Four Rooms Page #2

TED:

Sam the bellboy. Now there was a man.

BETTY:

Yeah. Oh, hi, Teddy. Ready to start the night shift?

TED:

Yeah.

BETTY:

Well, let me buy you a drink.

TED:

You wanna buy me a drink? I'm starting my shift.

BETTY:

You're not an alcoholic, are you; one drink won't kill you.

TED:

Yeah, sure.

They walk out of frame. In the empty frame we

SUPER:
NEW YEAR'S EVE 7:00 P.M.

INT. BACK ROOM--NIGHT

Betty and Ted sit in the back room, both with drinks in their hand. This

dialogue is to be delivered rapid fire, Howard Hawks style.

BETTY:

After fifty years, Sam retires, and you're taking over the night shift.

TED:

Correct.

BETTY:

You're filling some mighty big shoes.

TED:

Oh, I know.

BETTY:

Sam was a legend in the hotel business.

TED:

Oh, I know . . .

BETTY:

A bellhop's bellhop.

TED:

An inspiration to us all.

BETTY:

He ran the night desk for fifty years, all by himself.

TED:

An amazing man.

BETTY:

No desk clerk. No night man. No help. Just f***in' Sam,

and his wits.

TED:

A man alone.

BETTY:

And you're gonna do the same.

TED:

I know.

BETTY:

Tonight.

Ted spews his drink.

TED:

Tonight!

BETTY:

Yes, tonight.

TED:

I can't.

BETTY:

Yes, you can.

TED:

No, I can't. I never worked the night shift before.

BETTY:

Oh night shift--smight shift.

TED:

We were supposed to work it together.

BETTY:

I know, but I can't.

TED:

Why not?

BETTY:

I'm having a New Year's Eve party.

TED:

Since when?

BETTY:

Actually, I'm not having it. My roommate is. And there's

this guy. German guy. He's gonna be there. And so am I.

TED:

I can't run this place by myself.

BETTY:

Oh, sure ya can.

TED:

No, I can't.

BETTY:

Sam ran this place by himself for fifty years.

TED:

Yeah, and he had fifty years of f***in' practice, too. I

haven't had a day.

BETTY:

Look, Teddy, calm down--

TED:

--Don't call me Teddy.

BETTY:

Ted, the night's cake. It's easy. The day's when it's busy.

During the night there's nothing to do.

TED:

It's New Year's Eve.

BETTY:

Which'll make it less busy than normal. Ever worked on

Christmas? Unless you sell turkeys, business is dead. You

just got butterflies, that's all.

TED:

What I have ain't butterflies. I can't handle this hotel all by myself.

Betty slows the scene down.

BETTY:

Okay, let's calm down a minute. Slow it down, cool it off.

Let's just talk.

TED:

You can say any goddamn thing you want--

BETTY:

--Ted? I thought we were calming down? I thought we were

cooling off? No hostility. Say good-bye to hostility. We're

just talking.

TED:

Okay . . . okay . . . okay . . . I'm calm, I'm cool, let's talk.

BETTY:

Ted, in a nutshell, all you have to do is hold the fort. It's

New Year's Eve. Most of the guests are going out. You'll

just be giving them a little nod as they come staggering in

at three . . . four . . . five . . . in the morning. Nobody's

having any parties, a few get-togethers, but no parties. You

got about three people checking in tonight, that's it. The

only variable is Chester Rush in the penthouse.

TED:

Chester Rush? The guy from The Wacky Detective?

BETTY:

Yeah, him and his entourage checked in last night. They're

in the penthouse. The only reason I refer to it as a variable

is that he's a movie star. Ya never know about movie stars.

I'm tellin' ya, Ted, it's cake.

Betty takes a piece of paper and writes her number down.

BETTY:

(continuing)

And look, if you have any problems, call me at the party.

Ted thinks about it for a moment.

TED:

Okay.

BETTY:

Great--

TED:

--For fifty bucks.

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