Goon Page #6

until they come home and stop fighting.

You understand what I'm saying?

Erm... I don't know. No.

Kid, you got this thing, the stuff, the sh*t,

the f***ing grit. You got it, like me.

But like me, that's all you f***ing got.

And like me, you're no good to anyone

doing anything else.

Don't go trying to be a hockey player.

You'll get your heart ripped out.

- But I am a hockey player, sir.

- You're a f***ing goon.

- That plays hockey. Like you.

- I don't play much hockey.

You're a hockey player, sir.

You know they just want you to bleed,

right?

I'm here to do whatever they need me

to do. If they need me to bleed,

then I'll bleed for my team.

Yeah.

I suppose you heard I'm going to retire

at the end of this season?

I've been at this since I was 17

but I'm not going to go out like

some nancy-boy f***. You understand?

Yeah, I understand.

You have my respect,

whatever that means to you - you got it.

But know this sh*t hard.

If ever it gets down to the marrow

and it's you and me,

kid, I will lay you the f*** out.

Come on!

F***ing.. Let me... F***ing...

Get the f*** off me!

Everyone knows

what I'm here for.

To kick f***ing ass!

That's right. I fight.

I fight for my team.

They need me to bleed, then I bleed.

I started my career here at St. John's.

I think it's only fitting

that I'm winding it up here.

That being said,

I still got some fight in me left.

What do you say, boys?

Let's go to playoffs.

Give an old man one last shot at the rink.

God bless Newfoundland.

It's a rough physical game tonight.

Both teams battling

for the eighth and final playoff spot.

- Come on!

- Stevenson is levelled by Rhea.

- Where's the call?

- And the Shamrocks score!

St. John's has taken an early lead.

Rhea absolutely running over the poor

Highlanders. It's energy on the ice.

Cheap shot, Rhea. No need.

Take it.

- I got to fight you.

- Come on, Gord.

- You know how this ends.

- No sh*t.

- Come here. Come on.

- Oh! Are you sure?

Come on, Gord.

Whoa, whoa!

I can do this all night, boys.

Only Ogilvey's third fight of his career.

If I wanted any lip from you,

I'll rattle my zipper.

A for effort, Captain,

and D for Doug Glatt.

Are you there, Doug?!

It's me, Margaret!

# Rain, rain, rain showers

# So glad that you came... #

Xavier, are you up? I'm an idiot.

From now on, no matter what happens,

if you want to punch me in the face

or spit in my mouth while I'm asleep,

it doesn't matter.

I'm always going to be watching

your back.

I think we both have a light

in our stomachs, a special light,

like ET, and the team needs somebody

to light the way.

My stomach light

needs your stomach light.

We can all phone home together.

# And I don't know why I wait... #

Two home games left, both must-wins

or they're going to wind up

on the golf course early.

That doesn't sound so bad to me.

18 holes and a Reuben.

Here come the Highlanders!

Glatt, what the f***? Hockey!

Head up, head up. Go, go, go, go.

Glatt, what are you doing?

Here's the pass over to Laflamme.

He's run into by Finnirty

and now Glatt comes in.

Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!

Hey, man.

Nice fight.

Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!

The puck's in the Highlanders' zone

and they bring it away.

Here's Laflamme, he moves it over to

Glatt, he gets it back to Laflamme.

He scored! Laflamme scores the goal

with an assist going to Glatt.

Whoo!

Nice one, Dougie!

- Nice assist, man.

- Thanks.

69! Doug!

69! Yeah!

Well, it has come down to this, folks.

The Highlanders need this win

to keep their playoff hopes alive.

Laflamme serving a major with his team

nursing a tenuous one-goal lead.

Can they hang on?

I love you, Mom.

Dougie, keep that crease clean!

Stay by that crease the whole time.

Let's get f***ing real.

Let's get f***ing real.

Now the puck is back to the point.

- There's going on six attackers.

- Hold the box, boys.

There's a shot coming in...

- Come on, Dougie!

- Seconds tick down. There's 27 of them.

Come on, now, let's go!

- Clear it out!

- Clear the f***ing crease!

I can't see the shot.

Go right, go right. I'm down! I'm down!

Three, two...

..one...

No goal, no goal.

You're gonna die,

you motherfuckers!

Dougie! Doug!

- Eat it, puss-puss.

- Fight like a f***ing man!

Come on!

You've done it before, you p*ssy.

I know you f*** your players.

Don't deny it.

- Did we win?

- Get him out of there, please.

You stopped it, man. You f***ing did it.

Oh, f***.

- It didn't hurt at all.

- Dougie, you did it. We won it.

Big win here tonight for Halifax

but they'll still need one more

if they're to advance to the playoffs.

They meet the St. John's Shamrocks

for the eighth and final playoffs spot

and if the hockey gods truly exist,

and aren't just a figment of

my ageing imagination,

we'll finally get to see

that long-awaited battle

between Ross Rhea and Doug Glatt.

Okay.

Gather round here, Highlanders.

Belchie! F***ing horse cock,

get over here.

Listen, boys,

this was a solid f***ing effort tonight.

I f***ing loved it

and Dougie took one in the face!

- I'm high on painkillers.

- Pass the duchy, man.

I got some for you.

I am so f***ing proud.

You are un-f***ing-real.

The stuff that you're... that is

is f***ing great.

- Thank you.

- You're our knight.

You're f***ing all right, eh?

Thanks, Coach.

Eva!

Hey, hey.

No!

Hey, what happened?

- Did you just watch "Rudy"?

- No.

I did it. I broke up with him.

- Holy sh*t.

- I don't even know what the f***...

Hey, come on.

From what I saw of him,

he seemed like a really nice guy.

I'm just not in love with him.

- You're not?

- No.

You.

You make me want to stop

sleeping with a bunch of guys.

That's the nicest thing

anybody's ever said to me.

I'm so sorry. It's my fault.

She's a wonderful girl.

Hit me again.

- Hi, there, I'm Eva.

- This is er...

Dakota?

Yeah. Whatever.

Doug, where were you?

- Oh, my God!

- What the f*** happened to you?

What, this?

- It's nothing.

- What the f*** happened, Doug?

- When you deserve a beating you take it.

- Oh, Jesus, Doug.

..St. John's and Halifax,

this will matk the first occasion

that Ross Rhea and Xavier Laflamme

will share the ice

since that brutal hit three years ago

in Montreal.

- Laflamme was severely concussed...

- Christ.

- ..and never found his legs again...

- I made a dive.

Talk about putting out Laflamme.

Look at you.

Did you fall off a toilet paper roll?

Do you pee rainbows?

Do you fart cinnamon?

- Don't ruin this for Doug.

- Do rainbows come out your nipples?

I'm not here because I'm a good captain,

because I'm not.

I f***ed up a lot of things in my life.

I lost my woman

and I don't see my kid enough

and I guess what I'm trying to say is

I feel I've gained a family

with you boys.

You skated, you fought

and you f***ing bled

and you have earned every piece of this.

You got that sh*t

that makes you keep going

long after you got no reason to.

That Doug sh*t.

He's got it. He's got the stuff.

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