Frankie and Johnny Page #2

She likes to chase Limos.

She has delusions of grandeur.

I know how to walk a dog.

We do have these things in Kentucky.

Kentucky! I'm dating Huck Finn!

- Nice to meet you, Frankie.

- You too, Big Pepper.

So, have I found Shangri-La?

- He's nice.

- That's a rotten thing to say.

He's very nice!

What do you want me to say?

I leave you alone for two seconds...

I know. I said I'd never

fall in love again.

- Where did that get me?

- Don't get dramatic.

It's an occupational hazard.

I love watching TV with you,

I hope we'll best friends

the rest of our lives

but there's a whole world out there,

it's no use pretending there's not

just because our feelings got hurt

or there's some virus.

I know.

But I'm going for a VCR.

A VCR. I hope it comes

with a lot of attachments.

- Is that a life?

- Send out for a pizza, rent a film.

That's dinner and a movie

and I don't have to deal with some

schmuck putting his tongue in my ear.

What is the topic of discussion

when lepidopterists get together?

Butterflies.

- Gems?

- No, ma'am. Butterflies or moths.

You've been to college,

you should know that.

I'm fine.

I'm fine.

Give her a kiss.

Give her a nice kiss.

Want some bran?

May as well just eat rope

and yank it through.

Come on!

You have feet, you have shoes! Run!

Papa! Are you OK?

- What's happening?

- Don't poke! Please.

Hi, are you buying? I'm on sale.

I'll pay you Thursday.

How you doing?

Hi. Looking for company?

- I don't know. What's the rate now?

- $100. Cash.

I appreciate the offer

but that's a little out of my...

Listen, it's slow tonight.

We can talk.

- You wanna talk? OK, let's...

- So, what do you like?

What about the spoon position?

What you gonna do to me

in the spoon position?

Party time.

- Celeste, no...

- Christine.

Yeah, well, clothes on.

You know what I mean?

Clothes on, spoon position.

I will go on with dynamite.

People got to be able to see

as well as hear.

Watch this, I'll do Bette Davis...

You all right, man.

That's like a move, ain't it?

All right! Chop that celery!

- That's a good way to lose a finger.

- Do it, baby.

I had a cousin, he lost two fingers

at his last job.

- He can't even tie his own shoes.

- Come on!

- I wear loafers anyway.

- Frankie, come here.

Look at this guy, he's a hot dog.

He's cute, though.

He's got a cute little ass.

- Why don't you tell him?

- I think I will. Hey, Zorro!

Anybody ever tell you

you got a cute ass?

- Last job I had.

- Are you blushing?

Stop bothering the new guy.

Everybody get to work for a change.

Scrambled with bacon, two easy-overs

with sausage and a Belgian waffle.

I'm Johnny. Who are you?

These eggs aren't runny.

Mr DeLeon likes them runny.

They look runny to me.

They're pretty runny.

- He's a regular.

- Who can argue with that?

And who can argue with you?

"Thy head is full of quarrel

like an egg is full of meat."

Romeo and Juliet. I'm reading it now.

Act three, scene one.

I can't find it now.

OK, raw eggs coming up.

Not raw, runny.

Wait a minute. Stop!

Nick, the pie machine's gone berserk.

Look, if he jumps, he jumps

but they never do.

I gotta go, I'll call you later.

Yeah, bye.

- What do you think of him?

- Who?

- The guy. The new guy.

- He just started, Cora.

I've been checking him out.

Something about him I don't like.

I know what you mean. Some wise guy.

No, it's the headband.

- He is cute.

- You always see something cute.

- I'm lucky like that.

- Is Helen still out?

She'll be back tomorrow.

You know what your problem is?

You're too picky.

Women like that always have

opinions about women like us.

- How do those look?

- Perfect!

You girls take such good care of me.

I know, I should have said ladies!

No, you should have said women.

Frankie, you're looking at

a very old dog.

In my time I've said tootsies,

dolls, gals, chicks, babes,

sometimes even broads -

that's when I was a young man.

When I was a young man,

the wonder-drug was Mercurochrome.

Did I tell you my daughter-in-law

wants me to call her Ms?

I put up with her

because of my grandchildren.

Have I shown you pictures of them?

Want to see them again?

Some of them are out of focus.

Peter, telephone.

How can VCRs be so complicated?

- What's his story?

- Ask Cora.

She after him already? She's fast!

Like a bullet!

Maybe Jorge knows about VCRs.

That boy?

All he got on his mind is p*ssy.

You open his head,

you'll find little hairy triangles.

Frankie, come here.

The professor from the college just

stuck his hand up my skirt again.

OK. You pour, I'll bump.

- Let me freshen that up for you.

- I always like more.

It's very cold.

I am so sorry! Are you all right?

I'm so sorry.

Helen's in the hospital.

Her neighbour just called.

She thinks this is it.

15 years she works here.

It's a long time.

Do you think she knows we're here?

I don't know.

It's a hospital.

Helen, honey, it's Cora.

Can you hear me?

Excuse me. Could you leave now?

Helen has another visitor.

We're leaving.

We're gonna go now.

We'll be back tomorrow.

Do you think we're gonna

end up like this? Alone.

She's not alone.

She's alone.

Easy. We'll need something under

his head. Let me have your jacket.

Back off, OK? Give him a little room.

- It's not like your father's...

- What's going on?

- Where's Nick?

- At the hospital.

- What's wrong?

- He's having a fit.

Call an ambulance.

- I love...

- What is wrong with you?

That's my girlfriend!

He's just sitting there,

then he falls like a ton of bricks.

Stand back.

We need an ambulance, please. The

Apollo restaurant, 23rd and Ninth.

Is there a doctor here?

Is anybody a doctor here?

- You're dressed like a nurse.

- I'm a dental technician.

- We're gonna need an ambulance.

- They're on the way.

You gotta get him on his side

so he can breathe right.

Where did you learn that?

Campfire Girl...

I don't remember. Is he epileptic?

- Yeah, I think...

- Sure? It could be drugs.

Drugs? He don't look like

an addict to me. What is it?

Epilepsy!

Yeah, he's epileptic.

Go back to your tables, he's fine.

The ambulance is coming. Thank you.

Thanks for cooperating.

Free coffee for everyone.

- Give everyone...

- Nick'll kill you.

You can make that call now, Jorge.

Your name is Frankie, right?

- I'm Johnny.

- I know.

Frankie And Johnny, the song.

Yeah, I've heard of it.

Is he breathing all right?

Yeah. Frankie and Johnny

were sweethearts...

- I don't think he's breathing right.

- He's breathing.

- Why not go out with me tonight?

- What?

I'm asking you out with me tonight,

on a date.

He just asked her out.

- I don't believe this.

- What's not to believe?

No. Keep him company.

I'll wait for the ambulance.

- Welcome to the world.

- What happened?

Nothing much. I just got

turned down by some woman.

You're gonna be fine.

Hey, Lucy.

I'm actually in Rego Park.

Look who's here.

What's he doing here?

He didn't know her.

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