Fright Night 2

(NEON SIGN BUZZING)

(WIND WHISTLING SOFTLY)

(SHUTS OFF ENGINE)

- (SOFT SNARLlNG)

- (GASPS)

(WIND WHISTLING SOFTLY)

(WHISPERS IN FRENCH)

- (ROARING)

- (SCREAMING)

- (SNARLlNG, GROWLING)

- (SCREAMING)

(SHRIEKING)

Help me! Anyone!

Help me!

(SCREAMING, WHlMPERING)

Anyone!

(ROARING)

(SCREAMS)

(GRUNTS)

(MOANS SOFTLY)

(SNARLS)

(SOFT MUZAK PLAYS)

(SOBBING)

Hey! Hey!

- (SNIFFLES)

- (DIALS PHONE)

- (SNARLS)

- (SCREAMING)

(SNARLING, SCREAMING CONTINUES)

(CRACKING)

( SPACE NEEDLE:
"WHITE COW")

What are you waiting for?

- Amy.

- Hi.

- So... Romania, huh?

- Yeah, Romania.

Just like we planned.

Yeah, I guess some plans do work out.

Listen, Amy, I wanted to talk to you...

Charley, we're not gonna

do this here, OK?

What's done is done.

You've just got to move on.

Are you ever gonna trust me again?

I need to check into my room.

Hey, wait.

I, uh...

I bought you these.

Charley.

That's really nice.

I really need to check into my room.

(GROWLS, LAUGHS)

Relax, Charley.

You know what they say,

"When in Romania," right?

It's Rome, Evil.

"When in Rome." You dumbass.

Hey.

You coming on the Bloodsucker

Blues Tour with me tonight?

Bloodsucker what?

Midnight tours of all the castles

rumored to be the lairs

of the original vampires.

The Cachtice, the Bran, the Poenari,

the Hunyad, the Orava.

- First one's tonight.

- I guess it could be kind of cool.

Attaboy.

We need a night out on the town,

now that you're single again.

- I'm not single.

- She forgave you?

- For cheating on her?

- I didn't cheat on her.

Hey, didn't one of her friends

see you kissing another girl

- then text Amy...

- Drop it, Ed.

Just sayin'

Looks like the Dynamic Duo's

together again.

- Great.

- And don't lose these.

There's a $50 replacement fee.

Check out the blood bags on that,

Brewster. (LAUGHS)

Ooh! (LAUGHS)

MAN ON TABLET DEVlCE: On this

week's episode of Fright Night:

This building became the centerpiece

for the Nazis' obsession

with the paranormal

when occult researchers

discovered a prehistoric monster.

This dilapidated Nazi insane asylum

was home to one of the most

notorious monsters in history.

You know, out of respect,

I'm gonna give it a week,

then I'm gonna try

my hardest to tap that.

Oh, yeah?

Oh, wait. Wait, wait.

Tap that.

Free market, bro.

Hey, Ed, check this out!

(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

Ed! Hey, Ed, come quick!

- What the f***?

- Quick!

Look!

Whoa...

Stonework... on an old building.

- Imagine that.

- Wha...?

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Down in the lobby

in ten minutes, boys.

First class at the university

is tonight.

Sir, yes, sir.

Hey, want to know

what I'm watching?

Uh, a sex tape your mom made?

Ha! Yeah, very funny, b*tch.

I'm watching an old episode

of Fright Night.

- Want to know why?

- Not really. No.

In the honor of reality TV

monster hunter extraordinaire,

Peter Vincent.

He who has no fright of the night.

And according to his Twitter,

he's in Romania as we speak

filming a new episode.

(SCOFFS)

(TENSE THEME MUSIC PLAYS)

(THUNDER CRASHES)

PETER:
On this week's

episode of Fright Night:

I find myself all alone

inside the infamous Poenari Castle.

Home of Vlad the lmpaler,

aka... Dracula.

Many historians have tried

to find the unmarked grave

where Vlad Tepes...

...allegedly rests.

- But to no avail.

- (LOW GROWLING)

So legend has it

that a vampire still haunts the halls

of this ancient castle.

- There once...

- (LOW GROWLING)

What was that?

There's something in here

with me and it just took off.

I'm gonna turn the light on

on my camera mount...

...and get a better view.

- (WHOOSHING SOUND)

- Ah! Cut!

Get your sh*t together, people!

How many times do I have to tell you

to stay away

from the f***ing camera, huh?

I mean, there's only one...

Stop that! There's only one.

How hard can it be?

How hard can it be?

Give me that. Turn the light off.

- Are we ready?

- MAN:
Yes.

Shut up. And... action.

CHARLEY:
I swear I saw her.

EVIL:
Sorry, dude.

I didn't see no MlLF at the window.

CHARLEY:
Whatever.

(INISTINCT CHATTER)

Free market, bro. (CHUCKLES)

What? I'm kidding. Chill.

- A**hole.

- Don't get upset. Geez.

- CHARLEY:
What happened?

- EVIL:
The lights are off.

What's that for?

- (OMINOUS THEME MUSIC PLAYS)

- EVIL:
What's going on?

Oh, my God.

What the f***?

Ay, caramba!

That's our professor?

- (MUSIC FADES)

- Hello, everyone.

- My name is Gerri Dandridge,

- Hey, Gerri...

and I'm the visiting professor

at this university.

Over the next week that you are here,

I want to give you an overview

of the history of European art,

a history that is riddled

with blood and madness,

brilliance and glory.

A history that,

when I am through with you,

you will feel as though

you have actually lived through it.

Ready to begin?

MAN:
Please follow me.

This is very interesting.

Now, believe it or not,

the most famous vampire of all,

Bram Stoker's Dracula was actually...

...a woman.

Yes?

I thought Bram Stoker based Dracula

on Vlad the lmpaler.

In part, yes.

But why, if there are no accounts

of Vlad drinking blood,

does Stoker's Dracula consume blood

and then seem to appear younger

after doing so?

- Elizabeth Bthory.

- AKA... Countess Dracula.

I'm gonna find a bathroom

and get a drink of water.

- I'm wiped.

- Now we should move on.

The next story

is even more interesting.

Elizabeth Bthory

buried her victims,

who were mostly

adolescent peasant virgins,

in graveyards

and other unknown locations.

(SOFT MOANING)

MAN:
Oh, yeah.

(MOANING CONTINUES)

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Oh, baby.

Oh, God. (LAUGHS)

Oh...

(MOUTHING) Charley.

- Charley.

- Oh!

- Are you OK?

- Yeah.

I was just, uh...

still searching for the bathroom.

Yeah, well, tour's over.

We should get going.

Yeah. OK.

(RAPID TICKING)

(EVIL SNORING)

Down in the lobby

in half an hour, boys.

First class of the day is at 8:00 a.m.

- (EVIL YAWNS)

- (CUCKOO CLOCK SOUNDS)

Van Gogh's paintings show him

identifying with his subjects

so deeply they merge

into one identity.

A single image of multiple people,

he turns into them,

and they turn into him.

In his desire

to transcend time and place,

he chooses a palette so vivid,

it burns into the spectator's memory

and remains within him forever.

- (SNIFFING)

- Hey!

Yes, Mr. Brewster?

I, um...

(LAUGHS)

Like what you saw last night, Charley?

(SCREAMS)

(ALL LAUGHING)

(GASPING)

Are we keeping you from your beauty

sleep, Mr. Brewster?

(ALL LAUGHING)

You didn't answer my question.

Excuse me?

I know you liked what you saw.

As with the self-portrait van Gogh

dedicated to Paul Gauguin,

his face morphs into an almost

Buddhist monk-like appearance.

- Is everything OK?

- Yeah.

Yeah, I think so.

I, um...

I bought you...

I bought you these.

They're my favorites.

That's, uh... that's ...

That's really lovely of you, Charley.

I mean it.

Oh... For me? (CHUCKLES)

She loves me, she loves me not,

she loves me, she loves me not.

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