Feet First Page #4

Well, my shoes are no more

horrible than yours.

I've got a very dainty foot.

- Are you ready?

- Yes, just about.

I want to buy some lace

next door.

I'll meet you in the car.

Well, I'll be with you

right away.

Say no more about it.

Say no more about it.

Well, I can't imagine

how such a thing could happen.

No, of course you couldn't.

Well, Mrs. Tanner,

it's never happen again.

I know very well it won't,

because you won't be here.

Oh, please.

- What is it?

- Pardon me.

Now what are you doing?

That's a bright move.

Are you deliberately trying

to make a fool out of me?

Yes, Ma'am... No, Ma'am!

You get my shoe and get it on

my foot. Let me get out of here.

You'll hear from this,

young man.

You'll find out that you can't

insult Mrs. Tanner...

...with impunity

and get away with it.

You'll hear from me later

regarding this...

Oh, oh, oh!

Oh, I'm on fire!

Hurry, police! Water!

Something has got to help me!

Don't stand there

like a wooden Indian!

Officer, is it all right

to take these shoes aboard?

No, son, you can't go on.

But I gave the lady

my personal assurance...

...that I would take them aboard!

Well, all right,

but make it snappy.

- We're sailing in five minutes.

- Yes, sir.

All right, I will.

All ashore that's going ashore!

- Oh, Mr. Harold!

- Huh?

- Oh!

- Oh, hello!

- Hello!

- Well, hello.

I'm so glad

you're going to be onboard.

Huh?

Oh, yes.

We'll have a glorious time

on the trip to the mainland...

...won't we?

Uh, that's right.

Oh, there are the folks.

They'll be glad to see you.

Come on!

Oh, but now...

There's that woman that we met

at the Royal Hawaiian Hotel.

- Huh? Let's see.

- There.

Aw, you're crazy.

That's not that woman at all.

Now, just what do you mean?

Say, you've got

the funniest complex.

You think you've met

everybody that you see.

Yes? Really?

Look who's here!

- Well!

- Hello.

And what do you think?

He's going with us!

Well, Mr. Harold, now,

it's a pleasure to have you...

...with us on the trip.

Oh, this is my wife,

Mrs. Tanner.

This is Mr. Harold.

- Harold. Harold?

- How do you do?

Why, haven't we met

someplace before?

Well, uh, that's

quite possible Mrs. Tanner.

You see, I, uh,

I might have been there.

There you go with that

funny complex of yours again.

She's always mistaking

somebody for somebody else.

- She's funny that way.

- Thank you, darling!

Well, they'll be leaving

any moment now.

Let's go up front

and see the excitement.

Uh, well, uh,

you know, I'll be right back.

I've got to get some cigars.

Oh, here now, don't bother.

Why, try one of mine.

Hey.

Someday they'll make

one way cigars.

- Barbara.

- Yes?

Is that or is that not

the woman that we met...

...at The Royal Hawaiian?

And I'm sure I've seen this

Mr. Harold someplace before.

Why, you haven't bitten off

the end.

Oh, that's right.

Well, how is the leather

business this morning?

Things look pretty tough.

Hmm. They don't to me.

Well, perhaps you don't know

what I know.

What do you know?

Oh, by the way,

you know, I just remembered.

I must send a wireless.

I'll be right back.

Oh now, here, don't bother!

Why, that boy over there'll

take it for you.

Oh, uh... Oh, yeah.

Oh, uh, Sergeant!

Come here!

There.

Barbara says I am right.

That is the woman we met

at the Royal Hawaiian.

Just a moment.

Here.

Come back and repeat what's

written on that card right away.

Uh, marvelous thing,

the wireless.

No wires to break

or get out of order.

We ought to have

a marvelous trip.

Yes, that's right.

Madam, your instep

is much too beautiful...

...to be spoiled

by a short vamp shoe.

Huh? What?

Did you say something?

Oh, nothing at all, Mrs. Tanner.

Nothing at all.

You see, we always

send our messages in code.

We find it much safer.

That'll be all, Elmer.

Oh, say, speaking

of the leather business...

Oh, uh, by the way, you know...

I just remembered,

I've got to see the purser.

- I'll be right back.

- I'll go with you.

I want to see him, too.

Oh, well, that's just dandy.

Uh...

His office is down this way.

Oh, well, when did he move?

Do you know,

his face bothers me.

Oh, you were born bothered.

Oh, really?

I was so surprised

to run into you.

Your being here

is so unexpected.

Yes, it was.

- Here's the purser's office.

- Oh, yes, that's right.

Now, where's my hat?

Oh, I've lost my...

you go right on in.

I'll get my hat,

and I'll be right back.

Go right ahead.

I'll be right back.

I beg your pardon,

but have you a ticket?

Uh, well, why... why certainly.

- You don't think that...

- Oh, no offense.

I found one, and I'm merely

trying to locate the owner.

Oh, say...

...was that a blue ticket?

No, it was a pink one.

Oh, it would be.

Hey, put a little water

over here.

OK.

I love you.

- Who do you love next?

- You.

Who do you love next and next?

You, you.

Who do you love

next and next and next?

You, you, you, you, you.

- No, you don't.

- Yes, I do.

- You don't.

- I do.

- No, you don't.

- Oh, yes, I do.

- No, you don't.

- Yes, I do.

- Oh, no, you don't.

- Oh, yes, I do.

- No, you don't.

- I do.

No...

Uh, steward.

Uh, serve my breakfast

up on deck, also.

What's your table number, sir?

Oh, now,

I must have forgotten it.

- Well, never mind, let it go.

- Yes, sir.

Well, good morning, Sergeant.

You know, I'll bet

that's a roast beef sandwich.

Uh-huh.

Yes, sir. Well, sir, you know,

I think that instead...

...of going below, I'll just

eat a bite up here on deck.

Oh, by the way...

I'm surprised at you!

Why, you ought to be

ashamed of yourself.

Eating a sandwich here

when you should be working.

Huh, disgusting.

Where's your ambition?

Let me tell you something.

It's men like you

that give sailors a bad name.

You know, to be a success...

...you've got to work

twenty-four hours a day.

Longer, if necessary.

Remember, a rolling stone

gathers no moss.

That's the idea, young man.

Oh, how do you do, Mr. Tanner?

How do you do?

That's the spirit I like to see.

Young fella,

you follow his advice...

...and you'll amount to something.

How about a stroll

along the deck...

...to work up an appetite, huh?

Oh, well, uh... Remember,

think more and eat less.

Huh?

No, I was just giving him

a little more advice.

Oh, by the way, have a cigar.

- Oh, no, now...

- Now, don't apologize.

I should apologize,

but it's the best I've got.

Uh...

Beat you that time.

- Good morning.

- Oh, good morning.

Good morning. We were just

taking a constitutional.

Oh, well,

we were just taking a walk.

I don't believe

I'll do very much walking.

My feet are just killing me.

Come on over here and sit down.

No use torturing your feet.

You ought to have sense enough

to get shoes that fit you.

Well, did you sleep well

last night, Miss Tanner?

What did you say?

Well, I said did you sleep well

last night, Miss Tanner?

Not so good. It was a little

stuffy in my stateroom.

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