Funny Face Page #2

I asked you to leave.

That is my right.

If the rights of the individual

are not respected by the group,

the group cannot exist.

What does that mean?

''Do unto others as

you would have others do unto you.''

We'll only do unto you for a moment,

and it's no more

than we would do unto ourselves.

Girls, I want these books rearranged.

They look too much alike.

They're too pat. Mix them up.

No, you mustn't mix them up.

The books on this shelf

pertain to empiricism,

and on this shelf, materialism,

and on this, psychopiscoparalysm.

Put them back. Please talk to her.

It'll take me hours.

One never talks to Maggie Prescott.

One only listens.

Here. I think we ought to use her

in the shot. Miss, come here, please.

- Me?

- You're selling a book to that girl.

Her?

Just pretend that Marion can read.

Say, listen!

Alright, Marion, let's go.

But this would be a violation

of all my principles.

It would be hypocrisy for me

to lend myself to this.

- I'm sorry, but...

- Shush.

Now, tell Marion about the books

so that we can get out of here.

This deals with epiphenomenalism,

which has to do with consciousness

as a mere accessory

of physiological processes

whose presence or absence

makes no difference...

Whatever are you doing?

Hold it!

- Good. Get her in another outfit.

- Put on the shebop.

None of you seems to realise you're

trespassing on private property.

You run around, ignorant of the fact

that I can have you put in jail.

- For the last time...

- You're getting tiresome.

What are you doing?

Let go. Let go of my arm.

I know you don't mean any harm,

but you are in everyone's way.

Now, we won't be a moment.

Let me in.

The air will do her good.

She was very pale.

Alright, hit it.

Hold it. Ready?

Good. One more, please.

Alright. Hit it.

Hold it. Ready?

Very good, Marion.

One more, please. Last one.

Alright, here we go.

Hit it.

Hold it. Ready.

OK, that's it. That ought to do.

(bell rings)

- Quite through?

- Thank you. You've been wonderful.

We'll mention the shop

in the magazine.

Don't you dare!

(Miss Prescott) Taxi!

(bell jingles)

Oh, no!

Oh!

Hello there.

I stayed to help you

put these back.

I didn't realise we made such a mess.

Which shelf for materialism?

Just hand them to me.

Oh, no.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

We don't usually barge in that way.

I mean a man of your ability

wasting his time

photographing silly dresses

on silly women.

Most people think they're

beautiful dresses on beautiful women.

At most, a synthetic beauty.

Trees are beautiful.

Why don't you photograph trees?

I do what I do for a living.

It has to do with supply and demand.

You'd be amazed how small

the demand is for pictures of trees.

My work is pleasant,

the pay is excellent,

and I get a trip to Paris every year.

I certainly envy you that.

I'd be in Paris now

if I could afford it.

You'd have a ball.

You'd go to a party every night,

drink champagne,

swim in perfume, and a new love

affair every hour on the hour.

If I went to Paris, it would be

to go to Emile Flostre's lectures.

Who goes to Paris for lectures?

Professor Flostre

is the greatest living philosopher,

and father of empathicalism.

Oh? What's empathicalism?

The most sensible approach to

true understanding and peace of mind.

Sounds great, but what is it?

It's based on empathy.

Do you know

what the word ''empathy'' means?

No, I'll have to have

the beginner's course on that one.

Empathy.

Is it something like sympathy?

Oh, it goes beyond sympathy.

Sympathy

is to understand what someone feels.

Empathy

is to project your imagination

so that you actually feel

what the other person is feeling.

You put yourself

in the other person's place.

Do I make myself clear?

- Why did you do that?

- Empathy.

I put myself in your place and

I felt that you wanted to be kissed.

You put yourself in the wrong place.

I have no desire to be kissed

by you, or anyone else.

Don't be silly. Everybody wants

to be kissed, even philosophers.

I'm sorry, Mr Avery, we don't stock

what you're looking for.

I'll let you out.

Don't bother. I'll throw myself out.

Goodbye.

(bell jingles / door shuts)

I was taught that

I ought not expose my inner senses

Had no plan for a man

I was full of self-defences

Now I feel that I really

should face the consequences

My philosophic search

Has left me in the lurch

I must find why my mind

is behaving like a dancer

What's the clue to pursue?

For I have to have the answer

I could cry salty tears

Where have I been all these years?

Is it fun?

Or should I run?

How long has this been going on?

There were chills up my spine

And some thrills I can't define

Does it show?

And who would know?

How long has this been going on?

Oh, I feel that I could melt

Into heaven I'm hurled

I know how Columbus felt

Finding another world

Can I trust how I feel?

Is this my Achilles heel?

Look at me, I'm all at sea

How long has this been going on?

This is grand

This is great

I'm in such a lovely state

Can one kiss

Do all of this?

(Miss Prescott) What do you think?

(Dovitch) Good models.

What have you in mind?

(Miss Prescott) A fantastic idea.

It staggers me

nobody's thought of it before.

I'm going to select a girl

to be the Quality Woman.

This girl will represent everything

the magazine stands for.

It's a great gimmick. Any

of these models would be alright.

She's got to be more than alright.

She's got to have pizzazz.

A collection will be designed for her

by the greatest couturier in Paris.

- Paul Duval?

- Yes, Paul Duval.

And he's going to let us photograph

the collection before the opening.

We'll scoop every other magazine.

- Staggers you, doesn't it?

- I can't believe it.

He would be barred

from all the other fashion magazines.

Nonsense. If the project comes off,

we'll all be heroes.

Wait till you see what I've got.

The girl. The Quality Woman.

Oh, Marion's...

Forget her. This is the other girl

I'm talking about.

That thing from the book shop?

Maggie, she's new.

She's fresh.

You've gone out of your mind.

One can't deny that she is unusual.

Who is she?

Don't even ask. The thought of her

makes me shudder. Dreadful girl.

If this is some sort of joke...

It's no joke. If we do her over

and fix her up, she'd be great.

She'd devour us all.

- Come on, Maggie.

- Well, look at her.

I think her face is perfectly funny.

The Quality Woman must have grace,

elegance and pizzazz.

This is the first time

I've seen you lack imagination.

Every girl in Quality

has grace, elegance and pizzazz.

What about a girl with character,

spirit and intelligence?

That would be novel

in a fashion magazine.

Sir, I owe you a drink.

Can you make me some enlargements?

- Yes.

- Use our darkroom.

- Let me study the possibilities.

- Now you are talking.

- I'm not promising anything.

- You don't have to.

Runs around here

like he owns the magazine.

Lettie, remember that creature

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