Fonzy

---

- Mr Costa?

- Yes.

Follow me.

- Your first time?

- Yes.

When you're done, come see me.

Good morning, Diego.

Time for breakfast.

I'll go see the banks!

You owe us 50 grand!

Vile want our money!

Got 50 grand?

I'll get it!

Love and kisses, Mum.

Dad wants you.

You're 45 minutes late.

I know.

- Speed it up.

- I'm racing.

You took the van home.

You're a drag!

I said not to use it

for personal reasons.

- I know...

- But you do anyway.

Yes.

Got the jerseys for tonight?

Sure.

This is serious, OK?

First game of the season.

Have you got the jerseys?

Do you hear answers?

- Hi,

Yes, baby. Yes...

Yes, you're my priority.

Crabs!

I wasn't talking to you.

That wasn't for you, honey.

Listen to me.

Why did I knock her up?

- Diego, never have kids. Promise.

- I promise.

You bet I'm listening.

I'm with customers right now.

You're breaking up.

It's the connec... lo?

Damn... Your... break... up.

...all you ba...

love.

She's killing me.

Let's go.

Sorted out your debts?

I'm hopeful.

I'm seeing the banks later.

Statistically, I should get a loan

but, if not, there's plan B.

I'll need your green thumb.

My green thumb?

No one else is any good with plants.

I bought

a small hydroponic greenhouse.

You're growing pot?

Yep.

Only top-end stuff.

Tangerine Dream.

2010 Cannabis Cup winner.

The Cannabis Cup? Sh*t...

Over 30 days to bloom

for a yield

of 200 to 400g a meter.

But with a good gardener...

500 to 700g. Are you in?

Absolutely. Great idea.

On top of the stress

of the labour alerts from that hysteric.

I could use my free time

to join a drug ring

and risk being part

of a huge court case.

Is that a yes?

No! It's a no, for God's sake!

How much do you owe?

- How much?

- 50 grand.

50 grand?

If you shout it, it sounds a lot.

Diego...

I love you like a son.

I am your son, Dad.

That's why I love you like a son.

But if you don't have the jerseys...

It's the team photo.

We need them.

I have them.

Do you have them physically?

- Can you actually touch the fabric?

- Yes.

- You say yes but you mean no.

- Calm down.

It's been three weeks.

- I have them!

- He won't have them.

He doesn't have them,

he won't have them.

For sure.

Listen, I have the jerseys!

You squinted.

Check his eyes!

See that, he squinted!

Enough! Please!

Cdric!

I was stuck in traffic!

30 minutes late.

Help me out.

I need them for the team photo!

Come on then.

I swear I have the jerseys.

You swear but can you really swear?

On our mother's grave.

Leave Mum out of this.

On Dad's life.

Yeah, mm;

What can happen?

They're in the van.

I don't believe you.

Sh*t!

Wait!

Sh*t...

F***...

Sh*t...

Hiya!

You.

I'm so happy to see

Hows it going?

You've got a damn nerve.

You vanish without a word,

then turn up like this?

When you love someone,

you don't just share the good times.

You have to be there

during the bad times too.

When you leave someone,

you lose that privilege.

I never left you, Elsa.

I've just been busy.

Cut the crap!

It's not crap.

I have a lot of work on right now.

We've been dating a year now

and I've never been to your place.

Why can't I come oval?

I never said you couldn't.

But termites

have wrecked my?oorboards.

OK, I get it.

We had water damage

earlier this year...

After that, we had...

fungus on the walls from the damp.

Dry rot. Like leprosy for a house.

So move out, Diego.

It takes time to get it decontaminated.

I'm hiring a drier to speed it up.

I'm pregnant.

And I'll raise it on my own.

What do you mean, on your own?

I'd rather be alone with a baby

than with a weird guy who has no life.

- I have a life.

- You don't, Diego!

You wake pregnant women

at midnight!

I didn't know...

You would

if you called more often!

One day, my kid will ask

what you were like.

I'd rather say you weren't around.

Because, deep down,

you didn't want to be.

I'm here.

- You're lying to yourself.

- No. I'm here.

Elsa, I'm...

For a fraction of a second,I was in shock.

But then the fear faded

and I told myself

it's the best thing

that could happen to me.

Tho, it's 4am.

Go back to bed!

Not in the pool.

In your bed, not in the pool.

Persuade Elsa to get an abortion.

Don't say that in front of your kids!

They knew they're too old

to get aborted.

I'm realizing...

I may well want a kid.

As a free man,

you don't want kids.

- I do.

- You don't.

Kids are...

like black holes, see.

Mini-vampires

that suck up all your energy,

your money, your time,

your hair...

- Remember my hail?

- Sure.

Look...

No hard-ens.

Cut it out, don't talk like that

in front of your kids.

Whatever I say, they never listen.

They hear nothing.

My kids don't pick up

my vocal frequency.

I'd share more with an amoeba.

Cut it out.

Believe me, Dieg.

It's tough getting a full erection.

No wood at my age isn't normal.

I should wake every morning

with a huge tent pole!

Five years age, remember?

You do.

No, I wasn't here.

Every morning,

the circus came to town.

And now...

Go back to bed, sweetheart.

No, not in the pool!

Listen...

I want a kid.

Don't reproduce,

the world's in a bad way.

I want order in my life.

So buy a ring binder.

You call this order?

Elsa!

Sorry...

Give me a second.

I'm here to tell you

I've officially decided

to get my life on track.

Diego, I'm working.

I'll convince you

I can be a father to this kid.

My colleagues don't need to know this.

Give me a minute.

I can't! We're shaking out a guy

who's growing cannabis!

Where?

Asnires.

Listen, I'll prove to you

I can be a father.

OK. GUYS. give me a break.

Come on, let's move it.

Hello, Mr Costa.

I'm Chasseigne, an attorney.

The lock was broken.

I took the liberty of coming in.

I've been trying to reach you,

Mr Costa.

Yo no soy Diego Costa.

Yo soy Carlos Jimenez

I jus' do da cleanin'.

I don't have much time

so I'll get to the point.

From 1988 to 1990,

you took part in research

for my client,

the Valle Fertility Clinic.

You donated sperm 693 times

under the name Fonzy

over 14 months

in return for 47,255 francs.

Around 7,500 euros today.

- No.

- Yes.

A recent administrative inquiry revealed

that as the Valle Clinic

was short of donors.

'Fonzy' was supplied

to numerous patients,

making you the father

of several children

aged between 17 and 22.

You have excellent sperm, sir.

Thank you.

Following the inquiry,

the clinic had to issue

a consanguinity warning.

How many kids?

You fathered 533 children.

142 wish to know who you are.

They've launched a class action

to force the clinic

to reveal your name.

They'll lose under French law,

but international conventions

state that they have the right

to knew their origins.

You signed a confidentiality agreement

with the clinic.

My client will protect you

and defend your right

to anonymity.

But the unusual nature of this case

could lead a judge

to favour their request

over your right to anonymity.

Get ready to defend yourself anyway.

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