Gigantic

They stopped.

- Which one?

- 7.

Start the stopwatch.

- Is he okay?

- Yes, fine.

Stop.

What does that mean?

Nothing ...

... there

Well, the logic is, when forced into an aversive situation

i.e. being dumped into a pool

the rat will oscillate between attempts to escape

and resigning to its fate.

and resigning to its fate.

- And this guy gave up

- Today he did.

- Does he usually?

- Yeah.

I'm trying to quantify

how helpless this one feels

and why more today than yesterday.

But it seems Mr. 7 is always

a little bit of a quitter.

- Umm, could you sign this for me, Larry?

- Sure

- Thank you.

- This is my friend Brian Weathersby

- Hi

- Hi Brian, nice to meet you.

- Do you work here?

- No

We went to college together.

- Really? He looks so much older than you.

- Thanks so much.

This is a PhD candidate in neurobiology

She's studying aggression and sexual behaviour e

in Mongolian gerbils.

- Yeah, I just play with gerbil dick all day.

Really?

No, uh ... just their brains.

I'm sorry, that was really weird.

- Little bit.

Uhm, I'm gonna go. It was nice to meet you.

I'm sorry again.

She had any idea how many times a day I masturbated

thinking about her

... she'd probably sue the university.

- And she'd be right, it's inappropriate.

- Yeah.

So ... why do some swim

and others not?

Oh, it's hard to say ...

I mean nobody knows

To what degree the rat feels helpless

What we do know is the drugs we administer to make the rats

Wanna swim more are the same drugs that make people,

feel less depressed.

- Antidepressants?

- Yup, antidepressants.

Do you know women are 20 times more likely

to be depressed than men?

Maybe more. Can't remember the exact number.

It's a lot more.

That's good ... for men.

Not really ... when you think about it heterosexually.

Right.

Enough, enough, enough ... stop stop stop!

Oh sh*t, what happened to you?

Pickup game,

caught an elbow.

Black dude?

White dude?

Definitely white.

Hey Kevin, lunch.

Hey look, got some mini burgers

a whole bunch if you want some.

Wassup dude not much.

- Hey Kevin

- Want some?

- No, I'm good.

How did you make out with the

Wall Street guy?

Uhh, I think I sold him 5 beds.

Why does he need 5 beds for?

He's got 5 bedrooms.

Smart.

Came in looking for some beds

for his new mansion

I asked him how his bonus season went.

- Yeah, and ...?

He cackled, squealed like a pig.

F***ing guy's 28.

What's bonus season?

Every year banks give out bonuses, y'know, big bonuses

a couple of mil.

I'm in the wrong industry.

Anyway, I got him up on that Scona

Made him take off his shoes, got him a cup of tea

He laid there for a couple of minutes .. I asked him

some questions about his job, reported bout his success

And bang ... 5 beds.

You could sell salt to a slug ...

... if you listen to the slug.

Ugh, this place depresses me. Don't like the idea.

- Stores?

Let me get you somebody to talk to.

- Oh Christ.

They will help, they know what they're talkin about.

- Ok, but i don't have all day for speeches

I want a f***ing bed.

Hold on.

Hi, can I help you?

- Uh yes, my boss is looking for a bed.

Okay ...

- And he doesn't have a ton of time.

This bed feels like it's full of cookie dough.

That's a horsehair-covered bed.

- It's a sh*t-covered bed that's what it is.

What's this?

- That's the Lady Englander Americanus Series 400

A salesman with a shiner.

I'm gonna believe him.

Better ...

feels like a plank though.

Uh here's some literature.

- I didn't just fall off the turnip truck, son.

Ok, uh tell you what,

if you have any specific questions

I'm happy to help

I'll be right over here.

No no no, you're on this ride with me

the poofter here

And I came here to buy a bed and I don't have time

to chase you down

your little videogame station.

And what you kids do all day.

Playing those tetris games pretending to work.

What's this?

A sarcophagus?

Um, that's the Scona Sangar 770 series

Best bed on the market.

Swedish.

That was a joke.

Yup, good one.

Try it out, Gary.

C'mon, not gonna touch you.

Don't have to be shy in front of me,

I know how you spend your weekends

Bunch of homos out there on Fire Island piling on top of each other. It's disgusting.

- It's nice.

Yeah. Bet you wish you had a couple of these out there

Get all your buddies together.

Have a disgusting orgy.

I bet you wish you could come.

Alright, get up.

Alright, what's the story on this thing?

Uh, it's the last bed you'll ever buy.

Only bed I ever bought, how much?

- $14,000

American? It's a lot of money

for a goddamn bed.

Alright, I'll send my girl by this afternoon

take a look

Work out the financing.

not a penny more

So don't try to Jew the price up on me.

You're not Jewish, are you?

No, I'm not.

- Good.

It's just a figure of speech,

I'm half Jew myself

I work with Jews, they Jew me all day long

so I can say it.

Ok, um there's shipping and handling

No. 14 grand, work it out Chester.

Let's go Gary, this place depresses me.

You going where and for what now?

And when you leaving?

Vancouver, right? - Vermont

That was close.

My father's 80th birthday.

- 80th? Damn.

Your brother's going?

- Yup.

Hi.

Hi.

Can i help you?

Yeah, um, my dad ...

he came in here earlier

And talked to someone about a bed

Ok.

He came in ...

he came in here with another guy.

Um, big guy?

- No, gay.

I meant your dad?

Oh yeah, kind of sort of uh loud mouth

Yeah, the uh Scona bed you wanna see?

Yeah ...

Uh ... this way.

That's a great bed.

Made in Sweden.

Wow.

May I sit on it?

Sure.

Ohh, this is a nice bed!

How much is it?

- $14,000

Holy sh*t!

Is this the one he wants?

- Mm hmm.

F*** it, money gotta spin man.

Thank you.

Can I lie here for awhile?

Sure.

Thanks.

Can you see up my skirt?

Not really.

Great.

What happened to your eye?

Uhh, I was attacked by a homeless man.

I'm gonna get you a receipt

there's a warranty package

Built into the price, it's a pretty standard

And for delivery

I guess I'll waive the fee

Because I told your dad ...

Or really he told me ... umm ..

Family Initiative

Kenyatta Folds, please.

I'm sorry, can you repeat the name?

Yes, can you please connect me to Kenyatta Folds

This is Brian Weathersby.

This is Kenyatta

- Hey Kenyatta, it's Brian

Oh hey, wassup man?

What's the name of those beds you make?

Ah well, we don't make them

but they're called Scona beds.

I looked them up,

that sh*t's expensive.

Yes, but truly excellent

sleeping devices.

Better be for that kinda money.

Wassup big boy?

Nothing, it's Friday, so uh,

I thought I'd call.

I got no news man,

they met on Wednesday ...

But nothing's changed.

What about the application and references

did that make it any further?

No.

Ok, I'm still interested in the

main adoption list

But can you keep me on the email list

and for alternative list as well?

All 3 lists?

- You know it, man.

Thanks.

Be safe.

Will do, bye.

Hey Brian,

who is that girl?

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