Five Graves to Cairo Page #3

General Sebastiano.

- Is there no proper bathroom in this hotel?

- Oh yes, sir.

- I will have it.

- It belongs to the Field Marshall.

Another kick in the face.

They let us die, but dont let us wash.

Well, what did we expect?

As we say in Milano, when you lie down

with dogs, you wake up with fleas.

Thats right, sir.

You havent heard anything?

Of course, not. From so far away,

how can I hear what they say in Milano?

- Good.

- I can fill the Generals washbasin.

Please. My orderly is in the hospital

with measles.

German measles!

Look at that. Look at that.

When this war is over,

I shall lie in my own bathtub...

... filled with blue Italian water,

and sing and sing and sing.

But not Wagner.

In Benghazi, they have stolen my toothbrush.

Will that be all, General?

- Good night.

- Good night, sir.

Waiter!

Yes sir?

What is the name of the maid here?

- Mouche, sir.

- Mouche?

- When I want you, I ring once.

- Yes, sir.

Then its two rings for the maid.

- Thats right, sir.

- Good night.

Good night.

Im sorry.

The key. Turn the key.

- Whats happened?

- I found these papers.

Here, the three passports, see: Danish,

a Swiss one, a Romanian.

Let me see how I look.

Mm, what a kindly face.

Id never suspect myself.

Now how was I to know he was working

with the Germans? Glove in glove.

He came here two years ago. He said he

wanted a job here, on account of his lungs.

He had, what you call,

you know, b...b...b...

What do you know about a

Professor Cronstaetter?

Professor Cronstaetter? Yes I think I know

that name. Or do I... maybe I dont.

What about graves? Five graves?

Graves? Whose graves?

Alright, what did Davos have to do

with the laundry?

With the laundry? Nothing, sir,

nothing at all.

- Mouche.

- Mouche.

Mouche knew him better than I did.

Didnt you, Mouche?

- Who?

- Davos who.

What of it?

We were talking about the laundry, here.

Where does Davos come in?

I do the laundry.

All alone?

Sometimes, he helps me put it out

to dry.

A flag on the sand, perhaps?

Bed sheets, towels, washcloths all nicely

spread out for the Messerschmitts

What Messerschmitts?

Its my guess, mademoiselle, that

youve been washing some sort of alphabet.

A towel could be a dash; a washcloth a dot.

Dont you see, a sheet could mean

ten thousand men...

... and a towel, petrol tanks

coming through.

- You suspected nothing?

- No.

The sheet, a dash and e...

Say that slower please.

Its perfectly simple.

The Germans were smart again.

And the British were stupid.

Why not call it nave, mademoiselle.

We use sheets just to sleep on,

towels for drying hands.

Your hands will need a lot of towels.

Shh, Mouche, please, why fight?

He will not be here long.

He... hes going away.

Arent you, sir?

No, Im not.

But sir, I heard with my own ears

from the kitchen.

They are letting you through the lines.

Theyre sending you to Cairo, sir.

- You will be safe.

- Of course.

I limp into British Headquarters

in Cairo, with this club foot of mine.

Where have you been Corporal Bramble.

Oh, nowhere in particular.

I spent a day or two with Rommel.

Rommel?

Field Marshall Rommel, sir.

You mean to say, you were under

the same roof with Rommel? Yes sir.

As close as I am to you?

Thats right, sir. And...

And what, sir?

You didnt leave him with a bullet in his

head and his head in a puddle of blood?

Sir, sir.

Hes talking so fast again.

Hes talking foolish.

Perhaps, Corporal John J. Bramble

formerly...

... of the Four Square Insurance Company,

Head Office:
Thread needle Street, London,...

... clerk of the Claims Department...

... always rather afraid of the manager...

... one of 120 thousand men

in the Army of the Nile.

That it should be this J Bramble

does sound foolish.

Oh, Im scared. Im all scared inside.

What do you think I am?

Its just that I happen to have drawn

the black ball, blast it.

But we havent drawn it,

Farid and I.

Oh no, we havent. And we saved

your life, didnt we Mouche?

I heard a wife crying and two little boys,

and some words came out of my mouth.

And Im very grateful. But you wont

be involved, either of you.

Ill work it out.

You will work it out, ah?

In the morning, hell ring for breakfast.

Number 5. Black coffee in bed.

No one else in the room.

It must all happen very quickly.

Perhaps as he drops in his second

lump of sugar.

- So thats all you want.

- Yes.

Because its good for England.

Oh, I dont imagine that it will win

the war.

But, itll knock the breath

out of them for a while.

Well, youre not going to do it. Because,

it doesnt fit in with my plans, understand?

What plans?

What do you think I stayed on here

in this filthy place for?

I was waiting for them, understand?

No, I dont understand.

Because, I want to do business with them.

Business? I see.

Thats not very attractive, Mademoiselle.

What you think of me, I dont care that.

Hey now. Now listen. All I know...

I will take in his breakfast.

One, six, eight, twelve.

This is my hotel. Alright alright.

But I wish I was in a black pit

with my back broken wrecked.

I got my wish.

I wouldnt want them to see me

with my shoes off.

Youll be glad to know that I never snore.

Except when I sleep in pajamas,

Russian style.

Now that Im trying desperately to strike a

more genial note...

... a 'yes or 'is that so?'...

... or even a 'shut up' would

stimulate the conversation considerably.

Good night.

Thank you.

Being from Marseilles, you must be

an addict of that soup...

... that bouillabaisse with all

the fish in it.

One always expects to find an old galosh

somewhere near the bottom of the plate.

Thats where I expected an is that so?.

Is that so?

They are calling you, Mademoiselle.

Farid is looking after it.

Farid wont do, obviously. One and three

and six have rung again.

They say Rommel keeps his Africa Corps

in hothouses...

... before he sends them out

into the desert.

Must be quite some time,

since theyve heard a womans voice.

Number 8, the major with a monocle.

Yes, you get pretty lonely after

a year or so.

I been here 18 months, myself.

Its a lot of days.

But a lot more nights.

Oh Mademoiselle, I think this is the time

for an additional bit of information.

I lied to you. I had to say something

quick and effective to soften your heart.

I havent any children and I havent

any wife. Ive never been married.

- Is that so?

- Can you forgive me?

Thank you.

Ah. Heres a request from the Italian General.

How about the Italian General?

Not the Italian General.

How about the Major with the monocle?

Not the Major with the monocle.

Who are you waiting for, Mademoiselle?

Number 5.

The Field Marshall himself.

Sorry, mademoiselle,

I take Number 5.

Good night.

Good night.

British prisoners, ten minutes rest!

Mouche!

Mouche!

Good morning, Your Excellency.

On the table, Your Excellency?

Where is the waiter?

Im quicker on my feet.

Here

Sugar, Your Excellency?

I dont like women in the morning.

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