Fantastic Mr Fox, The Page #5

Year:
2009
2,635 Views


We took everything.

They took everything?

Let me call you back, Petey.

- Well, they'd be anywhere by now.

- They're digging right under our feet.

Well, in a sense,

we've only made matters worse.

We should have stayed out of it.

I've got an idea.

I'm still not getting a signal.

Is anyboby getting any reception?

I don't have any signal,

but I've got a problem.

Crisp up those ducks.

Aye, drag those chickens.

Slow them down just a little bit,

we're a little ahead.

Where are the apples? Stiil out?

You still have them raw?

Well, slice them up.

Let's get them in the pantry.

I can imagine how painful, even just

emotionally, that must be for you.

Well, you know,

it's not the end of the world.

Oh, but Foxy, how humiliating!

Having your whole tail blown clean off...

Can we drop it?

Yeah, it's really good.

Sweet and nice.

Hey, they say you're a natural.

True or false?

- I just...

- Answer the question.

- True, I guess

- Correct.

Get out of here, Agnes. I need to

have a private word with Kristofferson.

- Just a minute. She doesn't...

- I don't mind. I'm gonna go talk to them.

Listen to me, I just had

a brainstorm for something...

...fantastic I've got to do.

But I can't do it alone.

- I'm not interested.

- Hear me out.

No, thanks.

I think foxes from your side of the family

take unnecessary risks.

Only because they got the guts

in their blood...

...and so do we.

- Was I a bit rude to Agnes?

- Yeah.

I'd probably say something I shoudn't.

I'll say something to her in a minute.

- What's the brainstorm?

- In a nutshell?

We're gonna steal back my dad's tail.

Okay, chief.

- Here we go.

Well, it took a near catastrophe

for all of you to finally...

...take me up on my offer to have you

over to the flint-mine for dinner.

- but I guess we have...

- I'm sorry.

Maybe my invitation got lost

in the mail.

Does anybody know what this

badger's talking about?

Hey, hold on.

But Clive's right.

In all seriousness.

Excuse me, B.

I guess we do have these

three ugly farmers to thank for one thing:

...reminding us to be thankful

and aware of each other.

I'm gonna say it again.

Aware.

I don't feel safe.

- That's because we're not.

You should probably

put on your bandit hat now.

Personally, I don't have one,

but I modified this tube sock.

- We look good.

- Yeah, we do.

Now where would you keep

a prized tail,

if you collected them,

if that was your hobby?

I'd probably hang it over

the mantelpiece.

Right. Good. In fact...

what's that smell?

Ever tasted one of Mrs. Bean's famous

nutmeg-ginger-apple-snaps?

Well, I didn't do.

They are still warm.

- We got it wrong.

- What?

It's not over the mantelpiece...

The necktie.

- Let's go. What?

- Hang on. I wanna do more.

- She's there!

- She can't see.

Look at each other.

Here we are. Wow!

Now I've already had too much to drink,

and I'm feeling sentimental,

but I'm gonna say something, anyway,

which nobody wants to admit,

...but I think is probably true.

We beat them.

We beat those farmers,

and now we're triumphantly eating

...their roasted chicken,

their sizzling duck,

...their succulent turkey,

their foie gras de...

- Where did the boys go?

- What? Where?

- Ash? Kristofferson?

- Boys?

Oh, my God! That was crazy!

I can't believe what just happened in there.

Come on, let's go out of here!

Let's go!

Where are we? Where are we?

Where are we? What?

Kristofferson?

What am I hearing again, baby?

What's happening?

Am I still paranoid?

Cider?

What just happened?

Something with cider.

That was dangerous.

- Is anyone hurt?

- We're all hurt!

My entire flint-mine just got demolished.

Apple juice.

Apple juice flood.

Let's do a head-count!

Everybody pick a buddy!

Where did the boys go?

- Ash?

- Ash?

Kristofferson? Ash!?

I'm here!

Ash! Who's your buddy?

- Kristofferson.

- Where is he?

- I don't know.

- Why not?

- I lost him!

- You lost him?

- I, uh, I was in the kitchen...

- Where were you?

- We were trying to find the necktie.

- What are you talking about?

- It's my fault.

- Oh, no.

Where did you that

nutmeg-ginger-apple-snap?

And why are you wearing that

fake bandit hat!?

We went to steal back your tail.

- Kristofferson! Kristofferson!

- Kristofferson! Kristofferson!

Wrap this wet, little mutt

in a newspaper...

...and put him in a box with

some holes punched in the top.

There's only one way out of this sewer,

but the manhole cover's closed,

...and there's a station wagon

parked on it.

Which means we're permanently

stuck down here.

You still think we beat them, Foxy?

Badger's right.

These farmers aren't gonna quit

until they catch me.

I shouldn't have lied to your face.

I shouldn't have fallen off

the wagon...

...and started secretly

stealing chickens on the sly.

I shouldn't have pushed these farmers

so far and tried to embarrass them

...and cuss with their heads.

I enjoyed it,

but I shouldn't have done it.

And now theres only one way out.

Maybe if I hand myself over

and let them kill me,

...stuff me, and hang me

over their mantelpiece.

You'll do no such thing.

Darling, maybe they'll let

everyone else live.

Oh, why did you have to get us

into this, Foxy?

I don't know,

but I have a possible theory.

I think I have this thing where I

need everybody to think...

I'm the greatest...

the quote-unquote fantastic Mr. Fox.

And if they aren't completely

knocked-out and dazzled,

...and kind of intimidated

by me, then...

I don't feel good about myself.

Foxes traditionally like to

court danger, hunt prey,

...and outsmart predators.

And that's what I'm actually good at!

I think, at the end of the day,

I'm just...

I know.

We're wild animals.

I guess we always were.

I promise you,

if I had all this to do over again,

I'd have never let you down.

It was always more fun

when we did it together, anyway.

- I love you, Felicity.

- I love you, too.

But I shouldn't have married you.

Did I ever tell you about the time

I learned we were gonna have a cub?

- In the fox-trap.

- Right.

- We were at gunpoint, and your mother...

- said she's pregnant.

Let me tell it, okay?

I had no idea how we were gonna

get out of this jam, and...

...then it hit me: what do foxes do better

than any other animal?

- Dig.

- You're stepping on my lines.

Right, keep telling it.

So we dug. And the whole time

I put paw over paw,

...scooping dirt and pebbles with

your mother digging like crazy beside me,

I kept wondering:

who is this little boy gonna be?

- Or girl.

- Or girl, right.

Because at that point we didn't know.

Ash, I'm so glad he was you.

It's not your fault...

it's mine.

Goodbye.

Well, I guess we should, uh...

...probably split into a

certain number of groups...

...and start doing something, right?

Can I have a glass of water?

Excuse me!

Excuse me?

Kristofferson?

Hello?

Can you hear us?

Kristofferson?

They got the boy.

They want to trade the son

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Roald Dahl

Roald Dahl (English: , Norwegian: [ˈruːɑl ˈdɑːl]; 13 September 1916 – 23 November 1990) was a British novelist, short story writer, poet, screenwriter, and fighter pilot. His books have sold more than 250 million copies worldwide.Born in Wales to Norwegian immigrant parents, Dahl served in the Royal Air Force during the Second World War. He became a flying ace and intelligence officer, rising to the rank of acting wing commander. He rose to prominence as a writer in the 1940s with works for both children and adults, and he became one of the world's best-selling authors. He has been referred to as "one of the greatest storytellers for children of the 20th century". His awards for contribution to literature include the 1983 World Fantasy Award for Life Achievement, and the British Book Awards' Children's Author of the Year in 1990. In 2008, The Times placed Dahl 16th on its list of "The 50 greatest British writers since 1945".Dahl's short stories are known for their unexpected endings, and his children's books for their unsentimental, macabre, often darkly comic mood, featuring villainous adult enemies of the child characters. His books champion the kindhearted, and feature an underlying warm sentiment. Dahl's works for children include James and the Giant Peach, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Matilda, The Witches, Fantastic Mr Fox, The BFG, The Twits and George's Marvellous Medicine. His adult works include Tales of the Unexpected. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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