Full Frontal Page #2

---

to your friend, | I know he's Jewish,

and I went way too far | with that whole oven thing,

But believe me,

some of my anger management | stuff last night,

and I really feel like | I had another breakthrough,

That's great. That's great.

But I just... oh, I felt so bad,

You know what,

You are our Hitler, | Don't you ever forget that, OK?

That means a lot,

your and Carl's vision... | I mean, you wrote this,

But, yeah, it's funny, | I was talking to Tom Sizemore,

and he was saying the only way | to learn how to act is to act,

- Right, Yes, | - And I know you're concerned,

because I haven't really | memorized anything,

and I've been | all over the place,

but believe me, on the day... | well, you know, tonight...

yeah, I really think | it's gonna be salty,

You're gonna be OK.

I just want to make sure | you're all right,

- I'm good, | - OK, All right,

- See you later, | - Oh, hey, Um,

I don't take cream,

- Sure, | - Thanks, pal,

All right.

" Bad boys, bad boys, | what you gonna do?"

" What you gonna do | when they come for you?"

LINDA:
| Well, no, not married.

This guy that I was seeing...

This guy Tom that I was seeing | last year at this time...

said when he broke up with me, | he said he was...

getting back together | with an ex-girlfriend...

but I don't know | if that's true or not.

I heard he's... | I heard it's not true.

But that's what he said | at the time.

- Hey! | - Hey, how are you?

- I'm OK, how are you? | - Good, good,

It's funny,

Yeah, what are the odds, right?

Well, uh, have a good day, | See you,

LINDA:
I like Carl.

Uh, have you ever been | in therapy?

Who?

No, I don't even get that,

I don't even get that, | It's like,

they're just selling you | back to yourself,

What is that?

Hmm, | I never thought of it that way,

- Mm-hmm, | - Um,

your appetite | is certainly worth noting,

- I'm hungry, | - Mm-hmm,

Oh, don't tell me

- You don't eat? | - Oh, no, I eat,

I just don't eat airplane food,

Why not? It's first class,

They cook the sh*t | on the premises,

What's the problem?

I'll wait for the cookies,

Man, how corrupt | was your father?

And milk,

Did he kill people?

He killed their spirits,

Did he threaten | their identities?

Something like that,

So, what about you?

He, um,

No, no, that's all right, | Sorry,

- No, | - OK,

No, he didn't,

- "Adored"? | - Mm-hmm,

Wow,

I don't think | I've ever been adored,

CARL:
You can get paid | to have sex by a company...

I mean, | acting in an adult film...

but if some guy pays you | five hundred bucks...

to have sex with him, | that's illegal.

So, you're in porn.

Why are you in porn? | Two reasons.

Either you need the money, | or you're an exhibitionist.

WOMAN:
What do you think | is exhibitionism?

CARL:
Porn.

What... well, no, OK. | That's a good question.

I think it goes way beyond | just wanting to perform.

You can't pretend that you're | having sex with someone...

when you are actually | having sex with them.

Well, I think

that they're | enjoying themselves,

Or maybe they want you | to enjoy yourselves,

Why would you want | to think about it so much?

It's been made to turn you on, | It's nothing deeper than that,

Yes, I do,

Sorry, I thought you said | this didn't bother you,

Carl, I can't have

You can't?

I've met someone,

- Oh, | - It's not appropriate anymore,

Oh, I understand,

Don't be... sorry? Hey, you are | showing absolute respect,

by being honest with me and not | being weird or, you know,

protracted about it, | Thank you,

I just... hey, I like to know | where I stand,

Otherwise,

Are you all right?

Yep,

Yeah, I was just thinking | of the rest of my day,

Jerry wants to meet with me,

- Really? | - Yes,

He's never liked me,

Just... nothing I can do | about that, I just, uh...

I'm sure you'll do just fine.

LEE:
You are aware | of the recent layoffs, correct?

MAN:
Well, yes.

LEE:
We're making some changes, | rearranging our priorities...

getting things straight, | that sort of thing.

Mmm, Are you a smoker, Brian?

I participate | when it's available,

- Are you a smoker? | - No, but I smoke,

Have you ever been caught | driving under the influence?

Under the influence of what?

"DUl"... | you're familiar with the term,

Yeah,

- Correct? | - Yeah,

No, I mean,

Do you vote | democrat or republican?

Neither, Either, | I... I vote for the best person,

- And how do you judge that? | - Uh,

- Do you know in an instant? | - Yes,

Right,

Hmm,

Oh, come on, kitten...

You know,

Nothing's changed,

since the last time | we had this discussion,

No, I'm just... | I'm too committed to my work,

to sustain a serious | relationship right now,

You know, I bring work | home with me, I'm distracted,

I'm taking a swim in Lake Me, | you know?

And, you... hey, you deserve | better, believe you me,

I would only cause you pain,

Remember how I let you | twirl my key chain?

Nice, right? | Hugging, kissing, all nice,

Now, go on, sweetie, | Go on, split, Come on, come on,

I'll call you,

If the phone doesn't ring, | it's probably me,

Oh, man,

F***ing Goebbels... | he thinks it's a toy,

"Gone to get haircut,"

What an a**hole,

LINDA:
I don't know why, | I just started that.

I don't... I just don't want | them knowing me, you know?

I don't want them knowing me.

I give... I give the name "Ann" | all the time...

because it seems like Ann is...

One,

And it's less invasive.

It's less... | or more anonymous, you know?

More invisible. | If they know me as Ann...

they don't know who really | is in the room with them.

And for some reason, | that feels good to me.

CAL VIN:
"Nicholas. | I will begin simply.

"I love you,

"Have always loved you,

"and will always love you,

"Ever since the moment | I met you,

"the love I feel for you | is overwhelming,

"When we are apart, | you are all I think about,

"and can't wait until,

"we are just even | in the same room again,

"Until then,"

I've been away a lot,

Ahem,

- Hi, | - Hi,

- Hey, Mike? | - Yes?

- Can I ask you a question? | - Yes,

- It's kind of personal, | - Shoot,

Is that your real hair?

Absolutely.

Hmm, I'm thinking of | getting some more,

Don't do that.

- Why not? | - You'll have doll head,

I don't care, I want more hair,

Low-level, free-floating | anxiety about it, you know?

I have anxiety about it,

I see homeless guys | with a full head of hair,

and I think,"What the f***?"

You know, Kirk Douglas, | what the f***...

Does Lee mind?

Uh, she says no,

Well, that's a lie,

She doesn't say anything, | and I assume that's a no,

We sit in the same room,

but, uh,

- "And," | - What?

Try changing your "but"s | to "and"s, See what happens,

We live in the same house,

Now you got it,

Yes, I would say that,

- How often? | - Um,

Once a week, once a month,

- This is kind of... | - I'll come back to that,

God,

Do you believe in him?

Well, you know, | not like a bearded guy...

It's a yes or no question, | David,

Yes, then,

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes