Four Against the Bank Page #6

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Schumacher is our Mexican!

But how do we convince Zollner?

I've got it.

She's single.

- No!

While Zollner was interrogating me

she got a text message

from Eternity.

She's single and hunting.

And we'll provide her with prey.

Someone she doesn't

suspect of bank robbery.

Me?

No! No!

We're a team, Max.

I'm not going to prison, got it!

Count me out!

What about the cash?

- It's not worth it!

Some of us can't just

run back to daddy's checkbook!

It's not like that.

- You want your ass powdered with caviar!

I earned every penny! Every penny!

You gonna cry?

- Don't make me kick you.

You kicked me as I looked away.

- I'll make sure you look this time.

Okay, I'll look.

- Okay. Come on!

There's something on your nose.

- Where?

Want me to break your little arm?

- Oh God!

Okay, it's fine!

- What? You give up?

Should we intervene?

I give up! Oh God!

You're in this team till the day you die!

Till I die, and beyond, okay?

That wasn't so hard.

Freddie?

You're not writing.

- No, I'm cooking your favorite meal.

Come, have a taste.

- That's great, thanks!

Yummy! Yummy!

I can explain.

A poker club?

Do you take me for a fool?

How could you?

You're in deep sh*t!

Our girls could grow up without a dad!

- I wasn't totally honest with you.

I gambled with our savings a bit,

but the bank messed up!

It's the bank's fault now?

- Yes, actually.

That's just... unbelievable!

How dare you!

- Please stop.

I know I messed up,

but we just found a way

to get off the hook, keep the cash,

and blame it on a real bastard.

How much money is in the bag?

Two million.

I know what you're going to say.

- I'm so mad at you,

and we'll discuss just how mad I am

with a marriage counselor soon,

but just tell me one thing:

How can I help?

How can I help

so we can keep the money'?

You think we can trust her?

- Of course you can, you twits.

If you're in trouble, so is my husband,

and neither of us want that.

We have to change the hair.

- Give me a minute.

So, take a look.

- I volunteer at a soup kitchen?

I've never done volunteer work.

- Zollner's a woman and so am I.

I know exactly what she wants

to see on a dating profile.

The other one.

We can't use your last name,

or she'll know you lost your money.

Parted in the center?

- Parted in the center? Maybe, yes.

So, your profile name is:

Mad Max.

- What?

And then maybe a dog.

- A dog?

A photo with a cute dog.

- No. I'm allergic.

A cat?

- Come on.

Yes, we need a cat.

- I'm on it.

OVERWORKED, UNDERRATED.

MAKING MY DREAMS COME TRUE.

Thursday night at 8:00?

- 7:
45.

And you're sure Schumacher...

- Every Thursday at 7:45.

He'll take Heidi.

- And his wife?

She's at a charity event.

She's coming! She said yes!

We've got one chance. Let's do it right.

- You think Heidi would like this?

I gave that to you for our anniversary.

- Relax, I know they're not real,

but Heidi won't know.

- They aren't? They were expensive!

FROM A SECRET ADMIRER

That's it?

- That's it.

You can handle that, right?

- Yeah.

And one of you needs

to get this on your wrist.

What does it mean?

- It's Japanese for "universe."

What if we have to describe the guy?

- Yeah, then what?

Wow!

That's the best meal

we've had in a while.

We should do this more often.

Get a babysitter, go out...

Yeah, or rob a bank

and frame a stranger.

I'm really sorry.

I should've told you the truth earlier.

I was just too proud,

or too stupid.

Maybe this whole mess is a sign.

- Yeah?

A sign that it's time

you finally get a new job.

A reliable job.

- Wait a minute. I'm an actor!

Dustin Hoffman taught me.

Not directly, but...

It's show time.

- What?

Welcome. May I take your coat?

But of course.

- Enjoy your meal.

Thanks.

- We will.

Pardon me.

- Watch it! Wait a minute.

Is this yours?

- I'm sorry.

Gloves?

- Pardon my husband.

He's such a klutz.

- I see.

The prices here

can give you the jitters.

How did it go?

- It was a piece of cake.

Here.

Careful.

Elisabeth?

Hi, I'm...

Mad Max.

- Yes, Max.

This is my first internet date, so...

You look enchanting.

- Thanks.

You're welcome.

Oh, yeah.

There you go.

Is everything okay?

- Yes, everything's fine.

I know that man.

A glass of champagne?

- A bottle.

If anything happens,

I'll call your cells.

Okay.

What's with the necklace?

I'd like to thank my secret admirer.

- Admirer?

I'll be sure to let him know.

- Are you role playing?

That's hot.

You're not my secret admirer.

You're my gardener.

And I'm a stripper.

Who desperately needs someone

to water her bush.

His wife is much younger.

She's not his wife.

She's one of his employees.

I know him from the news!

Didn't his bank get...

Not so loud.

- Sorry. Why not?

I'm investigating the case.

Um... Are you a police officer?

Yes.

I head a bank robbery task force.

Okay, that's heavy.

- It's okay if you run. Most men do.

Why would I?

- Who knows.

My profession seems to irritate men.

Well, I think it's,

as my mom would say: sexy.

With a soft "S"?

- Zexy.

Z- Zexy?

- Yeah.

Where'd you learn that?

I had an eventful adolescence.

- Fine with me,

as long as the alarm doesn't go off.

Rocky Balboa!

- Good work!

Touch my ass again and you're toast.

- Got it.

I always played detective as a kid.

See?

Thanks, but I'll have to stop

because you can't understand me.

Yeah.

- Okay, I'll concentrate.

I'll take a guess.

Oh yes, the man appears

to have blood on his fingers.

Or is that just his lover's lipstick?

No, he's definitely guilty.

- Really?

Nice try.

Yeah, but bank director, bank robber.

Aren't they the same in the end?

They are tonight, yes.

But seriously, did you ever consider it?

- What?

In every good murder mystery,

the most unlikely suspect

is the most likely suspect.

But what do I know?

All I know is, I'd have to rob a bank

to give a girl a necklace like that.

More champagne?

It's just a thought.

What about carpentry?

You've got a talent for furniture.

Remember the doll house you built

for the girls?

Would you ask a heart surgeon

to sell shoes?

Or ask an astronaut to make sausages?

You can't compare

heart surgery to acting.

Of course not.

Acting takes years of training.

OFFSHORE BANKING

Sh*t!

Are you okay?

- I...

swallowed my chewing gum.

Car.

Oh, sh*t!

Sh*t, sh*t, sh*t!

Okay, I understand.

The thing is...

Chris can't move.

He can't move!

Crap! Hey, you have to get up!

- I can't!

I think I'm paralyzed.

Oh, God, I'm paralyzed!

I'll never f*** again!

It's not that bad, trust me.

- Not that bad?

Can you feel this?

Heinrich?

- Good, you're not paralyzed. It's shock.

I'll help you out of here, okay?

On three. One, two...

three!

Holy sh*t! Suzanne!

Chris!

You're Mrs Schumacher?

- Last time I checked.

God, was that a 7 iron?

- A 5 iron. Too much swing?

I didn't feel a thing.

- Can you tell me why you're in my house?

It's a long story.

- Do I want to hear it?

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