Flashbacks Of A Fool Page #4

as animals.

She saw a man in a turban

and said, "If they live in this country,

they should be forced

to wear civilised clothes. "

Well, she's right, ain't she?

F***ing n*ggers and Pakis!

- Coming over here, taking our jobs.

- Shut up, Hubble, you prat.

It's boring here.

I'm off to the arcade. Coming, Hubble?

No. I think I'm gonna catch some sun

and watch these losers catch a cold.

- Alright. See you later, mate.

- See you later, mate.

- What are you girls up to?

- Hello.

Don't you say hello to me,

you horrible girl.

You say,

"Good afternoon, Mrs Rogers. "

It's heartbreaking the way

your mother lets you run wild.

- Good afternoon, Mrs Rogers.

- These girls shouldn't run wild.

They should be at school!

- It's summer holidays, Mrs Rogers.

- Holidays!

There are too many holidays! Holidays.

When I was a girl,

we didn't have all these holidays.

We had Christmas holidays.

That was all we had.

- I hate her.

- Just ignore her.

- She's a miserable old lady.

- She murdered her children.

- She did!

- Did she?

She poisoned them.

Yeah. And then she chopped them up

and put the bits in the sea.

You'd better behave, then,

or she might just do the same to you.

I wish that boy wouldn't sing.

He's gonna sour the milk.

Jane, eat it up.

You haven't touched a thing.

- I don't bloody like it!

- Jane, don't swear!

Don't pay any attention. She's been

swearing like a trooper all week.

- She's just testing.

- You mixed everything up together.

I can't undo it

and put everything back into piles.

Just try a little bit.

Nice crop of tomatoes this year.

Was there anything else you'd like?

- Fishfingers.

- I don't think we've got any.

You know, one of those

Jehovah's Witnesses came by today.

Told me that me and my garden

will go to hell.

Your mum'll have to cook you something

when you get home.

I don't think

we've got anything you like.

- Hello?

- Hi!

- You look nice

- Do I?

Sit down. I'll give you a cup of tea.

Joe, are you in there?

I'm sorry, I need the loo.

Hi.

You smell nice.

- Have you got a date?

- Yeah.

Come to my house

before you meet your girlfriend.

- I don't...

- You won't be sorry.

Jack's at his mother's.

Warnings of gales in Viking,

Forties, Cromarty, Forth...

Hold on.

- Let me look at you.

- Look at my little Elvis!

Can I go now?

Yeah, go on.

- Don't be late.

- ... high, becoming rough.

Showers, moderate or good.

Dogger, Bailey...

- Joe?

- I'm late already.

Don't be silly. I won't keep you long.

- Come in

- But I'm really late.

Just for a minute.

Anyway, it's good

to keep a girl waiting.

Joe!

Take your shirt off.

Undo me.

Go faster! Go faster, Joe!

Don't worry about Joe.

He's always late.

He'll be late for his own funeral.

Go on.

Sorry I'm late.

I had to do something for my mum.

Couldn't get away.

Do you find this approach

usually works?

What?

Let me guess,

you've never tried it before.

What?

Your neck's covered in love bites!

You really surprise me, Joe Scott.

F***!

F***.

F***ing hell!

Did Evelyn do that?

It was Evelyn, wasn't it?

- What happened?

- Nothing happened.

- What d'you mean, nothing happened?

- Nothing happened!

What are you gonna do about Ruth?

Didn't look happy, did she?

You think if I'm out the way,

you stand a chance.

Well, you don't. Not with Ruth.

Just f***ing calm down, for f***'s sake!

- Hit him!

- Shut up, Chillo!

- You're supposed to be mates!

- Go on, Joe!

Go on!

Yes, Boots! Go on, mate!

Come on!

What the f*** are you doing?

What the f*** are you doing?

- Get off me!

- If I get off, you'll calm down?

Just get off!

Hit him, Joe!

F*** off!

You f***ing deserved that, Joe!

Looking good, Joe. Looking good!

I like a storm,

but this is more than enough.

We can go beachcombing tomorrow.

You always get something good

washed up after a storm.

God!

What's wrong with him?

Have you been in my room?

I tidied it up.

Did you enjoy

looking through my things?

- I always do!

- Just stay out of my room!

I don't think his date went very well.

Hi, Joe.

- Is something wrong?

- No.

Are you sure?

Look what you did.

- Did I do that?

- Yeah, you did.

Well, I didn't mean to.

I didn't know what I was doing.

I really didn't mean to.

I didn't, Joe.

It was so amazing,

I didn't know what I was doing.

- Really?

- Yeah, really.

Jack's at work.

If you wanna come back.

Just gotta get Jane out.

- Out.

- I don't want to go out!

- Out!

- But I want to watch The Clangers!

You watch too much TV. If you go out

I'll buy you an ice cream.

- I don't want to go out!

- Do as I say! Now get out!

- I hate you!

- Yeah, and I hate you, too!

Thumbs into the hole.

That's a good girl.

Jane!

Jane! Come away!

Come away, Jane!

Jane! It's a mine!

Jane!

Come away! It's a mine!

Grace!

Peggy! Grace!

Peggy, come here!

Jane, come away!

- It's a mine!

- It's mine!

Jane!

Mrs Rogers, are you alright?

I tried to save her, but I couldn't.

That poor girl!

That poor wee girl.

Who?

I shouted to her. "Come away!"

"Come away!"

Who?

Evelyn's little girl, Jane.

Oh, my God!

I saw her from my window.

Grace, take Jesse

back up to the house.

One of them sea mines from the war.

Mrs Rogers, are you alright?

Washed up by the storm.

Mrs Rogers, you stay right there.

I'm gonna be right back.

- What happened?

- Go take care of Mrs Rogers.

- What happened?

- Just do what I say!

Who will tell Jack?

He already knows.

The police phoned him at work.

He'll blame me.

He won't blame you.

It's not your fault.

He will. He'll blame me.

He thinks I never loved her.

I'm sure he doesn't think that.

She never liked me.

Not since the day she was born.

- She cried every time I held her.

- Evelyn, don't do this to yourself.

It's true.

I tried, I really did.

But it was almost

a physical thing.

I always envied the way

your kids were with you.

Of course Jane loved you.

It's just kids are strange. They have

funny ways of showing love sometimes.

Can you go now?

- Are you sure?

- I wanna be by myself.

- If you're sure. I just...

- Go.

Please.

If you want anything...

Anything at all...

I want my baby!

Bodies used to be kept

in the house for 12 days.

Everyone kept the body

as long as they could.

They didn't dare part with it.

Now you can't get rid of it

quick enough.

You see, they were afraid

the corpse might still be alive.

That was the real reason

for hanging on to it.

People now have

a postmortem, glory be,

and it's all settled in a minute.

But years ago, there were some folk

who got buried alive.

Have you seen Jesse anywhere?

O- Out on the porch.

And Joe, is he ready?

Joe? Joe?

People used to leave an instruction

in their will

to have a vein cut,

just to be on the safe side.

Come on. Got to be there in

ten minutes. Can't keep them waiting.

You go on. I'll be there in a minute.

No, you come with us now!

I don't want you to be late.

I don't know

why they're having a funeral.

There's no body in the coffin.

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