

- Tails don't grow back.

- Tails don't grow back.

- Except for lizards.

Tails don't grow back.

I'm gonna be tailless

for the rest of my life.

Well, anyway, it's not half as bad as

double-pneumonia, right?

I mean, his dad's got one foot in the grave

and three feet on a banana peel.

That's a lot worse than...

Excuse me, everyone. I'm gonna go

meditate for half an hour.

You've got twenty-nine minutes

to come up with a proper apology.

Me? Me, have an apology?

He gets a bandit hat! He just got here

and he got a bandit hat!

Where's my bandit hat?

Why didn't I get shot at?

It's because, you, you...

you think I'm no good at anything!

Well, maybe you're right!

Thanks!

I told you not to bring him.

Why the cuss didn't I listen

to my lawyer?

At this point we'll be lucky

if we can flip this tree for...

...half of what we've

already sunk into it.

I won't be able to sleep

on my back for six weeks...

...and on my stomach

I feel congested.

Why the cuss didn't I listen

to my lawyer?

Because you don't listen to anybody.

- What was that?

- What? I said...

Wake up! Everybody!

They're digging us out!

- They'll kill the children!

- Over my dead body, they will.

That's what I'm saying!

You'd be dead, too, in that scenario!

- Well, I'm arguing against that!

- What are you talking about?

- Why are you yelling at me?

- Stop! Stop! Stop!

You say one thing, she says another,

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Roald Dahl

Roald Dahl (English: , Norwegian: [ˈruːɑl ˈdɑːl]; 13 September 1916 – 23 November 1990) was a British novelist, short story writer, poet, screenwriter, and fighter pilot. His books have sold more than 250 million copies worldwide.Born in Wales to Norwegian immigrant parents, Dahl served in the Royal Air Force during the Second World War. He became a flying ace and intelligence officer, rising to the rank of acting wing commander. He rose to prominence as a writer in the 1940s with works for both children and adults, and he became one of the world's best-selling authors. He has been referred to as "one of the greatest storytellers for children of the 20th century". His awards for contribution to literature include the 1983 World Fantasy Award for Life Achievement, and the British Book Awards' Children's Author of the Year in 1990. In 2008, The Times placed Dahl 16th on its list of "The 50 greatest British writers since 1945".Dahl's short stories are known for their unexpected endings, and his children's books for their unsentimental, macabre, often darkly comic mood, featuring villainous adult enemies of the child characters. His books champion the kindhearted, and feature an underlying warm sentiment. Dahl's works for children include James and the Giant Peach, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Matilda, The Witches, Fantastic Mr Fox, The BFG, The Twits and George's Marvellous Medicine. His adult works include Tales of the Unexpected. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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