Gendarme et les extra-terrestres, Le (The Gendarme and the Creatures from Outer Space) Page #2

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And I was so proud of that brigade.

It's the end of an era.

Attention.

At ease.

I can keep it short, gentlemen.

The stories about UFO's are spreading

dangerously fast through our ranks.

It's really becoming a

collective hallucination.

The statements about so-called

aliens...

...are made up and

aren't based on anything.

But I touched them.

- Shut up.

Don't make fools of us.

If you see or hear anything else,

come to me.

Dismissed.

But the country's in danger.

- Silent. Not to a colonel.

I'll walk with you, colonel.

That's one. That's them.

No, not the colonel.

Come. My wife will make some tea.

You're going against the rules,

and you know it.

Stop him. Stop him.

Bastards...

Colonel, I apologise for him,

for her, for me. My apologies.

He's lost it. He's hallucinating.

Don't be fooled. He's one of them.

We have to undress him.

Lock him in his room.

Come along, colonel.

Relax. I'll grab a chair.

Quickly, a chair.

What was wrong with that man?

What did I do?

It's incomprehensible.

It's unforgivable. He must have

been in the sun without his kepi.

He got hit with a hammer.

- Yes, Gerber, but...

Remember Champagne in '17.

Rebellion has to be crushed.

Some orange blossom will do you well.

That's a strong cup.

I'll see what we can do

about the whole matter.

You're not in too much pain?

- No, it's nothing.

Sergeant, Cruchot escaped.

Follow me.

My son...

Careful, your uniform doesn't

make you invulnerable.

Drive, Mother Superior, drive.

Did you see sergeant Cruchot?

- No, I didn't see a thing.

But those were your colleagues.

- I'm on a secret mission. Drive.

Whatever you say, my son.

The fate of humanity depends

on it. I'm on my own.

No, my son, God protects

those who support him.

The sergeant.

Didn't you see sergeant Cruchot?

Did anything happen?

- No, but he needs his rest.

I wanted to warn you,

in case you see him.

We help and support

the needy and the helpless.

So don't count on us

to help you.

As you wish, sister. Goodbye.

Sister...

Did you... Wait.

Let me help you. That's too heavy.

Give it to me.

Did you find him?

Keep looking then.

What is it? Are you ill?

Where did you want to go?

Are you in pain?

Are you ok?

Who did that?

- They hit me...

Who? Mother Superior?

Mother Superior...

A strong woman, you know.

Keep looking.

Where is it?

- I don't know.

The laundry's hanging there.

Monsignor...

Everything ok in your community?

- Perfect, Monsignor.

We laid out a new garden.

You should see it.

Mother Superior...

Look what I found in the washhouse.

That's sergeant Gerber.

He leads our gendarmes.

Are you still here? Who asked you to

do that? Sister?

No, not me.

- I offered myself.

That's very kind, but this is

not a mixed community.

Is this yours?

Monsignor, Mother Superior...

People praise your choir.

I'd like to use it for the procession.

Can I hear it?

- Of course. I'll call the sisters.

That was beautiful. Very good.

But who's the sister who sang

slightly off key?

Who is it?

- Sister Cruchotte from Newfoundland.

She got a cold trying to

convert the Eskimos.

That must have been a very

special mission, sister.

What did those strangers

think of God's word?

She lost her voice, sergeant...

monsignor.

How did they receive God's word...

Hold the thief. Hold the thief.

What is it, my son?

Someone stole a can of oil

from my gas station.

Oil? Where is he?

He hid in the chapel.

- Let's have a look then.

In the name of the Father, the Son

and the Holy Spirit.

May the mercy of Jesus Christ,

the love of God the Father...

...and the unity of the Holy Spirit

forever be with you.

And with your spirit.

I confess to Almighty God,

Creator of heaven and earth...

...for Jesus Christ,

his only Son...

...to the blessed Virgin Mary...

...to John the Baptist,

to archangel Michael...

...and the apostles Peter and Paul...

...to all the saints

and all my brothers...

...that I have sinned, in thought,

word and deed...

...through my fault, through my fault

through my most grievous fault.

I wanted to return it.

I'm not a thief.

My can.

Through my fault, through my fault.

I absolutely must have one.

- Take this one.

Sergeant...

Now he's even dressed like a nun.

You don't even stop at sacrilege.

The Lord punished him.

- Put him in the car.

As a nun...

That's going to be court-martial.

Thanks again. Without you, we

would have had to walk.

Licence number can't be read, light

broken and blinker not working.

Details, you might say,

but still.

Nothing serious. Twice you didn't give

right of way and you sped once.

I absolutely must have one.

Taupin...

You kiss so well. I never met

anybody like you.

Taupin. Come and explain this at

the police station. Come on.

Careful, you.

Where can he be?

We have to find him today, or

I'll have to inform my superiors.

Beaupied, we do the city.

The rest to the beach.

My son...

Mother Superior...

Enjoying the sun?

- I'm integrating.

Like the worker priests.

How's the investigation going?

They're dressing like gendarmes now

and harassing the girls.

Who, my son?

- That's a long story. Goodbye.

Now I've got them.

I need to have one.

Don't go anywhere.

Get up. We have to get them.

Come on.

With the languid lamps

clear and colourless

...on deep cushions impregnated

with odour...

With a charm as powerful as an evil angel

To trouble and calm where my soul had retreated.

With an audacity and wild innocence

that gave a strange pang to each metamorphosis.

Her arms overcome, thrown

like vain spears...

...showing how fragile she

was and how beautiful..

What have they done to them?

Come in.

Am I not disturbing, Mr Gerber?

Mrs Cruchot, come in.

Back from holiday already?

- I don't hear from Ludovic.

You did well to come back.

He keeps seeing UFOs and aliens.

He attacked the colonel

and dressed up like a nun.

But that's terrible.

Where is he?

On the run. He was last seen

on the beach of Pampelonne.

Excuse me.

My kisses are as light as these ephemera that fondle

The large translucent lake in the evening air.

I feel heavy terrors melt over me

And scattered black phantoms collide.

Separated from the world by our closed drapes,

We become indifferent to it, and that brings rest.

She sought, with eyes troubled by the storm,

And her simple sky already far away.

Excuse me,

I thought you were my wife.

Hello, miss.

So that's why you didn't come.

I'm filing for a divorce.

But no, darling,

I can explain.

You'll pay for this.

Just wait.

- That's not your wife. She's fake.

Taste this and you'll see.

that gendarme keeps following us

it's becoming a pain

do something about it

Good that you're here.

I can explain it all.

That woman...

- She's from another planet, yes.

Stop with those wild stories.

Nobody believes me, but it's true.

They really exist.

Poor Ludovic, you need affection.

You need a break.

As you wish, darling, but never

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