Get Santa Page #4

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Then Mum was right about you.

What do you mean? Why?

What did Mum say about me?

That you'd build me up with promises

and then let me down.

That's a very nasty thing to say,

and it's not true.

Well, no, actually, it is true.

I am immensely unreliable

and I always let people down,

which is precisely the reason

why Santa would never choose me

for this so-called mission.

Yeah? Well, he did.

So he must have had a good reason.

All I wanted today

was a chance to be a proper dad.

Do you have any idea how long

I've been waiting to see you?

Two years, one month and three days.

That's right.

Santa's relying on you, Dad.

Hello.

Hello, Miss Mawbury,

it's Steve Anderson here.

Oh, Steve.

To what do I owe this misfortune?

Um...

I was just wondering

if it would be possible

to cancel...

Postpone our meeting until next week.

You see, something quite important

has just come up with my son.

My dear boy, if you don't

come and visit me today at 5:00,

then you'll be having

Christmas dinner behind bars.

- Comprende?

- Yeah, yeah, absolutely clear.

Well, thank you, thanks very much

for being so understanding.

All right. Bye-bye. Bye.

Did you hear what I said?

Let's go save Christmas.

# Jingle bell,

jingle bell, jingle bell rock

# Jingle bells swing

and jingle bells ring

# Snowing and blowing up

bushels of fun

# Now the jingle hop has begun

# Jingle bell,

jingle bell, jingle bell rock

# Jingle bells chime

in jingle bell time

# Dancing and prancing

in Jingle Bell Square

#In the frosty air

# What a bright time

# It's the right time

#To rock the night away

# Jingle bell time is a swell time

# To go gliding in a one-horse sleigh

# Giddy-up, jingle horse,

pick up your feet

# Jingle around the clock

# Mix and a-mingle in the jingling feet

#That's the jingle bell rock

# Jingle bell,

jingle bell, jingle bell rock...

This is amazing.

Il... in Jingle Bell time

# Dancing and prancing

in Jingle Bell Square

#In the frosty air

# What a bright time

# It's the right time

#To rock the night away

# Jingle bell time is a swell time

# To go gliding in a one-horse sleigh

# Giddy-up, jingle horse,

pick up your feet... #

We are yet to ascertain

whether the stolen deer

was one of those from

the Tower Bridge

or one of the royal deer

living in the adjacent field.

You mean he could have stolen

the Queen's deer?

That's right, sir.

So we have an of fence

against the realm.

Er... No, sir. That's...

That's killing swans.

Hello, Ruth. Do come in.

- Have you bought me a gift?

- No.

That's my toad.

He spends Christmas with me.

Steve Anderson, on the other hand,

is going back to prison.

It would seem you do

have a gift for me after all.

The name of our suspect.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

- This is not good.

- What is it, Dad?

No, it's all right. Don't worry.

Just stay there.

Will it be all right, Dad?

Look, the police are here.

Let me deal with it.

Don't say anything. And will

you close those curtains, please?

Hello, Officer.

- Looks like your head gasket's blown.

- Yeah.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- All right, little man?

- We'll be fine, thank you.

- You got cover?

No, but a friend has got a breakdown

vehicle, so I'll just call him.

OK, well, my advice would be

to sit up on the bank.

- Don't want anyone crashing into you.

- No, we don't. Thank you, sir.

- Right.

- All right, you have a good

day.

So what have you got in there?

A... A dog.

Yeah? What kind of dog?

A... A very big one.

That's a funny-looking dog.

Oh, God! Oh, no!

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!

Bad deer. Bad deer.

- Is he dead?

- No, he is not dead.

Don't even say that.

But he is gonna wake up in 10 minutes

with a very sore head.

What are we gonna do?

It'll be fine, Dad. He'll understand.

No, he won't.

It "Bah, humbug!" No, that's too strong

#Cos it is my favourite holiday

# But all this year's been a busy blur

# Don't think I have the energy

# To add to my already mad rush

# Just cos it's "'tis the season"

#The perfect gift for me would be

# Completions and connections

left from

# Last year, ski shop

#Encounter, most interesting

# Had his number but never the time

#Most of '81 passed along those lines

#So deck those halls, trim those trees

# Raise up cups of Christmas cheer

#I just need to catch my breath

# Christmas by myself this year #

Go on, get in, quick.

One sec.

It's all right.

We're not the first people to try that.

Actually, we probably are.

- You've done well, pops.

- We did well.

We couldn't have done it

without you, though.

It's teamwork, that's all.

Imagine what you men

could achieve on the outside

if you all pulled together.

- Yeah.

- We talk about nothing else.

- Who are you?

- I am what you see.

Well, you've certainly got

the routine down if nothing else.

I've got a mate of mine that can get hold

of some moody Christmas trees.

With you dressed like that,

we can knock 'em out

for a bull's-eye a piece.

Your name's Roger Shaw.

You grew up in Bethnal Green.

When you were nine,

you wrote to me and asked for a bike.

I brought you one. It was silver.

Two days later, your father sold it

to make ends meet.

Your name is Sam Peters.

You were born in Torquay, Devon.

When you were six, you wrote to me

and asked for a painting set.

I brought you one

and you used it every day.

Until your friends told you it was girly

and you threw it in the bin.

Your name is Marlon Baxter.

When you were seven,

your mother left you

and your father and you wrote to me

asking for her to come home.

Well, that's not the sort of wish

I can grant.

But she's alive

and living in Leeds in Yorkshire,

and not a single day goes by

when she doesn't regret what she did.

Should I carry on?

No.

I'm Santa, Father Christmas,

call me what you want.

With the help of two friends,

I intend to escape from here tonight

so that I can deliver presents

to all the children in the world.

Wait. What friends?

Steve Anderson. You may know him.

And his son Tom.

You put the fate of Christmas

in the hands of that monkey?

Steve is very reliable.

Steve Anderson is a lot of things,

but reliable is not one of 'em.

You stick with me, pops. I'll get you out.

On...

Hello, hello, hello!

Come and get your tickets

to our fabulous production

of Cinderella!

Come and see me get my man.

And here he is, his most excellent

radiancy, his royal Prince Charming.

- Isn't that the van from earlier?

- Well, possibly.

But you either wanna pick up

a reindeer or you don't, and, besides,

he could be anywhere now.

No. Hello, Alison.

Hello, Steve. How are things?

Yeah, good, thank you, yeah.

We're having a lovely day.

- How are you?

- I'm having a cup of tea with the police.

- Oh, that's not good, is it?

- Let me speak with Tom.

All right.

- It's your mum.

- Hey, Mum.

Where are you, sweetie?

Just saving Christmas with Dad.

Sweetheart,

we've been really worried about you.

- Your dad is in heaps of trouble.

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