Frat Party Page #4

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Hey... Mandy?

- That's Megan.

- Whatever.

# 'Cause when you're with me #

# I get this feeling inside #

# Catch me scream

in the streets #

# "I'm alive!

I've alive!" #

# You got me all shook up

and I ain't never coming down #

- # He's my #

- # Ah ah ah ah #

- # Sunshine #

- # Ah ah ah ah #

# Baby paints

in the most glorious colors #

# You ever did see... #

(screams)

(vocalizing)

# I get around, I get around,

I get get get #

# Get around #

# One day, if I get my way #

# I'm a fixin' so our names #

- # Are gonna be the same #

- (cheering)

# Have a walk in the sun,

my only one #

# We gonna tear it up #

# Tear it up,

tear it up #

# Tear it up, tear it up #

# Tear it up,

tear it up #

# Tear it up,

baby, tear it up. #

Yeah!

- Oh!

- Looks good, buddy.

Looks good, but you know what?

It is a little normal.

- Yeah.

- Normal? What are you talking about?

Dude dude...

where's the pop-a-top spotter?

Chad:

Uh, right there.

Hey, Vincent!

What's up, Vinny!

Where are the girls at?

(guys cheering)

Good eyes, bro.

Good eyes.

- That's what I'm talking about.

- But that's still normal.

- It's normal.

- Normal? Dude, strip beer pong!

(all cheering)

Whoo!

All:

Oh!

- Normal!

- Oh my God.

You know what?

You guys... you guys are hard to impress,

but follow me,

both of you...

- Uh-huh?

...to the theme rooms.

- Theme rooms!

- Oh my!

Mac:

Theme rooms!

(man vocalizing)

(hip-hop music playing)

Gentlemen, I simply call this room...

"The Club."

- Nice.

- Wow.

Chad, it is looking

much much better.

Please save your compliments

until the end of the tour.

- Move, come on.

- I'm going.

# You know it's like fire #

# I ain't tired,

I feel wired #

# It's my desire... #

Thanks.

(sighs)

- You worried?

- No.

(sighs)

(pop music playing)

# Change your pace... #

Duffy:

Oh, that's good right there, yeah.

Show me some more of that.

Gentlemen, welcome

to my perverted palace

of "pussay."

# You stop for me,

can't hardly breathe... #

Awesome.

I'm speechless.

Yeah, sometimes

I even outdo myself.

- Hey, Kell. You in line?

- Hey.

Why not?

To get photographed by Pablo?

Kelly:

No, I'm gonna get photographed

by you, bachelor boy.

- Surprise!

- You're a bachelor.

It's your party.

Time to f***in' party!

- Kelly:
Whoo!

- Yeah! Come on, dude!

- Yeah, it's my turn.

- Wait, I'm not done, I'm not done.

- Oh, stop...

- Duffy, come on.

You're gonna shoot me.

Look. Look look look.

You're not gonna touch,

you're just gonna shoot.

- Chad:
Oh my God. You've gotta...

- Shh!

No offense,

but l... I can't do that.

# So beg me... #

Um, I'm... I'm a little insulted.

I said no offense,

but if you're a little offended,

I'm sorry, Kell because...

Are you f***ing kidding me?

You know what?

Screw you. Pablo!

That's your name, right?

You want to shoot me?

- Pablo:
Hell yeah.

- Kelly:
All right, let's go.

Bye! See you later!

Yeah, run along! Run along!

- I'm sorry.

- Kelly:
Yeah, whatever.

- I love your tits.

- Kelly:
Uh-huh.

- (all chattering)

- Kelly:
Yeah, it's cool. Whatever.

- Give me the tiger... tiger.

- (hisses)

That's... that's the sh*t

I'm talking about right there, dude.

That's that sh*t.

# I hope this will do for me... #

Duff.

- Duff. Duffy.

- Chad.

- Duffy.

- Chad.

- (laughs)

- Duffy!

Chad, what the f***?

Well, uh, I'm sad.

We're both sad.

- Because?

- You're getting married.

- You're getting married, bro!

- Both:
You're getting married!

Married forever!

Forever married!

I know, I'm getting married.

I'm sorry.

Well, because we love you,

- we got you a present.

- A big present.

- Big present!

- I'm so jealous.

- I'm so jealous!

- It's like the best present ever.

Okay, what is it?

- Porn star!

- Porn star, bro!

- Motherfuckin' porn star!

- Porn star!

What the f***

are you talking about?

Right there behind this door

is a real live human

f***ing porn star

for you to f*** the sh*t out of!

- Yeah, that's a good one.

- In your room, porn star, for you, Duff.

Duffy, if there is not a porn star

in that room

when you open the door,

I will personally suck your dick.

There is no f***ing way

that there is a porn star

in this Gamma House

in my room.

- Oh, really?

- Yes.

Okay, well, how about this? Bam!

Duffy, right?

Duffy:

Hey. Yeah.

Hello.

Oh, God.

Mission accomplished.

It's really on, dude.

He's not going to know.

(laughing)

I know.

I need Vicodin.

You're... you're Jesse Jane.

You have really

considerate friends, Duffy.

Yeah.

You know, I don't offer myself

to a lot of people.

(pop music playing)

- You don't?

- Uh-uh.

I'm doing this

as a favor for Chad.

Yeah, I mean, porn's different,

but on the other hand,

I'm a really nice girl.

Yeah, you look like a nice girl.

I'm from a really small town.

- I'm from a small town.

- Where at?

Oklahoma.

No way, I'm from Oklahoma.

We... we actually

went to the same high school.

- We did?

- Yeah.

- Have I met you?

- No, but we brushed arms one time

like walking by.

Huh. Well,

what's it gonna be,

bachelor boy?

Um... um...

what... what do you mean?

This is a once-in-a-lifetime

opportunity.

You're cute.

I owe Chad a favor

and you're getting married.

- Mm-hmm.

- Mm-hmm.

So do you want

to have sex with me?

Uh... s... yeah... sex with...

with... with... with you?

Sex with me.

Sex with... with you.

Are you hard of f***ing hearing?

- (moans)

- Oh, sh*t.

I'm not... I'm actually

not hard of hearing.

- But you're hard.

- Yeah.

Um, this is...

this is incredible,

- I need to tell you.

- Mm, yeah.

- Oh my God.

- (moaning)

- Take you clothes off.

- My... my clothes too?

- Yeah, I want your clothes off.

- Okay.

- Come on.

- I've gotta get this button.

Come on. Oh, come on,

take your clothes off!

- Okay, yeah yeah...

- I'm horny.

F*** me, Duffy!

F*** me, Duffy!

- (Duffy muttering)

- (Jesse moaning)

- Jesse:
Oh, God.

- Duffy:
Oh, yeah.

- Okay. That's nice.

- (moaning loudly)

You know what?

You know what? L... l...

l... I can't. I can't.

I can't... I can't do this. I'm sorry.

- What?!

- It's just that...

I'm getting married tomorrow.

- So...

- What the f***!

- It's just...

- (gasps)

I, um... you're really hot, but...

Do you know how many guys

turn me down topless?

- Three?

- None, you f***!

Jesse, listen, um...

good Lord, you know?

- (sighs)

- I'm attracted to you.

It's... it's... I just...

Jesse:

No sh*t?

I really want to do you.

You know, I love my fiance.

Really? That's sweet.

But you're missing out

on a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

I wish that I was a dog and that I was

still a freshman or a sophomore

or a junior

or it was beginning of senior year

because I would

f*** the living sh*t out of you.

But you know what?

L... I would never hurt my girlfriend.

Are you sure there's

nothing you wouldn't do?

Um... but...

Nothing at all you wouldn't wanna...

try out?

Yeah yeah, okay.

Let's stop.

Let's just stop

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