Father of the Bride Part II Page #5

- What's wrong with her?|- Nothing.

Nothing that won't go away|in nine months.

Kids, you're gonna|have a baby.

- Excuse me?|- Nina's pregnant.

- Oh, my God.|- Pregnant?

- And who, may I ask, is the father?|- George!

Don't ''George'' me,|you two-timing Mata Hari.

I swear, we haven't|done it in six weeks.

I haven't just felt myself|lately, but pregnant?

How could this happen,|Nina Dickerson?

Why are you calling me|by my maiden name, you big jerk?

And, what do you mean we haven't|done it in six weeks? What about|that little escapade in the kitchen?

Oh, please. That was|a stupid nothing. I mean, that|was a moment of pure insanity.

Would you like to know|how many moments of pure insanity...

I've delivered|over the last 20 years?

Phil, look at me.|I'm about to be a grandfather.

Things like this|do not happen to men my age.

Come on! Picasso had children|well into his seventies.

Ah, well, you know, Picasso.|I mean, Picasso.

I mean, there-- He's the one guy in|history who had kids into his seventies.

But, you know, he's an artist.|He can do anything he wants.

I'm just-- You know,|I'm just a, a regular Joe.

You know, regular Joes don't|have, have babies at my age!

You know, I was-- I was just|adjusting to being a grandfather!

Preg--

Oh! Oh, my God!

- All right. Here you go, Mr. Banks.|- Oh, I'm all right.|- George?

- Now, wait a minute.|- Here. Let me help. I'll help.|- I'm okay.

- You okay?|- I'm okay.|- Let's see if you got|your sea legs back yet.

- Sorry about that. I'm just, uh--|- The shock.

- I know.|- Anyway, thank you.

- Uh-huh. Bye-bye.|- Thank you.|- I know, honey. Me too.

I just-- God. I can't|believe it, huh? Yikes!

Well, you don't think he could be like,|you know, wrong or something, do you?

I don't think he used a|home pregnancy test, George. No.

Honey, this is definitely like|I'm-- This is happening, George.

I know it's a lot to deal with,|but we'll just-- we'll just|let it sink in, all right?

- Good idea.|- Okay. Mom's the word, huh?

Did she say,|''Mom's the word''?

Oh, man. This was a life curve|I was not ready for.

''Grandmother Has Baby.'' It was like|a National Enquirer headline.

One would have thought nothing on earth|could have topped this moment.

- Wrong again.|- It's the musk oil smell|that scares me.

- Oh, well.|- Oh!

- Oh, my God, the Banks!|- Oh, my gosh.

And my favorite|father of the bride.

- Hi. How are you?|- Hello!

- Great. Wonderful. You|look wonderful. Mr. Banks.|- Oh. Look at you!

- Chop, chop, chop.|Oh, you look beautiful.|- How are you, sir?

Imagine running into you here of all|places. This is our home away from home.

Well, I am always fixing, you know.|A nip, a tuck, a little suction.

You know, I look in the mirror|and I say, ''Hello. Looking sad.''

So I come down here, I valet|park, and bongo, Cher Bono.

So how 'bout you? Nothing is wrong,|I hopes? Your health is good?

- Oh, yeah, yeah. We're--|We're good. We're perfect.|- Oh, yeah, it's good. It's great.

- We're healthy and,|uh, nothing to report.|- Very healthy.

- Nothing at all.|- Great.|- Oh, well.

- Oh.|- Mrs. Banks.

- Huh?|- You forgot your prenatal vitamins...

and all your pamphlets|on becoming a mommy again...

- and the ultrasound photo.|- Oh.

Your baby's first picture.

- Oh, no.|- Baby's first picture? Don't--

- Don't tell me you are pregnant?|- No?|- Yeah. I am.

- Oh, my God!|- I know. I just found out.

Oh, I love that so much! Mother of|the bride and a mommy! Get out of town!

- Oh, mazeltov, Mrs. Banks!|- And guess what.

- What?|- Annie's pregnant too.

- Oh, no!|- I didn't hear that!

Mother and daughter are|pregnant together? Oh!

That is fabulous!|I love that ! That's chic.

- I think I'm gonna faint.|- He did.

This is what I suggest. You must|let me do the baby shower.

- Howard, hands me the book.|Quick. Quick, boy.|- Oh!

No, no, Franck. Not this time.|No more parties. No way. N-O.

You never wants to have fun,|George. And you never change.

Every party has a pooper|That's why we invited you

- Party pooper|- Party pooper

Every party has a pooper|That's why we invited you George Banks

- That's you|- It was on the second chorus...

of ''Every party has a pooper''|that I got woozy again.

Next thing I knew, we|were driving through town.

Nina was glowing.

She looked so peaceful.

Grab your coat|and get your hat

Leave your worries|on the doorstep

- You can't get me!|- Just direct your feet|- Slow down, son!|Whoa, whoa, whoa! Wait, son!

- Whoa, whoa, whoa!|- To the sunny side of the street

Can you hear|the pitter-pat

- Yeah, that happy tune he's whistlin'|- George?

- Nina?|- Honey, I need to know how|you feel about all this.|- Life can be so sweet

- Dad, I want a hot dog!|- On the sunny side of the street

- They don't have any hot dogs!|They don't have hot dogs!|- I don't like--

Don't! Josh! No! No! No!

I feel super about it.|I'm totally up for it.

- You are?|- Definitely.

Oh!

So what do you think? You think we have|the stamina to have a baby?

What do you mean, honey?|For the actual pregnancy?

- Well, I know I have|the stamina for that part.|- Oh, well. That's a relief.

I'm talking about the rest of it,|like the next 18 years part.

But, George, for weeks you've been|telling me how young you are.

- And you've been telling me|how old we are.|- Well, we're obviously|not too old, honey.

Well, Nina, let's be honest. I|mean, just because a man wears sneakers,|it doesn't make him a teenager.

I was completely kidding myself.|When I was working out at the gym, there|were 60 year olds more buff than me.

Oh, so we're too old for this. ls that|what you're trying to tell me, George?

No, it's just that I was beginning|to feel like we were approaching...

that big parenting|finishing line.

Now to be all the way back|at the starting gate?

Not to mention, we will be|like the oldest parents ever|at the starting gate.

I mean, let's face it. Between us,|we're almost a hundred years old.

But don't get me wrong.|I'm into it.

3:
00 a.m. feedings and diapers and car|seats and Mister Rogers and vomiting.

- Hi.|- Hi.

Hi, sweetie. Hi.

- Hi.|- Hi.|- Hi, guys.

- Hi.|- Hi.|- Everything go okay?

Oh. Oh.

So what's going on?|What'd the doctor say?

Is that, uh, TV still on the blink?|Because I have time now, I--

- Dad.|- Okay.

- Well, he, uh--|- Mom, you can tell me. I'm a big girl.

Well, honey, as it turns out,|my, my blood tests are fine.

- Good.|- Yeah. And I'm not even|going through menopause.

- I thought you were too young for that.|- Yeah, well, I don't know.

So what is it?|Did he find anything?

Well, actually, he did, didn't he?|He did find a little something.

He did? What?

Believe it or not,|your father and I--

- We're going to have a baby.|- We're pregnant!

You guys!|That is so unfunny.

I mean, can you imagine|if that were true?

I mean, you couldn't be.

You're serious?|You're really pregnant?

I'm due September 4,|Labor Day.

Perfect timing, huh? Labor Day.|You know, we should go now.

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