Father of the Bride Page #7

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I was beginning to feel like I was

having an out-of-body experience.

I had to get out

of the house and fast.

Nina said as long as

I was escaping, would I mind...

escaping to the market

and picking up something for dinner?

Sure. That was all I needed.

A busy supermarket.

I needed to drive, mellow out,

get my mind off the wedding.

But mellowing out

was not in the cards.

Here we go.

Here we go. Yeah.

- Excuse me, sir. What are you doing?

- I'll tell you what I'm doing.

I want to buy eight hot dogs

and eight hot dog buns to go with them.

But no one sells eight hot dog buns.

They only sell twelve hot dog buns.

So I end up paying

for four buns I don't need.

So I am removing

the superfluous buns.

I-l'm sorry, sir, but you're gonna

have to pay for all twelve buns.

- They're not marked individually.

- Yeah.

And you wanna know why? Because some

big shot over at the wiener company...

got together with some big shot

over at the bun company...

and decided to rip off

the American public.

Because they think the American public

is a bunch of trusting nitwits...

- who'll pay for things they don't need

rather than make a stink.

- Get me security.

Well, they're not ripping off

this nitwit anymore...

because I'm not paying

for one more thing I don't need.

George Banks is saying no!

Who's George Banks?

Me!

Uh, why don't we just

calm down now, sir?

I'll tell you why "we" don't calm down.

Because you're not excited.

It takes two people for a "we"

to calm down, doesn't it?

Uh, that I don't know, sir. I'm just

the assistant manager of a supermarket.

But I'll tell you this. If you don't

pipe down and pay for those buns...

- I'm gonna call the police.

- Oh, right!

Yeah. Uh-huh. Yeah. Right.

- That's right.

- Hey.

- Right.

- Hey! Hey, come here!

- Uh-uh! Uh-uh!

- Come here!

Uh-uh! Uh-uh!

That was the low point.

Flipping out over four hot dog buns.

I couldn't figure out

why I'd gotten so nuts...

why the wedding had me so unglued.

Banks, your wife is here.

- Aren't you going to let me out?

- She wants to talk to you first.

- She wants to talk to me first?

- Thank you.

Hello, George.

Why do you look happy

to see me in here, Nina?

Happy? No, no, no.

I'm not happy, George.

You think I was happy to tell everyone

that I had to come...

down to the city jail and bail you out

for stealing hot dog buns?

- I wasn't stealing them--

- Ah!

- I was having a little--

- Ah!

I'm going to have to ask you

not to talk or I'll have to call...

Officer What's-his-name

over there.

You've been more

than I can handle, George.

Annie's wedding is not

a conspiracy against you.

It's just a wedding. People have them

every day in every country in the world.

I know it's going to be expensive,

but we don't go to Europe.

We don't own fancy cars.

I don't own expensive jewellery.

So we can afford

to have a big wedding.

Nina.

I'll get you out of here

on one condition, Banks.

That you agree to the following.

Now, repeat after me.

I, George Stanley Banks...

I, George Stanley Banks...

promise to pull it together

and act my age. Promise.

promise to pull it together

and act my age.

I will stop hyperventilating, rolling my

eyes, unbuttoning my top collar button.

- I don't unbutton my top collar--

- Oh yeah. No. You mean this bit, with--

- Stop hyperventilating...

- Hyperventilating.

- rolling my eyes, and, uh...

- Unbuttoning.

unbuttoning

my top collar button.

I will stop making faces in general,

and I will definitely stop...

telling everybody I meet

how much this wedding is costing.

I don't tell everyone

how much it costs!

- He told you, right?

- 250 a head.

Oh, well, thanks!

I will try to remember

my daughter's feelings.

And how with every roll of my eyes, I am

taking away a piece of her happiness.

I love you, Nina.

Just repeat the last part

for me, George.

I will try to remember

my daughter's feelings...

- That's right.

- and how with every roll of my eyes...

I am taking away

a piece of her happiness.

I love you too.

Let's go home, okay?

- No!

- Hey, I'm gonna hold ya here!

- Yes! Sweet!

- Come on, Matty. Let's go.

Plan "B," Matty. Plan "B."

Here we go! Hey!

Okay, I got ya! I got ya!

- Midget slam!

- All right!

Annie! Bryan! Look,

you got a present.

Our first present!

I can't believe it.

Oh, our second one

should be here any minute.

- Oh, wow. How do you know?

- Oh, my parents are bringing it over.

- Oh!

- Oh!

Oh, this is, uh, when we give

the presents. Uh, great. Uh, good.

- I'll be right back.

- Where's he goin'?

- Maybe he got a present for you.

- You know about this?

Uh, I haven't got a clue.

- Look at this!

- This is for us? Thank you so much!

Yikes. A whole car.

My dad's gotta see this!

Dad! Dad?

Dad, did you see

what the MacKenzies got us?

It's unbelievable. And you thought

you'd never have a new car.

I know! What's that?

It's nothing. It's just a gift

I was thinking of giving you guys.

You know, it's something you said

you didn't have but you wanted.

Can I see it?

Yeah, you know, it's--

It's not the big,

big gift, of course.

It's a cappuccino maker!

Supposed to be a good one.

That's what they said at the store.

It's, uh, top of the line.

Makes great foam.

I couldn't love anything more.

Goin' to the chapel and we're

- My feelings exactly.

- Gonna get married

Goin' to the chapel and we're

- Gonna get married

- Wow!

Gee, I really love you and we're

Gonna get married

Goin' to the chapel of love

Spring is here

The sky is blue

Whoa, birds all sing

- As if they knew

- No.

Today's the day

We'll say I do

And we'll never

be lonely any more

All right, Mr Banks.

Here you go.

- A 40-long. It's gorgeous

even on the hanger.

- Because we're goin' to the chapel

- Now this is an actual Giorgio Armani,

the real McCoy.

- And we're gonna get married

- Don't ask how I got it,

but here it is.

- Goin' to the chapel

And we're gonna get married

Gee, I really love you

and we're

Gonna get married

Goin' to the chapel of love

Bells will ring

The sun will shine, whoa

I'll be his

- Nina, we have great friends,

you know that?

- And he'll be mine

I mean, these are not

your run-of-the-mill salad bowls.

Theses are primo gifts.

- We'll love until

- As a matter of fact, I am so happy

we have decided to serve...

- The end of time, and we'll never

- the very chic but exponsive seafoot

at our very foshionable wotting.

- Be lonely anymore

- Ah! The beautiful bride! Good news!

You have received another lovely,

too-good-to-be-true silver tea set.

- What's the matter?

- Send it back.

- Come on. What do you mean?

- Daddy, I'm not kidding!

Send them all back.

The wedding's off!

Anne? Annie?

I'm sorry, Dad,

but I'm not gonna marry Bryan.

Okay, okay. Whatever you want

is okay with us.

I feel so awful,

after everything you guys have done.

And now

I have to undo it all.

Don't worry about it. These things

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