Furlough Page #3

---

- Thank you so much.

She's prairie dogging.

They call it, they call it a

turtle head where I come from.

[cell phone beeps]

[beeps]

- I got it.

- Okay.

Thank you.

Ah! What a relief.

Hey, soldier boy.

Seen any action lately?

Well, I'm always

lookin' for action.

But, honey, like you look

tied up right now.

- I'm free in six months.

- Six months? It's a date.

[laughing]

You see that?

I still got it. Yeah!

- Uh-huh!

- Six months!

[horn honks]

- Thank you so much.

- Goodbye.

- Good riddance.

- Thank you so so much.

And I hope one day,

when you find yourself

in trouble, you find

someone to be as kind

to you

as you've been to me.

- Okay.

- Anderson!

Now, give my best

to your mother.

[chuckles]

Alright.

Ah, I'm ready.

Feels good to be out

in the street, you know.

Well, the train is coming

in ten minutes.

Don't get used to it.

[indistinct chatter on PA]

There's track trouble

so your train's gonna be

delayed two hours.

Okay, thank you.

That's too bad.

Listen, anything happens

to either one of us

I'll meet you

right back here.

Funny.

No, really.

Are you hungry?

We got some time.

Yeah, I haven't eaten

since yesterday.

I know a place nearby.

Alright..

Oh, goddammit,

these hurt.

- What?

- Ow!

Please, I need you

to stay closer, okay.

I'm right here,

I'm right here..

Wait, give me

a minute. Please.

Give me a minute.

I just think that we're...

I don't know.

[grunting]

You goddamn bastard,

try that again!

What happened?

Tried to run off

with my lady's bag.

- Oh!

- It's alright.

- Thank you.

- Don't you worry.

Alright,

just stay close, okay?

Train station's

right down here, darlin'.

It's a good thing

I'm here. Ow!

- You okay?

- Yeah.

No, I'm good.

It's just..

Ow! Goddammit. Ah!

- I must've caught some skin under that.

- Alright.

- Come on.

- Really?

Yeah. But you better not

make me regret this, okay?

I'm not gonna make

you regret anything.

We're gonna have

a great time.

You got that one?

Oh, fantastic.

Thank you so much!

Alright, okay, okay.

No, no, I... I'll be good,

I promise. I promise.

- It was a high kick.

- That's all I got.

[instrumental music]

Come to momma.

Thank you!

[laughs]

So, Stevens,

what do you think?

Ah?

It's kinda messy,

Anderson.

Oh, thank you.

You can call me Joan.

Huh.

But how's it taste?

- Not bad, Anderson.

- Can't do it, can you?

I'd rather not.

Oh, my God.

Oh.

It's dripping down

my sleeves here.

Would you just maybe,

help me loosen one.

I got six months.

I'm not going anywhere.

- Yeah.

- Alrighty.

So sweet, thank you.

Oh, fantastic.

That's great.

- There we are.

- That's great.

Yeah, alright.

- Come on, give me the other one.

- Really?

- Yeah.

- Oh, my gosh.

You're too good to me.

I know you're not

going anywhere.

- I get to see my mom, right?

- Uh-huh.

Mm-hmm.

Alright hold on.

Here.

They're going

right back on, okay?

Absolutely!

Now, I can eat

like a lady.

[instrumental music]

[chuckling]

Jesus!

My mom's gonna freak

when she sees this crap.

Oh, no, you look good.

Yeah, well.

You don't know my mother.

She's the reason

I ended up like this.

[cell phone ringing]

Sorry-ass, loser inmate.

On my way to see her on

her deathbed with my CO.

You think this is the way I

wanted my life to turn out?

No. Probably not.

But you can't really

blame your mom, can you?

Oh, yes, I can,

she's a ballbuster.

[cell phone ringing]

[laughing]

You know what

I'm talking about.

Hi, mom.

I'm working now, okay?

I can't talk.

I will call you later.

My mother was so out of it

she had me stuck

in a loony bin.

But you were

a drug addict, no?

Yeah, that's probably what

made a drug addict out of me.

You know my mom actually used

to work in a mental hospital.

I know those places

can be rough

but I'm sure she thought she was

doing it for your own good.

[cell phone ringing]

It's over now, you know?

You learn a lot

about dysfunction

co-dependency... you know.

You gotta, you gotta

stand up for yourself.

It's..

- It's important.

- Yeah.

Give me a minute.

Moms, I am working.

What do you want?

- Your sister is out of her mind.

- Ma..

She won't help me,

I can't find anything

I don't know

where anything is

and she's just,

she's workin' me!

Pull yourself together,

okay?

I need you to lay down,

and calm down, alright?

Goddammit, I will be

home when I am home.

Wh..

Ma, what'd she say?

She said give her regards

to the sweetest

and best sister

she's ever had.

Sure.

You gotta eat.

Nicely executed, officer.

Here's to.

- Yeah.

- Feels good, right?

[chuckling]

Yeah.

Yeah.

[chuckling]

This is not

the last impression

I want my mother

to have of me.

Alrighty, come on.

No, you don't tell me

when to go

I tell you when to go,

and we got plenty of time

we don't have to go.

- Oh, we do?

- Yeah.

Uh, hey, what do you say

we go get a super-quick

shampoo and blowout, huh?

[chuckles]

No, we don't have

that much time.

Yeah, but it's just

around the corner.

Twelve bucks,

can't beat that.

It's a hairdressing school

and I used to go there

all the time

before I got locked up.

Fine, but it's not

on the schedule, so, no.

Well, the train's not

on schedule either, man.

We got time,

let's go do it.

This is gonna

kill my mother.

Please.

Anderson,

the answer is no.

[speaking in foreign language]

You're makin' me

nervous back there

you wanna cop a squat?

Only because my feet hurt.

[speaking in foreign language]

[Anderson laughing]

You married? Officer?

I'd rather not say,

thank you.

Oh, you are so not,

I can tell.

You got a boyfriend?

Not now.

Come on.

Why not, look at you.

I am.. I'm busy.

I work a lot,

I take care of my mom

I don't really have

a lot of time to go out

and meet people.

Too busy for nookie?

[sighs]

Yeah.

I can't believe you still

live with your mother.

Unbelievable.

[chuckles]

Yeah, well, she raised me

and my sister on her own.

And, uh, we're

all she has left. So..

So, your sister

helps out, huh?

I wouldn't exactly

put it like that.

She, uh,

she helps herself out.

You know, one thing

I learned in this world?

You gotta help yourself

'cause no one else will.

I think the problem

is too many people

think like that.

[hair dryer whirring]

You have gorgeous hair!

Well, you girls

did a fantastic job.

Do I have time

to go to the bathroom?

Where's your bathroom?

- Over there.

- Alright.

Save us some bother

a bit later, right?

Yeah, yeah.

Just save you

the trouble later..

Yeah, that's all

I'm talking about.

I mean, you know

what happens when you..

- Ah!

- Oh, I'm sorry. Sorry.

- Me first.

- Mm-hmm, of course.

Alright.

- Make it quick.

- Thank you so much.

Mm-hmm.

Hm.

Yeah, yeah. I'm comin'.

Just a minute.

I gotta finish

my business.

Oh, baby, real make-up.

[indistinct chatter]

[toilet flushing]

Here I come, here I come.

Alrighty. Ready to go?

Someone got a new face.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes