GirlHouse Page #3

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Yeah.

And this is the first time we've

actually really hung out.

That is weird.

Who else do you

keep in touch with from home?

Oh, just my close friends.

You know, my homies.

Um...

What about you?

No one, really.

It's weird, you know,

sometimes it feels like

you have so many friends one

minute, and then you leave home

and you're basically all alone.

It's hard to picture you

as not popular.

- I mean, I have friends...

- And now you have me.

I do, do I?

Mm-hmm.

- Uh, well, this is me, so...

- Very nice.

Hey, uh, you know there's this

matinee on Saturday

of Rear Window,

it's playing at that

old theatre by the river...

Do you have a chemistry lab

on Saturday, too?

Oh... Yeah, no, no, no. Um...

But Hitchcock is definitely

worth the 70-mile drive.

Yeah, I'll see you Saturday.

See you Saturday.

Good night.

It's Kylie.

I need a pick-up. Thanks.

How's that exam prep going?

You know, I think you might be

the only straight person I know

to turn it off

when the nudity starts.

Which does beg the interesting

question of, you are straight,

- aren't you? - Dude...

I'm gonna tell her.

- ...That I know.

- About Girlhouse?

- Bad idea, dude.

- Okay, um... Why?

If she knows, then she'll

think that you think she's easy.

Any girl on a site like this

must be a whore.

But I don't think that.

It's not gonna matter, dude.

You wanna keep this thing going,

do not tell her.

Excuse me.

Hi.

Wow, looks intimidating

in there.

You must be pretty smart

if you know how to work

all those wires and buttons.

I've always been attracted

to smart men.

Men with brains.

But do you wanna know

what's not smart?

What's not smart

is coming to a job site

and then sexually harassing

one of the employees.

I saw what you were doing.

Tongue hanging out,

like some thirsty dog.

Get a good peek? Hmm?

One word to your boss, I could

have you fired like this.

Next time, think twice before

preying on innocent women.

Got it?

I said, you got it, you sick perv?

OH MY GOD!

Hmm. Not so smart after all.

Poor Jimmy Stewart,

with those two broken legs!

But he got the girl, so...

It is a pretty steep

price for love.

No price is too steep

for love, Kylie.

That was good, right,

a good Jimmy?

What are the odds

that we bump into each other

like that the other day?

It's crazy!

Well, maybe it wasn't so random.

What do you mean?

I um... I know.

About Girlhouse.

Oh, I see.

You saw something you liked

and you wanted to sample

the merchandise.

No, it's not like that at all.

I don't understand...

- You don't understand.

- Then help me.

- I'm going to go.

- Kylie...

I only brought it up 'cause I

don't want it to be an issue

moving forward.

Porn is not what it

used to be, okay?

It's totally different now.

It's mainstream and accepted.

I mean, think about Sasha Grey

or Jenna Jameson.

- There's no stigma. Nobody cares.

- Yeah, but...

- ...shouldn't they?

- I don't know.

What about these other guys

that are coming to the house?

Fair. It's not required.

Okay, but I assume it's a big

part of the job sooner or later.

Not necessarily. Girlhouse is

different. It's not like that.

The guys that log in,

it's not just for that.

They feel like

they're getting to know us.

They develop feelings,

they fall in love, even.

Come on, Kylie. They just

want to f*** you. That's all.

Well, I am not

that type of girl.

Yeah, that's what

I keep telling myself.

You know what, you have

no right to judge me, okay?

You have no idea what

I'm going through right now.

I'm doing this

so I don't have to quit school.

My dad's gone and my mom needs

all the help she can get.

And you know what, the guys?

That's the toughest part

about this.

Okay? I'm hoping I can just get

in there, make as much money

as I can, and then get out

before that becomes an issue.

I've thought this through

completely.

I really don't see

how anything bad could happen.

I'm sorry.

So... Is this, you know,

going to be a problem

moving forward?

Not until you ask me

to stay the night.

I am extremely camera-shy.

No idea, Loverboy.

I'm kinda busy here.

Loverboy, I'm trying

to do a show.

Jesus! I said I don't know

where she is.

You really are a pathetic freak.

- You were with him last night?

- Yeah, I had sex with him

the other night and then I told

you that he was small.

Well, I mean, he's okay...

Well, you told me that

he was small...

- Who is that?

- Oh, my God, look who it is!

- It's Loverboy... Yeah.

- Oh, Loverboy!

Hey, Loverboy, I'm just curious.

How did you come up with

that handle, "Loverboy"?

You must be quite

the ladies' man.

Could have gone with "Loserboy".

Definitely.

Janet! Janet! Come say hi

to Loverboy.

Aww, poor Loverboy!

Don't be mean.

- Enough of him.

- I mean, anyways.

What...

Enjoy the show.

Come on, have dinner

with me tonight.

We can drive back to Charlotte.

We can go to this awesome barbeque place,

you can meet my roommates...

How would I get back?

You could spend the night.

I told you I have study group.

But I'll take a rain check.

Because meeting your roommate is

totally worth the 70-mile drive.

Funny.

Is this some kind of joke?

Hey, buddy!

Private property,

you can't be here.

Turn around now,

before I make you.

All right, well,

you asked for it.

Ahh! F***, that... Oof!

Ooh, baby... Mm...

Oh, baby...

Can I help you?

Let me guess.

You're here for Devon?

No, wait... Heather.

She likes that kinky sh*t.

Well, run along.

Her room's upstairs.

Homie, you're really starting

to piss me off, man.

- Hi.

- Hey.

All right, boys,

ready to have your minds blown?

Only 3 of you?

...Or only 3 of you with your

hands free to type?

Yeah, screw this.

I'm going one-on-one.

Sorry, fellas. Tugboat and I

are going private.

I'm going to go.

Got a lot to do tonight.

Reading War and Peace or showing

your lady parts to all of humanity?

Real cute.

What the...

Okay.

What the f***?

What are you talking about?

Maybe jerking off really does

ruin your vision.

Aw, sh*t!

What's your problem, Tugboat?

Okay, is this a prank? Are you

trying to freak me out?

Not cool.

Okay, you know what?

If that's how you're

going to be,

this session is over. F*** you.

- HELP ME! NO! AHH!

- Shut up!

Jesus!

Dude, I need you to come here,

right now.

Somebody help...

What is this, a joke?

- Ahh, my face...

- What's that they say about beauty?

Something about skin deep?

Is this real? Is this really

happening right now,

or is it, like, some gimmick

to drive up traffic?

I don't know! They did some weird

sh*t before, but nothing like this!

Nobody knows.

Call 911, now, right now! Do it!

I gotta warn Kylie.

Sh*t!

- What the f***?

- 911, what's your emergency?

Hi, um, I don't really know

how to explain...

So I'm on this website

called Girlhouse.

- "Girlhouse"?

- It's a pornographic website.

Sir, I'm not following, this

line is for emergencies only.

Look, I realize that, but I'm

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