Full Moon High Page #7

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The firefighter's got the doctor.

No, the jumpers got the firefighter.

You wanna

fight, fight like a man!

I saw 12 year old girls

fight better than that.

12 year old girls with chin boogers.

He shamed him down.

Jesus, what a couple of jerks.

They didn't even try to fly.

Thanks for coming, Doctor.

In a minute, you'll see him in

either the flesh or the fur.

He hasn't turned into

much of anything yet.

Tony this is the famous Dr. Brand.

Hello.

So, you turn into a wolf.

Who cares, you think

you're the only werewolf?

Eastern Europe is full of your kind,

and if we wanted more

werewolves in this country

we would send for them!

Are you sure this is the right man?

You expected somebody

who'd kiss your ass,

didn't you big shot?

What's so great about taking

a step backwards in evolution?

I'd like to see a wolf turn into a man!

That would be progress!

You should be ashamed of yourself!

I think I'd better leave

before I attack the doctor myself.

Oh please, please.

Please, just go join a band, will ya!

Doc, I'm getting that odd feeling again.

Oh yes, would you like

to describe it to me?

Well, you know in the cartoons

when the mouse reaches down into the cat

and turns him inside out?

Hold on, hold on.

Let's get all this great

dialog down on tape.

This is Dr. Brand speaking.

Thank you, thank you, hold the applause.

Testing, one two three, testing.

Excuse me, would you mind

not talking when I am, please?

It muddies up the tape.

We're in the Full Moon county jail

with a deranged student now,

who thinks he's a werewolf.

Do you have a mirror handy?

Downstairs in the men's room.

I'm not interested in your fetishes.

We can deal with that at some later date.

Would you go get it, please,

and bring it back to me?

If you can, without breaking it,

so that the sickie here

can tell me what he's sees,

as opposed to what we, the healthy, see?

It'll only take a minute Doc.

With you it'll take

a week, run slowpoke!

I don't have all night for

this jackass experiment!

While we're alone,

would you sign this, please,

and don't bother to read it.

You wouldn't understand it anyway.

Hey, I said don't read it!

This says you want me to

sign my body over to science.

You don't expect me to piss away

a perfectly good werewolf, do you?

Besides, my wife is looking

for a fur coat this winter.

What kind of a doctor would gyp a guy

out of his own body, huh?

Oh, it's really getting bad now, Doc.

Look at this, the hair's

coming out on my hands,

and my nails are growing.

Can you see this?

You should be taking notes on this.

Then it's true, a real werewolf.

Well, you've got the right to say it,

Dr. Norman Brand is a schmuck.

I thought you

were Dr. Jacob Brand?

I am, Norman Brand is my father.

He was a schmuck.

$5.00 for a house call.

Yeah, $5.00 for a

house call is very reasonable.

Speak up, Mowgli, let's

get this down on tape.

I gotta get to the game.

Make that touchdown,

break the jinx.

Okay, Narcissus, open up the cell,

so I can administer the hypodermic.

I haven't any authority

to let you in there.

Must you tell everybody

the extremities of your IQ?

Now, repeat after me, I am a moron.

Good, now open the door

and hold up the mirror,

so I can show this guy

what a jerk he's making out of himself.

You're gonna have to hold the mirror,

because I'm gonna have my

hands full with my gun.

Okay.

Um.

Hang on to that, will you?

Thank you.

This won't drug me, will it?

No no, I have the drugs.

You have a little plastic thing.

Would you be so kind as

to open the door now?

Yes, sir.

Thank you.

Would you hold my gun?

I'd be delighted.

Excuse me for one minute.

What, what?

You see the tape

recorder sitting on there?

Yes, I do.

If you open the door,

it will fall to the floor

causing me great expense,

and you a hit on the head.

I already broke my

walkie-talkie like that.

It's open.

I can hardly believe it.

My how proud you must be.

Well, why don't we slide the

little bugger down the wall?

I'm going in.

All right, calm yourself down now.

This is simply a shot to put you to sleep,

so that when I skin you,

it will not be unbelievably painful.

Oh, oh, oh, shoot him, shoot him.

Shoot him better.

Jesus, you broke the camera.

A wolf man in the cell

and he shoots the camera.

Did he get the cameraman too?

Loomis, are you okay?

He'll never call focus

again, the poor bastard.

The best scene and the

best special effects,

and we're missing it,

because he shot the camera.

You idiot, can't you tell a

wolf man from a Panavision?

He didn't even kill me.

What am I, poison?

If you'd only listened,

you stupid genius.

Now we have to go and catch him again.

I wanna go with you.

If there are any more risks to be taken,

if anybody else has to put

their life on the line,

we both have to make

sure that it's not me.

I can't believe it.

This is not exciting to me.

This is the story of Full Moon High.

Full Moon High is desperate

trouble, as you know.

Break that jinx!

Make that point!

Break that jinx.

One touchdown.

He's out there watching

and waiting in the dark.

An animal trying to remember

who he was when he was human.

Knowing that in some

strange way he belongs here.

Come back here, you

predatory son of a b*tch,

and play in the last play

of the greatest game of all.

That was beautiful,

Sergeant, that was beautiful.

I know, I worked on it all night.

He's out there watching

and waiting in the dark.

An animal trying to remember

who he was when he was human.

Knowing he belongs here somehow.

Come back, you huge

predatory son of a b*tch.

Come back and play your last play

in the greatest game of all.

What you just said.

That was beautiful.

Tony!

You get off the field, you're expelled!

Don't you put any holes in the bugger,

because I get the body.

Hey, that's school equipment.

You're gonna have to pay for that, punk!

Yeah, I think Shawn Kirby

took a bite of the the ball back in 1932.

Then again, that wasn't

the entire football.

I'm holding my fire!

Clear the field!

The vital question expands then.

Did he take a chomp out of that sucker

before he crossed the line?

That's the question here.

He's turned bad, honey.

He's a rotten wolf now.

No, no, under the hair and

teeth, he's still my Tony.

Well, I guess it's true.

Looks don't count in men

if they got personality.

Stop that firing!

It won't do any good!

I'm the only one that can stop him!

Tony, it's me, remember?

Remember all the things we

used to do in the woods,

or up on the floor in my room, huh?

On the floor?

She likes it on the floor?

Now, we're gonna walk

off this field unmolested.

Jane, this beast is

surer than sh*t turned bad.

I can't believe this.

I can't believe my eyes.

We'll adapt, Tony.

We're going home now, Tony.

Well, I don't wanna share my room!

Especially with a werewolf!

Jane, we can't bring him home!

We just got new drapes!

He'll ruin the broadloom.

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