Grabbers

Haven Point, Haven Point, Haven Point,

this is trawler Sea Harvester.

Position - Five nautical

miles west of Erin Island.

Responding to unknown

distress flare, over.

That was not a flare.

Sea Harvester, this is

Haven Point Coast Guard.

Can you see the vessel in distress?

Roy! You seeing anything?

No!

Wait!

Oh, Jesus' Stripes!

Roy!

Radio out a Mayday.

Sea Harvester

Echo-Whiskey-Niner-Eight-Five.

Man overboard! Man overboard!

Man overboard!

Roy!

Jesus! Skipper!

Dad!

Sea Harvester, Emergency Rescue despatched. Please respond, over.

Oh, sh*t.

Hi, O'Shea, isn't it? Ciarn?

My name is Lisa Nolan, Garda Lisa Nolan.

- You are not serious?

- What?

You getting in or what?

- I have a bag.

- Put it in the boot.

- Would you like a mint?

- Hmm?

No, thanks. They give me a heartburn.

Garda Nolan. 'Tis lovely to have you.

- Lovely to be here.

- Lovely to have you.

Oh... coffee.

Oh, that'll be great,

thank you. Here you go.

So...

- What do you think of the place?

- It's gorgeous, isn't it?

- It is, indeed. 'Tis, indeed.

- Quiet as shite.

- Milk?

- What kind?

- Cow's.

- I'll just take a black, thanks.

So, you are gonna have

my desk, when I'm gone.

O'Shea here will tell you, with half the

island leaving for the show on Dungary,

it'll be dead this weekend.

- I'm sure I'll find something to do.

- Sure you will.

- Here you go now.

- Thanks.

- She really necessary?

- Do tell me, boy.

You are only gone two weeks.

I can handle two weeks.

You could, but you wouldn't!

Tadhg, take a look at this.

It's a big 'un.

- That's not a lobster.

- Then what is it?

Feck! You bastard, you! Paddy!

You knew it was going to do that.

I didn't, on me life.

Ugh! The smell!

- What is it?

- 'Tis no fekkin' lobster!

I had some holidays saved,

that needed to be taken, and...

this posting came up and I just thought,

you know, "What harm? Why not?"

Can't hurt with the

Review Board, you know.

Ah... the old Review Board.

- Where are you stationed?

- Dublin Central.

- How's that working out for you?

- Oh, it's great.

We've got our drugs, muggings,

murders and rapes. Always on the go.

Oh, it's exciting. You can relax,

there's none of that here.

You never know. It's always the quiet

places where the mad sh*t happens.

Just open a paper.

In all my years, I've never

seen anything like it.

Lisa Nolan. Jim Gleeson, local doctor.

- Hello, love, how are you?

- Grand, thanks.

Wouldn't have any aspirin

on you, would you, Jim?

I have a couple of wine gums.

Would you like a wine gum?

- All right.

- Look who's here.

I'd prefer it if you'd

introduced me as 'Garda Nolan'.

- Nobody minds.

- I do.

- What happened?

- Yeah... one second.

- Smith.

- Lisa.

- Hi.

- Hi.

Smith's a marine psychologist

or something.

- Did I get that right?

- No, it's marine ecology.

Will you hold this a second?

So, how long are you here for?

I'm here two weeks.

Oh, wonderful. Whereabouts you staying?

So... they are dead.

Dead? Oh, no. They are just sleeping.

- So, what happened?

- Well...

They are pilot whales.

It happens with them from time to time,

but no one really knows why.

And what are all these deep cuts?

Possible wounds from the rocks,

while being washed up here.

- They didn't beach themselves?

- Oh, no. They died at sea.

All of them? At once?

- Yeah, it's a strange one all right.

- Yeah.

- Squeamish?

- No.

- No?

- No.

Good to know.

Okay, there's an orifice...

What's that?

- What is that?

- That.

It's a hand in a claw position?

It's a dead one of those.

That's global, isn't it?

- I don't get it.

- You don't get it?

- No.

- What's not to get?

"What's that? It's a dead one of those"

No.

Don't get it.

You there, what's your name?

Chemisov Wlodzimierz Voychehovski.

Carry on.

Hey, Daly! Where is Cooney?

Put that cigarette out, or I go down and

use your top of your knob as an ashtray.

You busy?

Not at all. Just strip

'em down, and I take 'em.

- Where's the sarge?

- He's away on his holiday.

- Leave me up sh*t creek.

- Why? What's up with you?

Remember that favour you owe me?

Well, I'm looking for some boys to help

move a few 'things' off the beach there.

It's an hour's work, tops.

What sorta... things?

Let's get outta here.

Whale sandwiches forever, huh?

Daly! The shovels!

- What?

- Don't be leaving things behind, you!

- Going, sir!

- Gobshite (idiot).

Brilliant.

Daly!

Where are you, you gobshite?

Daly!

...last night, but by the time the Coast

Guard arrived at the scene, the men...

were no longer on board. With bad

weather set to hamper tomorrow's search,

the hope of finding the

missing fishermen alive,

has grown bleaker by the hour.

Officials believe, the crew of the

Sea Harvester were washed overboard...

Hi, I'm just looking for an iron.

Yeah, I'll just go and

hock it out for ya.

Great, thanks.

- Hiya.

- Hi.

- That's you.

- Thanks.

Now, it gets very hot,

so just keep it moving, yeah?

Okay, thank you. See you tomorrow.

As a woman, to a man,

now I tell you, O'Shea,

there's a twinkle in the

eye in there for you.

- What?

- He'll be up in a minute!

You like her?

She's all right. A little uptight.

- You should talk to her.

- I do talk to her.

- I mean, talk to her.

- Ah, leave him off, Una.

Do you listen to him? Eight years, I was

waiting for him to go down on his knee.

Have you ever heard the like of it?

My family thought I was mad,

wasting my time on him.

- Ah, feck them.

- Ah, feck you, Brian.

- Same again?

- Pour on.

- What is it, Paddy?

- Wouldn't you like to know.

- Not really, no.

- You would, though.

- No, not really.

- You would.

If you were to know what I know,

you'd want to know.

- All right, tell us then.

- Right, you are.

Between you and me, I caught

meself a sea monster today.

Swear to God, may He strike me down.

- You don't believe me?

- Not a bit.

I am not a liar.

- Huh!

- Feck off, you!

All right, where is it?

- In me bathtub.

- In your bathtub?

Having a bath.

Good night, Paddy.

Ignorant bollocks.

- What?

- Huh?

- What did you say?

- Nothing, didn't say a word.

He called you a bollix (idiot).

If this wasn't the only fekkin'

pub on this shittin' island,

I'd piss in it sooner than come in here!

Fine, you are barred.

Ah... I am joking. Come on now,

another one here now.

They are coming to get you, Barbara.

- They are coming for you.

- Stop it! You are acting like a child!

They are coming for you, Barbara.

Look! There comes one of them now!

- He'll hear you!

- Here he comes now.

Irene! Irene!

- What?

- Someone's at the door!

I'm not dressed!

All right, all right.

That better not be Paddy

and his stinking lobster.

It's the bloody Declan Cooney,

and he's pissed as a fart.

Don't give that cowboy any money. You're

gonna piss it up against the wall!

Cooney, you look like death.

What are you doing?

What does he want?

To dance?

Jesus, Cooney! Are you all right, mate?

Cooney?

Tadhg! Tadhg! Tadhg!

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