Ghostbusters Page #4

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But still so many more checks to go.

You have been bullied your entire life.

Now you will be the bully.

Trust in your abilities,

and the universe shall bend before your will.

Hey, weirdo.

We got a clogged toilet in 1843. It's bad.

I mean, like, biblically bad. Get on it.

Absolutely.

Nothing would make me happier.

Whatever, freak show. Just do it.

And the universe shall bend before your will.

Charge the lines.

Create the vortex.

Break the barrier.

I found a fantastic spot for your business.

It's more of a research lab.

- What do you think?

- That's it?

Let's go see your new home.

- Oh, my God! Look at...

- Look at it!

- Look at how high!

- Look at the amazing spread!

Look at the ceiling to the floor height!

On.

Look at this. Look at it.

It's perfect.

- We got tons of space.

- Stripper pole!

- Uh, we'll take it.

- Great.

- The rent is $21,000 a month.

- F*** you.

- Excuse me?

- I'm sorry. That's the rent?

- Yeah.

- Who can afford that?

All your friend said was that

you were looking for a place

to explore the unknown.

Okay, we need to explore

something a lot cheaper.

There's an upstairs!

Are you offended by the smell

of Chinese food?

I have now moved above you,

and you still can't help me out.

How does it take you an hour

to go up one flight of stairs?

I have really bad knees.

You know what?

What is that?

It's our hot and sour shrimp soup.

That looks like dishwater and one shrimp,

and I think it's...

I hope that's a water chestnut.

When it feels like

The world is on your shoulders

And all of the madness

Has got you going Crazy

Oh, we're dancing? Okay.

Let's be safe, though.

Where all of the action

ls right there at your feet, well

Holtz. Holtz. Holtzmann!

Fire!

Over towards the fire.

Thank you.

You'll be doing fine once the music starts

I hate to DeBarge in.

- She loves that.

- Is that by DeBarge?

I thought it was Devo.

- Anyway, I got the website up.

- Oh.

I passed out a bunch of these fliers

all over town,

so I'm drumming us up a little business.

"f you see something, say something."

It's catchy.

It's good.

- Yeah, I'll take it.

- I think it might be the anti-terrorism slogan.

Oh, God.

- It is, isn't it?

- It is. I'm sorry.

Well, I guess now we know

why so many people are calling

about suspicious-looking bags.

Dang it.

I love the green paper!

Thank you.

Hey. Uh, I'm here about the receptionist job.

- Hi. Hi.

- Hi.

Is this a big ol' robot?

What?

The receptionist job that was in the paper.

Um, that's what I was here about.

You're hired.

Okay, I... God, you're all sweaty.

I think I got it.

"If there's something strange in the..."

Ow.

Oh!

Kevin. Right?

- Kevin.

- Yeah.

Abby. We spoke on the phone.

- We did. Yeah.

- Hello there.

- Okay.

- Kevin. Oh.

That's a manly name.

My name's Erin. With an

For "everything you want."

- Okay. Well, we should probably...

- Hmm.

Should probably get started.

Erin? Do you want to join us?

- Yes.

- Erin.

I've got some questions.

Okay. Here we go.

Let me just get to my notes.

Um... Okay.

All right, first off, I just want to say...

You know, we should probably

start with a very important question

that we're asking all of the applicants.

Urn, you know,

are you seeing anyone right now?

- Um, seeing anyone?

- Yeah.

- Just for business purposes.

- Business purposes only.

Well, I'm seeing all three of you.

In front of me.

Oh, just forget she even asked,

because if she did, that would be illegal, so...

Forgotten.

Good.

No, I've forgotten.

I don't know what you asked.

There we go.

Uh, Jillian Holtzmann, Radio Times.

Uh, what have you been doing

with your whole life?

Great question.

Oh, well, um, lots of different jobs.

Um, I did the "actor thing."

- Worked for...

- I'm just gonna... Just real quick.

Can I ask why no glass?

Oh, uh, yeah. They just kept getting dirty,

so I took them out.

- That's...

- Don't have to clean them anymore.

- Oh, boy.

- And I can just...

- I got to try to keep that in mind.

- Yeah.

Would it be okay if I bring Mike Hat

to work sometimes?

He has major anxiety problems.

You know what? I would love

to let your cat live here with you,

but I have a pretty severe cat allergy.

No, I don't have a cat.

He's a dog. His name is Mike Hat.

Your dog's name is My Cat?

No, Mike Hat.

Your dog's name is Mike, last name Hat?

Well, his full name is Michael Hat.

I can't say that I'm allergic to dogs, so...

It's all right. He lives with my mum.

- Well, then we have that figured out.

- Okay. That was...

One down. No cat.

But you know what I say,

let's jump ahead, uh...

Kevin dabbles in web design.

And I asked him to throw together

- ...maybe a couple of logos for us.

- Uh-huh.

- You want to see them?

- Now is your moment.

- Pull it out.

- Oh.

Sure.

You're like a lawsuit waiting to happen.

Here we go.

Okay, so...

What do you think of that?

Oh.

Yeah, you do see how this

might make us look bad, right?

Uh, is it the b*obs you don't like?

'Cause I can make them bigger.

No, I can see them.

Ghost Tits was my nickname

in middle school.

Oh, right?

You know what? I think

it's not always about the end result.

It's about the journey.

Well, uh, what about this one?

- Oh, uh...

- Uh...

I think that's already a thing.

What, 7-1-1?

It's 7-Eleven.

Yep, it is. I have another option, though.

- Okay, please.

- It's this one.

That's one of my favorites.

Uh... I think you might've made a mistake.

I don't think that one's for us.

Oh, no. No, that's for you.

You know, I just thought the floating hot dog

implies that a ghost is holding it.

Your work is

more cerebral than I expected.

Still, so many questions about that choice.

First one is, why a hot dog?

Oh, I just like them.

Both food groups, all in one.

Dogs and buns.

- Those are great.

- Yeah.

We're actually gonna

discuss everything just for a second,

so if you could just stand over there,

- ...we just need to convene for a moment.

- Okay.

- Sure. All right.

- Thank you.

Just go right over there.

Don't listen.

I won't.

Oh. He covered his eyes.

Guys, look, as much as

I would like to have him here to look at...

- Um...

- What?

You don't find him attractive?

Kevin?

Ow!

God, no. Poor guy.

Ow!

- I don't know, guys. I don't know.

- Come on, Erin.

We need help around here.

We cannot keep carrying

that equipment up here.

And I know the phones aren't ringing

off the hook right now, but they will be.

You know,

an aquarium is a submarine for fish.

Listen, let's just see

how the rest of the day goes.

You know, talk to other people, and we will

hire who is most qualified, okay? Deal?

There are no other people.

He's the only applicant.

Excellent.

God, that's loud, huh?

- It's loud.

- It's loud.

- Kevin. You got the job.

- Hmm?

- Welcome aboard.

- Cool.

Can I bring my suitcases up?

Yep, you sure can.

Look at him.

Ow!

Oh, uh, ma'am?

Hi, ma'am. If you're waiting for takeout,

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