Full Of It Page #6

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but I'm supposed to be in prague.

No, you-you can't leave, I-I need you guys.

Aww, Sam, I know it may seem...

like your world's coming to an end but it's not, OK?

It's just adolescence. This too shall pass.

No, Mom, it's about more than that.

Look, I told all these lies...

and-and now they've magically come true...

Mmm! - and-and I can't get out of it.

He gets his creativity from my side of the family.

No, I'm-I'm telling the truth.

I'm not Iying.

Da-Dad, I'm literally failing out of schooI.

I'm not getting the M.A.A. Scholarship.

Tommy Lee didn't go to college.

Education is overrated.

Go to the university of life!

Bam!

Gotta go. My cab's here.

Yeah, I'm late for my sound check.

Where's it-

Leonard family meeting!

Leonard family meeting!

Sam Leonard-here!

Jill Leonard!

Hank Leonard.

Sorry, son. My fans need me.

Ha ha! Whoo-hoo!

Dad, come back! Dad, please!

Dad!

Ungh!

. Lie lie lie lie lie.

. You lie lie lie lie lie.

. Tell me why, tell me why.

. Why d'you have to lie?.

. Should've realized that you should've told the truth.

. Should've realized you know what I'll do.

. You're in suspension.

. You're a liar.

. Now I wanna know, now, now, now I wanna know.

. Why you never look me in the face.

. Broke a confidence just to please your ego.

. Should've realized you know what I know.

. You're in suspension.

Oh, my God, my nuts! -. You're a liar.

. I know where you go, everybody you know.

. I know everything that you do or say.

. So when you tell lies I'll always be in your way.

. I'm nobody's fooI and I know all.

I loved your paper, SamueI. It read like a poem.

Thank you, Mrs. Moran.

Oh, it's not Mrs. Moran anymore.

Mr. Moran and I have separated.

And I need... a man.

. You're in suspension.

Oh, look, more children.

We'll just have to finish this tonight.

What? We will?

I'm chaperoning the Homecoming dance.

Don't be late.

I love you! I love you, SamueI! I love you!

. You're a southern man, you're a northern souI.

. You're a west-ender, you got an eastern souI.

. But you're no one at all.

. You're a rich man, you're a poor man.

. You're this man, then you're that man.

. But you're no one at all.

. You're a liar, you're a winner.

. An expert and a beginner.

. But you're no one at all.

. When the wind blows that's when you know.

. That your nose grows and your face shows.

. That you're no one at all.

. You're a hard rock with your own space.

. You're a disgrace but you've got your grace.

. But you're no one at all.

BDI, where the only thing colder than the ice cream...

is my attitude. This is Annie. How may I help ya?

Ooh, FYI...

I'm pregnant.

What?

Don't you want a family?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, someday, but-

Wait-It's not even possible, we never actually got to... you know.

So let's start right now, then.

So you're not- So you're not pregnant.

Oh, God, I hope he has your eyes.

Why did you-

Come on!

Oh, my God, you're insane. I gotta get out of here.

Come on! Come on. - Ah!

Haven't you always wanted to do it in a public toilet?

Are you horny?

Let's make love!

Come on, you're driving me crazy!

And when were you gonna tell me about all this, huh?

Mrs. Moran.

Hi.

No-no, wait. Mrs. Moran, wait!

Wait. Wait.

Come on, it's time for the big announcement.

And this year's Bridgeport Homecoming king and queen...

are...

Vicki Sanders and Sam Leonard!

. I don't remember what day it was.

. I didn't notice what time it was.

. AII I know is that I fell in love with you.

. And if all my dreams come true.

. I'll be spending time with you.

. Every day's a new day...

Just like to take this moment to congratulate our newly crowned...

Homecoming king and queen!

And...

to our king...

Whoo! Yeah!

SamueI Leonard...

I would just like to say...

that I am madly in love with you.

Which is why it hurt so much...

to find you trying to have sex with Vicki Sanders...

in the faculty restroom.

What?

Mrs. Moran, think about your career.

Oh, screw my career! What is my life without you, Sam?

probably pretty fine.

And to our-ha, mmm-

our...

filthy skank queen, Vicki Sanders...

I would just like to say to you...

Ah!

You ball-breaking whore!

Ah!

Are you sure there isn't something you need to be telling me?

Actually, there is something...

that I need to be telling you, Marcus.

Oh, no. Oh.

Mr. -I'm sorry, Mr. - pri-principaI Hayes.

. Sloop John B!.

. Sloop John B!.

. Sloop John B!.

Mrs. Moran!

. We come on the sloop John B.

. Grandfather and me.

. Around Nassau town we did roam.

Mrs. Moran! Mrs. Moran! -. Drinking all night.

. Got into a fight.

. Well, I feeI so broke up-.

Oh!

Guys! Mrs. Moran!

Guys! please, you don't understand.

Take him to the parking lot! - No! No! No! No! No! Guys!

. The constable had to come and take him away.

Oh, please. - What are you doing, Kyle?

Come on, man, this is crazy. What are you doing?

What does it look like I'm doing?

I'm gonna pull him behind my truck!

Kyle, this is crazy!

Kyle, look, look, we were just going to rough him up a little.

But you know what, I think you're taking these threats a little too literaI!

I'd like to second that.

Damn it! I've flooded it again!

Kyle, relax! Kyle!

No! Move!

Grrrr!

Let's make you look good tonight, Chapstick!

Oh, thank you, Lord!

Kyle!

You get to skip all the way to the car battery on your nuts!

What? Wh-Kyle, please, can we just talk about this, buddy?

Kyle, you don't wanna do this.

You're only doing this 'cause I lied...

and said you wanted to do it.

Are you saying I'm your puppet? - No, no, no, no!

Kyle, buddy, I'm just saying- I'm just saying-

You don't wanna do this!

Oh, yes I do!

. This is the worst trip I've ever been on.

Kyle! Kyle! Think about your life.

Grrr!

You're gonna wear out your battery.

Grrr!

Just go ahead and do it, my life can't get any worse.

Grrr!

Everybody freeze! You're all under arrest!

. Let me go home I really wanna go home.

Or-Or maybe it can.

. Oh! I feeI so broke up I wanna go home.

. I wanna go home.. I wanna go home.

Hey there, gangster.

There goes my guidance counselor of the year award.

Hey.

Listen, uh, I'm sorry about the advice I gave you the other day.

Although everything I said is basically true.

Everyone does lie.

But that doesn't make it right.

And more importantly, I don't think it's gonna make you happy.

In fact I think honesty and happiness go hand in hand.

Though try telling my psycho ex-wife that.

Anyway...

principaI Hayes has dropped all the charges...

and I've talked him into giving you detention...

for the rest of the year instead of expelling you.

Th-Thank you. If-

If you could only get me out of all these lies.

I believe it was Thomas Jefferson who once said...

"Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom. "

OK. Wow. - Thank you!

Did I say something usefuI?

I'm leaving you. - What?

Now, now, I realize you're like the most beautifuI girI ever...

and I'm, um, me...

but, uh... we have nothing in common.

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