Goal of the Dead Page #5

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the match against Guingamp.

In the locker room.

- We drank a little too much.

- Yes.

- Yes. You and me.

- Yes.

- Just us two?

- Of course.

Maybe you were with

a bunch of swinger?

But after, establishing

paternity can be tricky.

So your Mum's a saint?

Finally, he's getting it.

So we did...

Sometimes I'm not very subtle.

You pucked up and passed out.

I Walked in it next morning.

But just before...

We must have...

No, we didn't.

This is Teddy. Do you copy?

This is Teddy of the Coyotes.

Anyone copy?

Teddy, this is Popeye. You OK?

Roger that. How are you?

Did you stuff the Parisians?

This is Captain Lorit.

Caplongue is under siege. I

repeat, Caplongue is under siege.

Send a SWAT team and army!

Yeah, I'll call them. I

got their cell number!

Hello Army? It's Popeye. I need a

nuclear sub for an hour or 2...

Listen to me, cretin,

and do what I say.

Move your ass and

get back to me, OK?

Shoot, Teddy! Shoot!

S-o-n-o-f-a-b-i-t-c-h!

For f***'s sake!

Sh*t, it stings!

They're coming!

Quick, quick, quick!

What happened?

He shot me in the belly.

It went in there...

What a mess.

No bars.

No bars.

The poor kid.

He tried to be tough

but he was a good kid.

I like him.

Diago, his knee was in bits.

In 2 years, it'd be f***ed.

You left him behind, too?

You're a scumbag, Zombroni.

You toss them aside and move on.

Come on. Don't give

me all that again.

Money's killing soccer, the true

value of the sport, blah blah.

The world's changed, old man.

You know what their

lives are like.

We take them out of the projects and

send them to training camp at 13.

Stop it, I might cry.

Then what's their new

life like, Marco?

Soccer, PlayStation,

more soccer.

Money and whores are

all they care about.

What's wrong with that?

Scumbags like you are

ruining the game.

You'd have let Idriss be handed

around from club to club.

So it's all for the best.

He's out of all that.

Yes, but it's over.

I've waited for this

moment for ages.

And I'm not going to waste it.

You know, I like you, Etienne.

We've had our differences but...

But now, right now,

I like you.

But if you don't want to get eaten,

we better plan our escape damn quick.

Nobody's leaving here.

We'll both die.

But I'm going to deal with you.

And you're lucky

because I still believe in

good old sporting values.

Fair and square.

- What are you doing?

- Put 'em up!

You've really lost it, Etienne.

You're a drag.

For f***'s sake!

Sorry Etienne, are you OK?

I had to put a stop to it.

Put 'em up!

Put 'em up!

OK, fine.

If that's what you want.

I'll smash your face in.

That's great! Give it your all!

Give it your all! Yeah!

I'm glad I met you

before I died.

- Me, too.

- You're not dying.

- He won't die, will he?

- It's very bad.

Is Dr Belvaux still around?

Don't go to Belvaux.

I'm taking him.

- I'll come.

- I will too, then.

You there, watch her.

We're not babysitters.

They're just drunks.

And smoking pot is better?

You take drugs?

Of course not, Grandpa.

We're getting the point here.

I don't care. I'm going.

Do what your dad says.

Just look at this mess!

- Here, kitty!

- Come along!

What do we do, Pitt?

Come on, come and get it.

Here, kitty!

There's lots and lots

and lots of them!

Here! Come on!

Come on, come on...

Come on!

No, no, no!

- Here!

- We're over here!

Caplongue a**hole!

Caplongue motherfuckers!

Yeah! Your mother, your sister,

your brother and your father!

Bunch of dickwads!

Up your ass! Up your ass!

I never felt part of a whole.

It's like there's something inside

me that needs to be different.

To emerge, to flourish, to

affirm myself, to be myself...

To get back to my roots.

No, listen,

I like my friends here,

but it's not the same.

I really identify with you.

Just wait a sec...

And let me tell you something...

This chat's really doing me good.

- Do yourself good over there, pal.

- No, because we're the same.

We're the same. Not

physically, of course.

But we feel rejected, we're

seeking our origins.

Me, here, coming

from the capital,

and you, your African side...

Great ancestral traditions,

arid landscapes... You get me?

- Not at all.

- Sure you do.

Integration, for example.

What integration?

I was born here!

Under that manly

protective shell...

There's a gentle heart.

Sorry about your bag.

It doesn't matter.

Have you got a cig?

I don't smoke.

Of course. You look

after your dream body.

You think I'm dumbass.

Aren't you a little egocentric? It's

all me, me, me and my problems...

Not at all. I love listening

to other people's stories.

I'm really fantastic listener.

Go right ahead.

I'm a dolly bird on TV

dressed up to the nines,

but my dream was to be a

foreign correspondent,

reporting on wars, famines...

And I'm at the end of my career,

lying about my age, no

idea about my future...

People always confuse me with

that fat tart on the weather.

I'll have to do

washing powder ads.

Or worse, charity stuff.

I've got a drink problem.

I just got stuck with a

stroppy 17-year-old.

Yep...

Indeed.

He kept it all, the swine!

The club from when I was a kid,

my molotov cocktails!

Look, this is yours.

Last year's smoke bombs.

Look, there's even

Michel's knife.

Give me a beer.

To Michael.

And to Cuillere.

Is there anyone in your life?

Apart from the editor who turns up when

his wife's at club Med with the kids?

- Apart from him.

- Then, no.

Solangue, if we ever

get out of here...

- Would you have dinner with me?

- Actually...

It's OK if not.

No, I'd like it, if we

ever get out of here.

Cool.

But I'd prefer you

to call me Solene.

Don't you get bored

drinking all day?

No.

Perhaps if your dad

hadn't run off...

- What the hell?

- Then Caplongue would have gone pro.

We'd have opened a sports

store, made a fortune,

we'd be married, would

have had kids...

Yeah.

And wouldn't drink

to get over it.

So my dad's responsible

for your pathetic lives?

So is he your dad or not?

Yes, he's my dad.

What do you mean?

Give me a beer.

Come on.

Stay there, dad.

Where am I going to go?

- Someone's there.

- They might be like the others.

You're right. I'll

go round back.

Come back!

- I got this. Stay there.

- I will.

Oh sh*t!

Hide!

It's that girl again!

She's after me.

You two have got something.

She's got something

with herself!

Look at her! She's not my type!

OK, I'll do her. I'll do her.

Doctor?

Doctor?

You a**hole!

Doctor? Oh sh*t!

Sorry, I though you were a...

You know...

- Come on.

- Let's go, Dad.

Here we go.

Idriss!

OK.

Take it easy...

Let me look at him.

Now...

Let's have a look.

That's not good. It's

starting to weep.

That's very nasty indeed.

Gently! It hurt like a bastard!

No way!

Yeah, I took a while

to find myself.

- Mullets were cool back then.

- That's no what I mean.

He came onto the pitch earlier.

- He contamined everyone.

- Jeannot?

Excuse me...

I'm going to fetch my bag.

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